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And I wish you could call me and tell me how to go on. Instead I’ve got to fumble through life without you.
I will never understand why you did what you did, and it will never be okay.
But I’m going to have to try to be okay.
I realize that if I’m going to write everything down, like I’m supposed to, it’d never fit in a letter. It’d have to be more like a whole book. A book about a girl who wanted to save the world but only ended up saving herself.
It doesn’t sound like much of an accomplishment, does it? But maybe that’s all anyone’s really able to do anyway. Oh, Claire, I wish you could’ve saved yourself. I wish you had chosen to live.
The world is smaller without you in it. It’s also worse.
But I’m going to try to make it better, for others, and for myself.
I miss you. I love you.
Forever and always,
your little sister