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I take a seat next to him at the table and pick up the deck of cards in front of him, shuffling idly. “Well, I learned you have a big dick, so congrats on that.”

Matt throws back his head and laughs as Salem mutters, “Jesus Christ, Evie.”

“What?” I ask innocently. “You should be proud. Jenna was definitely proud.”

“Please can we not talk about my dick?”

“If I had to hear about your dick, I think you should have to hear about your dick.”

“Do youwantto talk about my dick?”

Fair question. “No, I really do not.”

“That’s what I thought. Now pass the chips.”

I rip open the bag, help myself to a nice, greasy handful, and hand it over.

“You know,” he says as he digs through it until he finds a perfect whole chip, “it’s kind of like I called your bluff right there. I feel like this can only mean good things for the game ahead.”

“Sure, that plus my beginner’s luck being over,” I say with a flutter of my lashes.

“Oh, you know what?” he says with a grin that definitely means trouble. “I forgot—Matt and I came up with theperfect next task for your Bad Girl list. Community service got me inspired.”

“Let me guess.” I grab back the bag and take another chip. “You want me to burn down the forest?”

“Of course not,” Salem says with a snort. He glances up at Matt, who comes over and drops a box on the table in front of me. “We wantyouto refill the condom stash.”

Chapter Thirteen

IMAY NOT HAVE BEEN UPfor Truth or Dare in the woods, but I am absolutely kicking ass at the Badass Treasure Hunt list devised and financed by Matt and Salem. It helps that I’ve brought a backpack, so no one else on Camden’s Target shuttle will have to see what I’m carrying back. Oh, and that I’m wearing dark sunglasses, so I don’t have to make eye contact with anyone. But still! I’m doing it!

Condoms? Check.

Lube? Flavoredandunflavored.

Tampons? Okay, not exactly a “badass” thing, but Salem did point out that he would not be playing midnight messenger boy again, and those Lockwood tampons are the awful cardboard kind.

And finally, the most badass item of them all (but only because I flat-out refused to attempt to buy a vibrator at Target): snacks.

When I’ve finished filling my basket, I rest it on the floor and take a picture for Matt and Salem, making sure the copious amounts of condoms and lube are highly visible. “Who’s a good girl now?” I mutter as I shift to get it from different angles.

“Am I interrupting something?”

The surprise of Heather Cherette’s voice in my ear has me dropping my phone into the basket, and I carefully retrieve it from the condom-box nest. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” she says, glancing down at the basket, her eyes widening.

“I didn’t see you on the shuttle.” I debate covering up the contents of my basket, but I suspect that ship has sailed. I settle for taking off my sunglasses instead, so I look like slightly less of a weirdo.

“Yeah, I made it at the last second. Realized I could use a few things.”

Reflexively, I glance at her basket. It’s completely empty.

“Right,” she says, her cheeks flushing pink. “So, I’m having some trouble pickingoutthose things, and you seem…” Her eyes flicker to my basket, then back up. “Um. Could you help me, maybe?”

It takes me a full minute to figure out what she’s asking, and when I do, I think I might throw up right there at the corner of aisle 9.

“Condoms,” I choke out. “You wantmyhelp buying condoms?”

Her cheeks get even redder as she nods. “And Plan B, maybe? Not that I need it,” she says quickly. “I just think it’d be good to have.”