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The passenger door opens, and a second cop approaches my window. Something about him seems familiar.

“Dimitri?”

Oh, holy hell. It’s Scott, the groom—who married Tawny, who didn’t even have cake at his wedding. He’s a cop? He’s also on the Italian mob’s payroll. Thank God. Or Satan. At this point, I don’t care.

He swallows a laugh. “Would you like a police escort to your kid’s school?”

“Yes, please.”

The world considers Russia to be a backwards place stuck in a lost time of long ago… but America is fucking weird.

Chapter

Thirty-Six

Dimitri

Ten minutes later, I’m pulling up to the front of the school, the police waving as they drive off. I sprint to the front door and jab the intercom button. I know they’re doing a full-body scan to match my identity—Mastodon upgraded the school’s security after the incident at Family Day when they let a stalker kidnap Ian. He thought he was grabbing Drew, but apparently he was too stupid to recognize his own kid. The whole thing was a fucking mess and they refunded my tuition for the month. Well, refunded Alana since she’s paying for Ian’s first three years of school. After that I’ll start paying the bill.

A woman with a tight bun and lipstick too bright for her face opens the door. “Hello, Mr. Johnson. How can we help you?”

I lift the bag. “Ian left this at home. He took mine by mistake.”

She nods and smiles, blissfully unaware of the contents currently in her school. She seems happy just to handle a low-effort task. Walking to the phone, she calls into Ian’s classroom.

A few minutes later, Ian bounds into the front office. “Hi.” Relief hits me instantly when I take my bag from him.

“You might need this.” I hand him the navy blue backpack.

He looks at it, confused, and furrows his brows. “I thought something was weird today.”

Under the watchful eyes of the office staff, I ask, “Did you look inside?”

His shoulders give a slight shrug. “No, my books are already in my desk, and I’m buying lunch this week.”

THANK GOD. AND THE DEVIL. AND EVERY OTHER DEITY WHO INTERVENED.

He frowns. “But Maria did. She was looking for colored pencils.”

Son of a bitch.

Ian continues, oblivious. “I thought something was up when she couldn’t find any, but then again, it’s Maria. She couldn’t find an elephant if it were standing in front of her.”

“Be nice.”

He seems unfazed as he takes his bag from me. “Maria’s great. She’s the Michelangelo of our group. I’m Raphael, Drew’s Donatello, and obviously Shae is Leonardo.”

He really needs better role models than martial arts reptiles, but his answer gives me pause. “Why are you Raphael? Besides the fact that he’s your favorite. Drew seems more like Raph to me.”

Ian hitches his bag over his shoulder. “No, I’ve had way more trauma. I get to be the cool one." He hugs me before heading back to class. “See you at home.”

More trauma? I knew it was bad, but I didn’t know how bad until now.

The women in the office smile collectively, saying things like, “He’s come so far,” and, “You must be so proud of him.”

“I am.” Ian’s incredible. I’m the fuck-up.

I get back in the car, not even realizing where I’m going until I’m in the parking lot of Mastodon Securities. I shouldn’t go in,but my body isn’t listening to my brain. Before I know it, I’m walking through the front door.