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I abandon my plans for now and lie down, pulling her with me. It’s new territory—I’ve never handled the aftermath like this. All my previous partners were experienced women.
“Did I hurt you?”
She doesn’t open her eyes. “No. I just...I’m not ready to come back to reality yet.”
“Hang on a second.”
I head into the bathroom and take care of the condom. After washing up, I think about bringing her a damp towel, but I suspect that’s not what she wants or needs right now. What she might need is for me to walk a road I’ve never been on—comfort and affection.
I return to the bed and see her lying on her side. She looks like a painting: pale skin against my black sheets, red hair tumbling down her back. I fit myself against her from behind, holding her.
“Doesn’t this go against your no-strings policy, us lying together like this?” she asks.
“I don’t have that many rules.”
“But you have some.”
“Not about what just happened with us.”
“What does that mean?”
“I’ve never been with anyone this young.”
She turns in my arms. “You didn’t . . .you...?” I can see the uncertainty on her face.
“Yes, I came really hard,” I say, relishing how her cheeks turn pink. “I want you to stay all weekend.”
“I need to go home.”
“Why?”
She doesn’t answer.
I hold her chin, making her look at me. “Look me in the eye.” I wait until she does. “Why do you need to go home?”
“I don’t, really. I just don’t like staying out.”
“That’s not it.”
“What do you think it is, then?” she asks, though we both know the answer.
“You’re scared.”
“I’m not afraid of anything.”
“You’re afraid of how I make you feel,” I say, because she might try hard to hide it, but I can read her completely.
“No,” she says, getting up and heading to the shower. When she reaches the door, she glances back. “I’m not afraid of anything.”
* * *
Taylor
I’m still shaking as I turn on the shower for the second time today in his suite. I let the water pour over my head, fighting the urge to grab my clothes and run.
I knew that the moment he touched me, I’d be lost, but I had no idea making love with William would leave me in the kind of panic I’m feeling right now.
At twenty-three, I’m suddenly sure not only that I’m in love but that I’ve found the man I want to be with forever. And he’s as distant from my world as a trip to the moon.