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And against my better judgment, the words tumbled from my lips anyway. ‘I was hired by the
owner of a sex club in Copenhagen to take shots for her revamped website.’
Her smile turned a little wicked. ‘A different sort of adventure, then?’
I didn’t return her smile. ‘An enlightening one, yes.’
Slowly, her smile switched off, her face getting serious. ‘How personal?’
‘Helga, the owner of the club, became my first Dominant. She took one look at me and she knew.’
‘How old were you?’
‘Twenty-four.’
Something close to envy flashed in her eyes. ‘How long did it last?’
‘Six months.’ I let out a wry smile. ‘Then she moved on to somebody else.’
Sympathy shone in Graciela’s eyes. ‘She broke your heart?’
I shook my head. ‘I thought so at the time, but in hindsight she was breaking down my barriers so I could accept myself.’
Graciela nodded, understanding brimming in her eyes. ‘Why does that make you sad?’
‘Because even after all of that I was still searching.’
‘Searching or denying?’
I shrugged, the memory painful to vocalise. It’d been both. After the nightmare of my father, and the need to take control and keep my mother and sister safe from his abuse, surrendering that control had felt like a betrayal. One I’d struggled with for years before accepting the freedom of submission.
‘So she was your first. Who was your second?’ she asked after swallowing a mouthful of wine.
Shit, it looked as if we were doing this after all. ‘No one memorable.’
One sleek eyebrow arched. ‘Your third? Fourth or fifth?’
‘All imitations of the real thing that have disappointed more than satisfied. Till...recently.’
She gave a soft gasp. ‘Jensen...are you saying...?’
Fuck, I didn’t want things to slip into hot and heavy territory, didn’t want this perfect flow we’d found to hit the skids. But she was looking at me, expectant. And I was helpless to deny her any damn thing.
‘You’re the first to make a meaningful impression since Helga? The verdict is still out.’
She looked a little...relieved, and my stomach churned.
Damn, maybe I’d laid it on too thick?
Dial it back a notch, Jensen.
She held the glass against her lips, eyes spearing into me. ‘Tell me about Stephanie.’
Fuck no.
‘Graciela...’
She reached out, laid her hand over my arm. ‘It’s not an order. I just really want to know.’