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The friends he was already flanked by laughed, joking about why a sophomore would be talking to a senior as popular as Ryde.
He played right into the act, shutting his locker and grinning at his friends like he couldn’t believe it either.
Rolling my eyes, I walked away, going into the boys’ bathroom. There was a person in the stall, but I banged on the door. “Out.”
A freshman came out looking surprised and left without washing his hands. Gross.
Then Ryde came in, looking pissed, and said, “What the hell, Lee? I thought I said not at school!”
Well, I wasn’t the only one who was ticked off. “What were you doing in the office with your mom and Ms. Melrose?”
His shoulders stiffened, confirming my fears. I felt cold, like icy acid was dripping over my skin, ruining everything exposed to Ryde.
“I thought I asked you not to tell your mom about my dad and Birdie!”
He raised his eyebrows. “Oh, so now she’s Birdie? I thought you were pissed he kept it from you? Serves him right for keeping secrets.”
My mouth fell open, and I wanted to scream. I didn’t know who the hell this pompous ass was standing across from me, but it wasn’t Ryde. It wasn’t the guy I’d spent hours with locked in the A/V room, sharing secrets and kisses.
“It wasn’t your secret to tell,” I said.
Ryde shrugged. “It’s done, Lee.”
“That’s it?” I stammered. “You destroy our guidance counselor’s life and probably ruin my dad’s chances with her and all you can say is ‘it’s done’?”
Ryde rolled his eyes and started to walk out of the bathroom. “I don’t have time for this. I need to get to class.”
I grabbed his shirt, not finished yet. “Birdie was the only one who advocated for your education and the one who cared enough to keep us a secret from your parents and mine.” I studied his face, seeing the contempt there. The utter lack of guilt. “You don’t care.”
“I don’t,” he said. “I only care about you.” He leaned closer, almost pressing his lips to mine, but I stepped back.
His eyebrows drew together. “What the fuck?”
“You can’t just kiss me and fix this!” I hissed.
“What are you saying?” he demanded.
“You ruined lives, Ryde. And all you’ve been doing is playing with mine.” I lifted my middle finger and held it up. “Fuck you.”
I walked out of the bathroom and left him in my past, exactly where he belonged.
59
BIRDIE
Confession: Potato chips are my comfort food.
I walked down the sidewalk to Mara’s house, holding Ralphie’s cage in my arms. Before I even reached the front door, I saw the curtains fall back and the door open. Mara came rushing out.
“They fired you?”
Tearfully, I nodded.
She took Ralphie’s cage, setting it on the ground, then pulled me into a tight hug. “Let’s put Ralphie inside, and then we’re going out.”
I stepped back, looking at her in shock. “Go out? All I feel like doing is lying in my bed and crying. And then maybe drawing some circles around want ads.”
“There will be time for both of those things.”