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“It’s not.”

“Why?”I bit out.

“Because I lied,” Lucifer said casually as he placed Mini on the seat behind him and stood as well.

“You what?”My ears started ringing, and my head spun as I struggled to drag in my next breath.

“Jagger, my brother, you have to know I have no sway when it comes to that shit.That’s the fates’ business, and I can’t meddle with that.”He shrugged again.“Back then, the state you were in, I told you what you needed to hear.”

I ran a hand down my face.“You can’t be fucking serious?”

His expression hardened.I’d veered into disrespectful and needed to get my shit under control, but it wasn’t easy.

“I did what I had to.You were ineffective in that condition.You’ve enjoyed five hundred years of ignorant bliss, plenty of time to get yourself prepared for this.”

“I haven’t prepared for it, because I didn’t think it would ever happen,” I ground out.

“Your mated brothers seem happy.”He picked up his beer.“I lied to you because I had to.You have a problem with the mate the fates chose for you, take it up with them.Now if you’ll excuse me—” He stood and strode off to join his guests in the other room.

Take it up with the fates?That wasn’t how this worked.

They didn’t change their minds.

I walked out, back into the caves, my mind racing.

Sutton was my mate.Of course she fucking was.Of course, she’d been right.

What the fuck was I going to do?

Mating Sutton would mean releasing the last of the emotion I was still holding back, releasing all that pain, experiencing it all over again.And worse, it would mean feeling all of it while I helplessly watched her grow old and eventually die.

Witches weren’t immortal, and Sutton’s witch blood was predominant, despite the way she transformed.Hounds could sense immortality, and she wasn’t.Her life was finite.Lucifer wouldn’t just give her immortality, either, not like he had for War.I didn’t have anything to barter like he had had.And unlike Relic and Dirk, my mate wasn’t already immortal.

I wouldn’t survive making her mine, allowing myself to love her, like I had that tiny pup, only to lose her.

I couldn’t watch her age and weaken.I couldn’t hold her in my arms while she slipped away.

Knowing I would eventually lose her, I’d always be holding a part of myself back, trying to protect myself from that pain, and she’d resent me for it.

Sutton deserved a mate who could give her everything she wanted.A male who could give her healthy pups and a family.

A primal roar burst inside me.

I could never give her that, and my need to protect her—from me—was just as strong as my need to make her mine.

ChapterNine

Sutton

I lookedup as Magnolia walked into the clinic for her shift.There were only so many healers in the city, and we all kind of did a rotation.

The witch was an exceptional healer, and a friend; she was also the alpha hellhound’s sister-in-law.I’d been avoiding the clubhouse even though Fern had assured me that Jagger had gone back to Hell for an unspecified amount of time.

I was glad.It didn’t hurtat all, and I’d keep telling myself that until it stuck.Him leaving again just made it easier for me to forget about that jerk.

“How was your shift?”she asked as I slung my bag over my shoulder.

“The wolf shifter in room seven threw his pudding at me, so that was fun.Apparently, he doesn’t like pudding.”