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“What’s wrong, Viren? You were screaming in your sleep,” she whispered when I forced myself to sit up. “Are you okay?”

I nodded and reached for the bottle of water on my bedside table. I drained the bottle before I turned to Sunaina.

“I’m fine. It’s just a nightmare,” I said hoarsely, trying to regulate my breathing.

She sat back on her heels and studied me carefully.

“Do you often get them?”

I shook my head in reply.

“I first got them after Aisha’s parents died, but I haven’t had them in ages. I wonder why they showed up again.”

“Maybe it’s the stress about the adoption home visit that has triggered them again,” she suggested.

But I knew better.

The adoption was a cinch now that even Tahira had moved out of our house. Laxmi Aunty was still here, but she was helpless without her chief jaasoos. No, this was different. It was as if my mind was trying to tell me something.

Sunaina held me until I fell asleep again. But the same thing happened the next night. Only this time around, I dreamt of both Sunaina and Aisha trapped in the burning car. I couldn’t tell my wife the details of the nightmare because it was far too horrifying, but I couldn’t close my eyes anymore for fear of what I might see if I fell asleep.

I could tell Sunaina was worried because I stayed awake all night only to fall into an exhausted, dreamless sleep in the early hours of the morning.

“Do you want to consult someone about these nightmares, Viren? You look terrible,” she commented one morning just a day before the home visit.

“Then don’t look at me,” I replied curtly, draining my cup of coffee and walking away from the breakfast table without a second glance.

CHAPTER 26

SUNAINA

Ididn’t know that a person could have such a personality transplant in just three weeks’ time.

Sure, I knew Viren was exhausted because of the nightmares. But it was more than just that. Because he wasn’t taking it out on Daya Bua, Sufi or Aisha. This special treatment was reserved only for me.

“We show our best and worst sides to the person we love the most, beta,” said Daya Bua, trying to make me feel better. “Please be patient with him. I promise you he will behave much better once the adoption comes through.”

“I don’t believe that, Bua,” I said cynically. “Viren is showing me that he doesn’t need me anymore.”

Even though I tried to fight it every single day, my stepmother’s words had stayed with me. They had taken root inside my brain. Every time Viren rebuffed my efforts to help him, every time he pulled away from my touch, I heard her voicein my head telling me I was unloveable. That Viren was just using me to make the adoption go smoother.

At some level, I knew he wasn’t like that. I knew he was the soul of generosity. But then he went and did or said something so rude to me that I’d be convinced he hated me.

“Don’t give up on him, Sue,” urged Sufi.

“He’s given up on me, Sufi,” I retorted.

“So hold on even tighter. He needs you the most when he’s pushing you away the hardest, even if he’s not ready to admit it. Not even to himself.”

“But why is he pushing me away at all?”

“Because he’s falling in love with you, beta,” said Daya Bua. “And if there is anything that terrifies Viren, it is love.”

“No, Daima. He’s not afraid of love. He’s afraid of losing the people he loves,” corrected Sufi. “And that’s to be expected in the circumstances.”

“That hasn’t stopped him from loving you guys and Aisha,” I said wistfully. “But when it comes to me, he’s fighting it with all his might as if I’m a chudail trying to steal his soul.”

“Did he tell you what these nightmares are about?” asked Daya Bua.