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I mean, there is no possible way I could take him home to Dad. His health is improving, but I keep playing out the scenario in my head.
“Hi, Levi, if you want to see my daughter again, you have some apologizing to do,” Dad would say.
“You mean apologizing for catching her cheating on me?”
Then Dad would turn his face to me, and I’d have to meet his disgusted look head on.
“You cheated? Then lied about it?”
I can’t do it.
And because I’m almost certain Levi isn’t serious about us—I mean, why is he keeping us from his family? It’s not worth thinking about.
I figure one of us will end things eventually.
My feelings are growing for him exponentially and it’s messing me up right now. After that moment in the kitchen when I swore I saw deep into his heart, we’ve just gone back to banging one another.
It’s time to accept that I’ve fallen head over stupid heels in love with him. And no one knows.
I can’t tell Steph.
I can’t talk to Mom.
I definitely can’t tell Dad. I’m grateful he’s still with us, especially this time of year, so I will not upset him. Not when Levi isn’t speaking up...except to invite me to his house for a mind-blowing orgasm or three.
These last few weeks, hearing everyone making plans for Thanksgiving with their partners, and reminding myself that Levi is not my boyfriend, has been hard.
He hasn’t brought it up at all.
Like last time, he’s excluding me from family events, and it hurts.
I toss back my drink.
“That’s awesome.” I lie and lift my hand to the bartender, ordering another round. “You should marry him.”
Steph is silent.
“You okay?” she finally asks.
I rear back way too dramatically. “Totally. Just saying. Richard sounds awwesssome.”
Okay, so I might be a little drunk tonight. I’m on my third, no fourth drink, and they are sliding down just nicely.
Steph sips her drink and watches me.
“I could be your bridesmaid. Oh wait. Would you marry here or in Eng Land?”
“England. It’s pronounced England.” She frowns.
“Oh sorry. I speak American.” I shrug.
“What is wrong with you?” She pushes her drink away.
“Nothing. I’m planning your wedding.” I pick up my freshly delivered drink and as the glass touches my lips, Stephanie grabs my hand, and it splashes everywhere. “Hey!”
“You’ve had enough. Since when are you a mean drunk?”
Since I fell in love with Levi Montgomery.