Page 166
Story: Mess With Me
I wrap my hands around her ribs, pressing my thumbs up above where they meet in the middle, just under her heart. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to you in time,” I whisper.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes it does.” I pull my face back, meeting her eyes. “You should never forgive me for not getting there in time.”
Sasha smiles again, her eyes watering. It’s a smile so beautiful my chest feels cracked in half.
It’s a smile I don’t deserve.
But Sasha shakes her head. “Chester’s a part of you, Griffin. Don’t you know that? We have him because of you. He saved me because of you.”
I take in a ragged breath. I’m going to fuckin sob like a baby if she keeps this up.
“Besides,” she continues. “You did the biggest thing anyone’s ever done for me. You cared.”
I want to laugh that off, but Sasha shakes her head. “I’m serious.”
Maybe it’s her words, or maybe it’s the way she doesn’t let me look away, but for the first time, I let the words sink in. Could it be possible that, after trying everything else and failing, caring is still something precious?
I may never forgive myself for letting Sasha almost die, but there’s no arguing I didn’t care. I cared about Laura, too. It wasn’t anything like it is with Sasha, but I cared. And maybe if I care so damn much, I might think about one day believing that sometimes, after trying everything else, it’s enough.
“Fuck,” I say finally, pulling away and scrubbing my hand over my face. “Is this what it’s going to be like if you decide to stay with me? All thesefeelingsall the time?”
She nods. “Probably.”
Once I can breathe again, I pull her toward me, right out of the bed and onto my lap. “Your brother looked out for you, too,” I whisper, even though it pains me to say it.
“He did,” she says. “But I helped a little.”
Now I laugh, a low chuckle that has me tipping my head down and kissing her shoulder. “More than a little.”
“You made that happen, too,” she says. “It was your trick with the ties.”
But this time I get to be right when I shake my head. “No, Angel. That was all you.”
Sasha goes to wrap her arms around my neck, but she’s restrained by the clip on her thumb. She pops the monitor off, making the machine beep and flash.
She wraps her arms around me. “I love you, Griffin. Did you know that?”
“I wasn’t sure,” I whisper. “I hoped.” I fucking prayed, honestly.
I hold her jaw in my hand, then take her mouth with mine. I kiss her as if it’s the first time. Soft. Urgent. A dance of lips and tongue. Heat surges, running through my body like a runaway flame.
“You’re supposed to keep that monitor on, young lady.”
Sasha breaks the kiss, giggling.
The nurse, a retirement-aged woman with a kind smile who’s been in and out all night, stands in the door like your friendly neighborhood cock-blocker.
Her hands are planted on her hips, but I can tell she’s trying not to smile, too.
“You don’t want to know what my heart rate’s doing right now, Lisa,” Sasha says.
The nurse rolls her eyes but laughs as she bustles in. “Well, I’d be smiling too if my husband looked at me the way this one does at you. All mine cares about these days is his fantasy football league.” She sighs, walking briskly over to Sasha’s bed and switching the monitor off. “We’re just waiting for the shift change to get you discharged anyway.” Nurse Lisa pulls open the curtains, where dawn is just breaking. “It’s been quite a night between all of you. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to fantasize about my bed.”
The older woman looks at us, her cheeks pinkening. “Poor choice of words around y’all. You two are newlyweds, right?”
Sasha and I look at each other, and instantly that electricity snaps between us.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes it does.” I pull my face back, meeting her eyes. “You should never forgive me for not getting there in time.”
Sasha smiles again, her eyes watering. It’s a smile so beautiful my chest feels cracked in half.
It’s a smile I don’t deserve.
But Sasha shakes her head. “Chester’s a part of you, Griffin. Don’t you know that? We have him because of you. He saved me because of you.”
I take in a ragged breath. I’m going to fuckin sob like a baby if she keeps this up.
“Besides,” she continues. “You did the biggest thing anyone’s ever done for me. You cared.”
I want to laugh that off, but Sasha shakes her head. “I’m serious.”
Maybe it’s her words, or maybe it’s the way she doesn’t let me look away, but for the first time, I let the words sink in. Could it be possible that, after trying everything else and failing, caring is still something precious?
I may never forgive myself for letting Sasha almost die, but there’s no arguing I didn’t care. I cared about Laura, too. It wasn’t anything like it is with Sasha, but I cared. And maybe if I care so damn much, I might think about one day believing that sometimes, after trying everything else, it’s enough.
“Fuck,” I say finally, pulling away and scrubbing my hand over my face. “Is this what it’s going to be like if you decide to stay with me? All thesefeelingsall the time?”
She nods. “Probably.”
Once I can breathe again, I pull her toward me, right out of the bed and onto my lap. “Your brother looked out for you, too,” I whisper, even though it pains me to say it.
“He did,” she says. “But I helped a little.”
Now I laugh, a low chuckle that has me tipping my head down and kissing her shoulder. “More than a little.”
“You made that happen, too,” she says. “It was your trick with the ties.”
But this time I get to be right when I shake my head. “No, Angel. That was all you.”
Sasha goes to wrap her arms around my neck, but she’s restrained by the clip on her thumb. She pops the monitor off, making the machine beep and flash.
She wraps her arms around me. “I love you, Griffin. Did you know that?”
“I wasn’t sure,” I whisper. “I hoped.” I fucking prayed, honestly.
I hold her jaw in my hand, then take her mouth with mine. I kiss her as if it’s the first time. Soft. Urgent. A dance of lips and tongue. Heat surges, running through my body like a runaway flame.
“You’re supposed to keep that monitor on, young lady.”
Sasha breaks the kiss, giggling.
The nurse, a retirement-aged woman with a kind smile who’s been in and out all night, stands in the door like your friendly neighborhood cock-blocker.
Her hands are planted on her hips, but I can tell she’s trying not to smile, too.
“You don’t want to know what my heart rate’s doing right now, Lisa,” Sasha says.
The nurse rolls her eyes but laughs as she bustles in. “Well, I’d be smiling too if my husband looked at me the way this one does at you. All mine cares about these days is his fantasy football league.” She sighs, walking briskly over to Sasha’s bed and switching the monitor off. “We’re just waiting for the shift change to get you discharged anyway.” Nurse Lisa pulls open the curtains, where dawn is just breaking. “It’s been quite a night between all of you. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to fantasize about my bed.”
The older woman looks at us, her cheeks pinkening. “Poor choice of words around y’all. You two are newlyweds, right?”
Sasha and I look at each other, and instantly that electricity snaps between us.
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