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“Wow.” Cohen let out a breath and rubbed his chin. “Who is it?”
I frowned. “I can’t say. Ollie also asked me to keep his identity private.”
“I guess it doesn’t matter who so much as the fact that Ollie’s been heartbroken all this time and hasn’t felt like he could tell us.” Cohen shook his head, blinking quickly. “Poor Ollie.”
The guilt Cohen so clearly felt made my heart ache for him. I reached out and put a hand on his wrist. “I think Ollie was more worried about protecting this other boy than protecting himself.”
Cohen looked up at me, then stood, pacing back and forth in front of me.
Worry immediately flooded me. Was Cohen mad I hadn’t revealed the other student’s identity? “Cohen, I’m so sorry.”
He paused, turning toward me, looking genuinely confused. “For what?”
“I just...” I stood, setting my glass on the coffee table. “I wanted to help, but I feel like this answer is so messy.”
He cupped my cheek with his hand. “Birdie... If parenthood, marriage, divorce has taught me anything, it’s thatlifeis messy.” He ran his thumb over my cheekbone. “I used to want to run away from it all, but now I know better.”
I looked into his green eyes, searching for the answer in the depths. When I couldn’t find it, I asked, “What do you want now?”
He smiled, then dropped a gentle kiss on my lips. “Someone to sit with me in the mess.”
His answer caught me off guard, and I smiled. “No one’s more acquainted with messiness than I am.”
Taking my hand, he pulled me onto his lap on the couch. My back rested against his chest, and the rise and fall of his breaths calmed me in a way I hadn’t felt for a very long time.
“What do you mean?” he asked, running his fingers lightly over my forearm.
I leaned back against his shoulder, looking at the ceiling. “I had to leave my place because my boyfriend left me, and I didn’t have enough time to find another apartment. So I’m staying with my best friend, who doesn’t even have a high school diploma and makes more than I ever will. Oh, and did I mention my boyfriend was actually my fiancé?”
“Oof,” he said. “That hurts.”
“On a multitude of levels.”
“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I was the one who blew my marriage.”
I twisted to look at him. Cohen was so even-keeled and kind. Why wouldn’t his wife want to stay with him? “What do you mean?”
“Our relationship was always...more effort because we got married out of obligation instead of love. Keeping things going was hard under the best of circumstances, but starting the bar made it even more challenging. I focused more on my business than I did on her because I didn’t want her parents to keep funding our lifestyle.”
I raised my eyebrows.
“They paid for Ollie to go to the Academy, they put the down payment on our house, her mom would take her shopping during the week. And there were always these comments, like I wasn’t enough for their daughter.” He shook his head. “So I tried to be enough in all the wrong ways. And then she found someone who actually was.”
His hand had stalled on my arm, so I held it, lacing my fingers through his.
“Messy,” I said.
He nodded. “But without it, I wouldn’t get the beautiful moments either. Ollie. The bar.” He squeezed my hand. “You.”
My heart warmed, and I twisted, kissing him with everything I felt but couldn’t find the words to say.
Our embrace deepened, his hands tangling in my curls and my fingers fisting in his shirt until there was too much between us to let it go any longer.
He peeled off my Emerson Academy shirt, baring my chest to him, and looked at me in awe, loving my body with his eyes. “I’m never going to get used to how beautiful you are,” he said, almost to himself.
I would never get used to how beautiful he made me feel. I closed the gap between us, kissing his lips where sweet words always seemed to flow, and reached down to unbutton his jeans. All of these feelings, I wanted to pour them out, to show this man how much I absolutely adored him.
Once his jeans were off, I slid from his lap, kneeling before him on the floor and coming closer to his hard, veiny length.