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"Queer content for sure. Not a huge fan of gore or horror, but I'll watch thrillers and crime stuff. Mostly queer." She glanced at me and motioned to our left. "We can watch something together now if you want. My place isn't far."

"Okay. You have a particularly queer movie in mind?"

"Kind of. It's queer coded, but I'm not sure if it'll turn out that way. Willing to take the risk?" She smiled and turned to lead the way toward the harbor apartments.

"Sure."

"Me too. C'mon." She waved for me to follow her, and her pace quickened as we turned the corner.

I felt myself smiling differently then, with my skateboard gripped against my hip as I hurried after her. I didn't quite understand Clem or her intentions overall, but she seemed trustworthy enough. If I allowed myself to explore my own emotions, I could see myself wanting to know her better and perhaps—never mind.

That was enough for the moment.

Chapter Seven

"So, the kid is now a bigger kid," said Sali as we stood together in the conference room back at the precinct. She pinched her chin between her fingers while she paced heatedly back and forth. Her brow forever narrowed with a scowl to accompany it made her face appear just as young as she did in the photos hanging in Walsh's office. Only he seemed to age these days, with less hair but twice as many puffs of vapes.

I sipped my energy drink and nodded. "Eight. Think we can interview her?"

"She had a recovery interview back in twenty-nineteen. Doubt anything else will result from another."

"But memories come back differently. She's old enough to tell us about nightmares now or fragmented memory pieces of childhood. Isn't it worth it?"

"Not sure I want to put the kid through that." Sali turned to the case files littering the table. She flipped one open and showed me what looked like a school picture of the girl with long brown hair. "She lives with her father. He raised her alone. From what I understand, she's fragile. Anxious, but a good kid overall. Well-adjusted."

"Which could mean she has some memories if she's anxious," I said while looking over the materials.

"Nah." Sali shook her head then closed the file. "Not taking the risk." She paced again, her thumb against her chin while I watched her. Sali wasn't known to be cautious, but rather reckless, and it made me wonder about her motives.

"Not worth the risk of catching a killer?"

"Not worth the risk of traumatizing a kid who is otherwise okay," she said, rounding on me with a frown. "How would you feel, Roth, if someone showed up and started asking you questions about your dead mother and you were just eight-years-old?"

When she put it like that, it cooled me off some. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah, rando. Go ahead." She waved for me to continue.

"When you became a detective, did you ever wish you hadn't? Like…did you ever miss patrol?" The question left me gently, but the heaviness followed.

"Why? Miss it?" Sali pushed herself up to sit on the table beside me, gripping the edge of it.

"Sometimes. The routine of it. Knowing what to do instead of sitting around postulating and thinking about what to do next. Naked guy at the grocery store? Easy. Domestic dispute? Got it. Speeding ticket? Fine. School security? On it. This?" I motioned around us. "I don't know what I'm doing."

"You're not supposed to know what you're doing," she said, staring at me with eyes that nearly scathed my soul. "Being a detective is about someone noticing that you got skills that are worth developing. So…develop." She shrugged. "Or don't. If you preferred patrol, there's nothing wrong with that. People build healthy careers just that way."

"I know. I'm just doubting this a bit more lately." I shrugged and glanced at the door to make sure Zay and Maggie stayed out of earshot. "I kind of fell into it anyway."

"Oh, I know." Sali grinned, a wickedly menacing grin that suited her face. "I know all about your shenanigans, Jagz. Including what got you here and how my wife dragged you around for a while."

"She's fast." I smirked and folded my arms. "We've been in a few foot races."

Sali laughed, nodding with her amusement. "She is. Though I outrun her all the time."

I chuckled and rolled my eyes. "With those tiny legs? I sense lies."

"So many lies." Sali grinned and clapped me on the shoulder. "Do what feels right for you, kid. See this case through though. I know it's overwhelming, but we're on it."

I adjusted my hat, fondling the brim that covered the back of my neck before playing with the snapback strap thing while I thought about the things she said to me. "I should probably go back and talk to Bernice. She was definitely holding out."