Page 100 of A Scottish Teashop in Napoli

‘You may well ask what makes Mozzarella Moretti so special that we have decided to stock it here, at Sarastro & Salieri?’

Shrieks of laughter rose from the guests as a montage of video clips flashed across a screen to music.

‘As you see, these are not your average buffalo – these buffalo enjoy opera, jazz, massage, water beds, swimming, having their teeth brushed and being hugged. Now, let’s take you to where the magic happens…’

The scene cut to a close-up of a pair of white galoshes striding across a tiled floor to a huge vat of creamy milk.

‘What turnsthatintothis?’he said, a porcelain white sphere of creamy mozzarella decorated with verdant basil, fat scarlet tomatoes and glistening olive oil flashing onto the screen. ‘It’s all down to these guys – themastri casari.’

Onto the screen popped a huddle of grinning faces, wearing hairnets and brandishing wooden paddles.

Cut to a pair of bronzed hands pulling, stretching and kneading the ribbony mozzarella.

‘These are some of the best cheesemakers in Italy. But don’t just take my word for it,’ he said, opening the blinds and nodding towards a group of uniformed waiting staff, balancing silver trayspiled high withbocconcini. ‘Here we have some mozzarella and tomato bites for you to taste.Buon appetito!’

Elena could hardly wait for the applause to die down before diving in. She was ravenous, having not eaten all day due to nerves.

‘Grazie,’ she said, cramming twobocconciniinto her mouth. Her concern that the mozzarella would lose its fluffiness in transit melted away with each mouthful.

‘Elena?’

She spun around.

‘Hi. Remember me?’

Elena squinted, a puzzled look spreading across her face.

‘It’s Jamie. Lucy’s brother?’

‘Of course,’ she spluttered incoherently. ‘I didn’t recognise you without your beard – and your bagpipes. Oops.’ She quickly covered her mouth. Too late. A spray of tomato juice had already escaped and was splattered across Jamie’s dazzlingly white shirt.

‘Sorry.’ She squirmed, attempting to mop up the blood-red stain with a tissue. ‘Hi.’

‘Hi.’

Jamie brushed her hamster-like cheek with a kiss, eyes aglow with amusement.

Elena grabbed a glass of wine from a passing tray in an attempt to wash down the stack of food now lodged in her throat.

‘You okay?’

Elena nodded through a blur of tears and made a dash for the ladies, choking as she went.

She emerged a few minutes later to find Jamie waiting for her with a tumbler of water and a wide smile.

‘I thought I was going to have to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on you. Let’s start again, shall we? Hi. I’m Jamie. Lucy’s brother.’

‘Elena.Piacere.Nice to meet you – in person.’

‘Cheers.’

‘Salute.’

‘You spoke really well. Giancarlo would be very proud, I’m sure.’

Elena blinked, swallowed hard and turned her head away. ‘Grazie.’

For a second or two there was silence.