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Jaz widens her eyes.
“Yeah...” I trail off.
“He wasn’t messing around.”
“I guess there are some things I really don’t want to know,” I echo the thoughts that have been spinning in my head lately.
Jaz and I spend a couple of hours catching up. Not that we hadn’t talked every day since everything started, but when you have a best friend, there’s always something to talk about. We only break up the welcome party when Jared knocks on the door.
Jaz greets him with a hug, and he reaches down to pinch her ass. I smile and look away, telling myself I’m definitely not going to be the girl who’s jealous of her best friend just because her relationship didn’t work out. I’m still talking myself into smiling when Jared greets me. “Hey, Leenie. Good to see you back here.”
I press my lips together then turn toward him with a smile. “Thanks, Jared. How have you been? Sorry to come back and interrupt your house of loving.”
He chuckles. “Eh, I’d rather Jazzie have her best friend back.”
Jazzie? Ummm. Well, that’s a new one. “Aww,” I turn to Jaz with a quizzical look. She did not tell me they were into the weird nicknames part of the relationship. “He’s a keeper.”
She fits under his arm, placing her hand on his chest. “Isn’t he?”
She’s got that lovesick look on her face, so I get up from my spot on the couch. “I really need to unpack and get reacquainted with my room. You guys have fun,” I singsong as I make my way into the bedroom, shutting the door without looking back. I don’t want Jaz to tell me I can hang out with them because even though I know I can, it doesn’t mean I actually want to. Funny how I hated being alone in the tower, but right now, I kind of just want to be by myself.
At some point during our conversation, Jaz had dropped my two bags back into my room, so I return all my sexy clothes to my drawers and closet, frowning. All of the extra planning was a waste because every single time something did happen with Finn, I wasn’t dressed appropriately.
It takes me all of five minutes to unpack, so afterward, I go to the bed, lying down with my arms outstretched. It’s different from Finn’s. The mattress is kind of lumpy, actually. And it doesn’t smell like him either.
Holy Christ. I’m being pathetic.
I sit up, write an email to my boss to tell her that I can come back to work tomorrow. Then I screw around on the internet, looking for rescue dogs. I check the local pound’s website but I soon get bored of that too. Through the thin walls, I hear Jaz and Jared talking, so I put on some headphones and play the last playlist I put together.
The angry music almost shocks me. I’d forgotten when I got home from the fights the first time that I scoured the streaming service for hype songs. I listen for a little while before pulling out my phone. While the loud music still reverberates in my ear, I type out a text to Finn, telling him that Cole fixed everything here.Someonemight not have thought to tell him that, so instead of feeling like I’m stalking him, I figure I’m just keeping him updated on what’s going on. The text ends up being a whole paragraph long, informing him that I’m back at my apartment and that I’m going to work at the bank tomorrow. Instead of worrying about how to end the message, I just hit Send, cringing when the whole block of text comes up.
I nibble over my bottom lip reading through all the heartfelt messages he’d sent me. When I get to my huge paragraph, I read over what I sent and realize I didn’t explain anything to him. Nothing.
I swallow the fear down and start again.
I miss Max.
And you.
I hope you’re coming home soon, Finn. And that you’ll want to see me when you get here.
For the rest of the night, my phone sits on the table by my bed. I keep glancing at it, and it’s worse than waiting for a pot of water to boil. I will the phone to give me that shrill tone that alerts me that I have a message, but it never comes.
Jaz tries to draw me out of my room a little later with the idea of us all watching a movie together but I decline. “Babe,” she frowns. “You okay?”
I nod. “Just want to be alone. You know?”
“I can get rid of Jared,” she offers.
“It’s not even that,” I tell her. She gives me a doubtful look, and I smirk. “I promise. If it was, I would tell you. I just really want to be alone. We’ll head into work together tomorrow though?”
“You got it.”
Right before I go to sleep, I check my phone to make sure I didn’t miss anything, and sure enough, not one single alert.
I sigh, set my alarm, and then turn over, shoving the pillow under my head so I can hopefully get some rest.
You’d think because I grew up in the Heights that I’d be used to disappointment. And I am. Just not one as big as this.