Page 183 of Celestial Combat
“I’ve missed that version of us too,” he said, brushing a strand of hair from my cheek.
I exhaled softly and pressed a kiss to his jaw, lingering just a moment longer than necessary. “It’s stupid, but I already can’t wait to be home.”
“To my prison in Brooklyn?”
“Hey, I love your place! That was before we got along.”
He laughed under his breath, hand tightening on my hip. “Yeah, right.”
I laughed, smacking his chest lightly.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” he said, eyes still on the ceiling,
A small hum of acknowledgment left me.
“Why were you so distant from Trevor and your parents before this trip?”
I hesitated. My instinct was to dodge. To brush it off with something shallow and sarcastic, something that made me seem untouchable.
“I know it can’t just be because you didn’t go to Columbia like your brother.”
Zane had this way of looking at me – not just seeing me, butfeelingme. Like he was willing to hold whatever I handed him.
So I swallowed, and let the memories loosen in my chest.
“When I was little,” I began, “Our parents moved us to Tokyo for a while. Because the tabloids back in New York were crazy at the time. And I remember… The mansion in Tokyo felt different. Too quiet. Too big. We had a nanny then. I can barely remember her face now, but she was kind. Gentle. She made me feel… Safe. I was maybe six? Trevor around ten.”
I blinked slowly, trying to summon the memory, but it was already dissolving, like ink in water.
“One night, I heard screaming,” I said, voice softer now. “I didn’t know what was going on, but I rushed down the stairs anyways. There was… A man. Dead on the floor in the foyer. My nanny was there, along with my parents, Trevor and some other soldiers form the family I think. And they were all perfectly fine, except for my nanny. Who looked obviously distressed.”
I paused. My throat felt tight.
“Still… When they finally saw me on the stairs, she tucked me into my room and told me everything was going to be okay. That it wasn’t what it looked like. And then… I never saw her again.”
I felt Zane tense slightly under me.
“When I asked, they told me she was just an imaginary friend. That I made her up. And a week later, we were suddenly back in New York. No explanation.”
I took a deep breath.
“What did Trevor say?”
“He said he didn’t know what I was talking about. That he didn’t remember. But I knew he did.” I paused, regaining my composure. “I asked him about it again a few years ago, and we got into this huge fight over it. We haven’t talked about it since.”
Zane finally turned toward me then, his hand brushing my cheek, his touch so gentle it felt like it might unravel me.
“I think that was the moment I stopped trusting them,” I whispered. “They all gaslighted me. And…Her.”
I sighed heavily, staring at the ceiling. The pink and red sunset skies outside.
“Her name was Yui,” I said suddenly, the words escaping my lips like a confession.
Harmony.
“She’d always sing this traditional Japanese song that I can’t remember the name of or words to…”
I closed my eyes, and the sound came back to me like water through a wall – distant, warbled, but still there. I began to hum. Just a few notes.
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