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“Actually, all I said was that Ihadbaked goods,” I correct, just to be annoying. Still, I hand over a couple of chocolate chip cookies I made in my first meeting of Baking Club the day before, keeping one for myself. “Now, Iamvery proud of you for studying, but we also need to work on these music choices. There is no way this does not make your parents cringe themselves into the ground, and there’salsono way any girl in her right mind would wanna come back here and make out to this.”

He takes a bite of his cookie and silently says “I have made out to this song a million times” with his arched eyebrow.

“Liar,” I mutter as I take a seat at his desk, and he justshrugs, which is extra annoying because there is no way Salem has actually ever tolerated someone’s presence (and vice versa) long enough to make out with them, let alone to this soundtrack. I can’t even physicallyimaginehim kissing someone. Like, where would he put his hands? Everywhere seems too gentle and intimate for someone who uses pocket knives as fidget spinners and listens to metal loud enough to wake the dead, though I admit he is pretty dexterous with a basketball, and— Wait,whyam I imagining Salem’s lips and hands exploring anyone, anyway?

I take a sanity-preserving bite of cookie before continuing my thought. “Anyway, only listening to old music makes you seem like you’re not open to new things and experiences. There’s something so dreary about acting like nothing new can be cool. You don’t wanna be that guy.”

“I am absolutely happy to be that guy.”

“Hey, you asked for my help,” I can’t resist reminding him, even though he’s clearly been sorry about that fact every single minute of every single day since.

“Stick with providing sustenance.” He swallows down the last chocolatey bite. “I might need to join Baking Club.”

Okay, that might be even harder to picture than—

Nope, still harder to picture Salem with his tongue in a girl’s mouth.

Again,notpicturing Salem with his tongue in a girl’s mouth.

What was I here to talk about again?

Oh right. Me.

“Anyway, no thanks to you, I locked in a talent-show ideaI think you’re going to like very much.” At least if Isabel wears the kind of outfit she’s planning to. “But it’s kind of cheesy and I need you to help me make it cool.”

“I’m really starting to think there’s not one thing I could do to make you cool. Where did you even get the idea that being in the talent show was somehow a badass thing to do?”

“I had a different initial vision,” I admit, “but it went off the rails kind of quickly when I was talking to Isabel. Who, by the way, will be my partner for this, so you may actually want to be nice to me.”

“You know you entirely invented my interest in her, right?”

I roll my eyes. “Yeah, okay. Like you don’t literally improve your posture in her presence.”

“It’s instinct!”

“I’ll bet it is. Anyway, you’re supposed towantto help me, the way I want to help you. I’m starting to think I’ve gotten the rotten end of this deal.”

“You?” He snorts. “I’m the one who has my phone going off fifty times a day with reminders to brush my teeth or call home.”

“Yeah, and your breath smells better and your mom is happier!”

“My breath smelled fine before!”

It did—he pops Tic Tacs pretty constantly, I suspect to annoy people with the noise—but that isn’t the point. “Well, I bet your dental hygiene is better now, and you’re welcome for that.”

“You also took my weed and lighter, didn’t you.”

I did in fact sneak it out of his room on Saturday night;I’ve been wondering how long it would take him to figure that out. “I’m doing you a favor—now you can’t smokeandyou won’t accidentally burn down the entire dorm because you were bored one night.”

I can’t make out any words in his grumbling of a response, but given there’s no fight about it, he seems to agree.

Or has more stashed somewhere.

“You can’t make me sound like some uptight pain in the ass when you asked for this,” I remind him firmly.

“Technically,Iasked for someone to cover for me to keep me out of trouble. It wasyouridea to just… keep me out of trouble. And it’s making things very boring.”

“Boring is good when your idea of exciting is getting high in your principal’s office,” I counter as I hop up from the chair and head to the door, “but you don’t want my help? That’s fine. Something tells me I’ll be just fine without yours.” The whole idea was stupid anyway. It might’ve worked with Matt, but Salem was never gonna care about anyone other than himself.