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I kiss her harder.

I let her pull me into the lie that we’re still together.

And I let myself believe it.

I am a fool.

I am already lost because I love her too much to let go.

Even when I know she is already gone.

And I might die for it.

Gladly.

44

NAIRA

Ishould have left him in the dark.

I should have done it fast. Without hesitation. Without looking back.

I should have made it painless.

But that was never my way, was it?

No.

I was always meant to destroy him.

He let me shred him to pieces.

He’s still sleeping when I stand over him. The fire has burned down to embers, a dull glow casting his face in deep shadows.

He looks different like this.

Less of the monster I first met.

Less of the warlord who put his hands around my throat and dragged me into his world.

Less of the man who ruined me.

And more of something else.

He’s somewhat breakable. Something I should want to protect.

Something I should still love.

Not anymore.

He doesn’t matter in the bigger span of things.

I am not the woman who once burned for him.

That woman died somewhere between the dagger and the hunger, between the curse and the relic, between the last time he kissed me and the last time I let him.

That woman is gone. Over.