Page 16 of Zachary (Gentlemen of War #3)

Zachary

Stepping inside the house, I stopped at the mezzanine windows and watched as Eveline took her son by the hand and sauntered through the grassy field and toward the woods. Admittedly, I hadn’t been around many children before and, those I had, did not make an impression on me one way or another. But Patrick seemed markedly different, and I wasn’t entirely sure why.

It could be due to his association with Eveline, but he also showed peculiar resemblances to me and my own childhood… a curious childhood. I took note in the few times I have spoken to him how reserved and shy he appeared at the onset, then this desire to explore, touch, and discover emerged. He seems to know little of the world he lives in, but quite anxious to learn more.

I recalled the spark in his eyes when the butterflies landed on him, as if his world opened like a flower unfolding to the sun. And when I stood with him just now, my smile and laugh surfaced unrestrained. It had been ages since I felt such lighthearted sentiments.

I glanced down at my palm, the one that clasped Evie’s arm to keep her from falling when I swung around with an urge to apologize. The touch, so brief, it should not have imprinted so deeply. It wasn’t like I hadn’t touched her a thousand times as a child while swimming, fishing, hunting, climbing Cornelius, and even embracing in celebration on occasion, but now our touches seemed to signify a greater relevance, even the fleeting ones.

I continued to watch Patrick and Eveline out the window . How I torture myself so. Standing so close just now, breathing in her goodness and beauty, I deliberately clenched my hands behind my back to keep them from reaching out and pulling her to me. Despite, Lucas and Hunter’s insistence that I did not will her husband’s death, I still feared that I had induced far too much harm to repair. She may forgive me, but would she ever truly trust me again? Would she ever consider me a worthy protector of her heart?

And when she asked me to resume calling her Evie, my spirit lurched, drawn to her as if a string kept us tethered together despite the many reasons it should tear apart.

My thoughts flitted back to my conversation with my mates about love. If I didn’t know what love was, what was this raw, aching, unprecedented longing I was feeling?

I spent most of yesterday on a day long ride trying to gather my thoughts. Resisting alcohol was proving to be far more tormenting than I anticipated, though the suffering lessened when I was in nature without a bottle anywhere near me. I returned in time for dinner, but instead of watching these entitled fools clamber around Evie for her constant attention, I chose to spend it with Jaxon, who promised me he would join us this afternoon for the canoe rides on the pond.

After departing Jaxon’s room last night, I joined Lucas and Hunter in the study for an evening chat where Lucas inadvertently shared some devastating news with me. I recalled the conversation with perfect clarity.

“I have heard that Sir Charles intends to propose to Evie as early as next week.”

“Next week?” The words caught in my throat. “Has he truly reached that point in their courtship?”

Lucas shrugged his shoulders. “Not from what I have seen, but I’m not watching her all the time.”

Hunter joined in. “If anyone showed a propensity to propose I would prefer it be Sir Charles.”

My eyes widened as if I was not part of this conversation. “Pardon?” I cried.

“Well, if you refuse to be considered as a suitor.”

“I—I’m not.”

“Then why should it bother you so? It should not matter who asks for her hand.” Hunter sat back and crossed his ankle over his knee.

I rubbed the back of my neck. Of course it bothered me… it besieged me, but I said nothing in response.

“I’m only saying…” Hunter continued, “If she was to consider any of the men who are currently seeking her time, the only one who seems genuine in his efforts and treatment of her is Sir Charles.”

Though Sir Charles is a decent chap by gentlemen’s standards, I have seen him more than once gape at Evie like she’s a lavish accessory to be had. I am also quite aware that his financial future is in need of a wealthy connection to maintain his family estate and it irritated me so that he set his cap on Evie. While she would make any man happy without a shilling to her name, the addition of wealth has made her an unknowing target.

After leaving Lucas and Hunter, I slipped back into my bedchamber with a bottle of port.

I found keeping my promise to Jaxon proved to be an hourly struggle and my willpower lacked tremendously. Thoughts of Sir Charles proposing and Evie accepting distressed me. I found it simpler to drown out the exasperating voices than to live with them. Through providence’s mercy I fell asleep after the second glass. If not, I may not have found the will to cease on my own. Yet, guilt still found me upon waking, and I was reminded of why I consumed the draught in the first place. Sir Charles intends to propose.

I continued to watch Eveline from the window. She tickled Patrick’s nose with a long grass frond then ran ahead while he chased after her.

Did Eveline not believe she merited so much better than any of these men? After they misconstrued her archery ability, it seemed expedient they should acknowledge that Eveline is not a simpering miss, but one who can hold her own. She always has been. Will Sir Charles, or any other buffoon she says yes to, intend to snuff that out upon marriage?

Why did I care if another man showed interest?

Blast. I ran a hand through my hair. Because it would kill me to see her in any other man’s arms but mine!

“Lord Zachary?” Lady Victoria called from behind. While I acknowledge the attractive blonde had been a lovely distraction these last few days, I needed to cease my feigned attentions. “Are you well?” she asked as she arrived at my side. When I didn’t respond, she leaned forward and seemed to catch the same glimpse of Eveline and Patrick as they entered the woods.

“I cannot imagine rearing the child of my dead husband and his mistress,” she scoffed while wrapping an arm through mine. “Come, let’s go for a walk of our own.” She tried to tug me forward.

“Mrs. Turner has taken on an honorable charge,” I countered. “Both she and the child are innocent in all of this.”

“Yes, but to have the child be a constant reminder of why you could not please your husband, that would be dreadful—”

I cut her off. “—Do not speak about my friend in such a manner. You do not know her as I do.”

“Oh,” she placed a hand on her chest. “I did not know you were well acquainted with Mrs. Turner. I only presumed from your quarrel after the archery tournament that you were not amiable with one another.”

“We were neighbors.”

“Forgive me, Lord Zachary, I did not mean ill will.”

I patted her hand. “Do not fret, Lady Victoria.” I breathed slowly out my lips. The sooner I put Eveline out of my mind, the sooner I can resume my life. “Let us take in this beautiful autumn day and join the others outside.” I smiled as I led her down the stairs and out in a completely opposite direction from that of Eveline in search of the rest of the party. Distraction had become my saving grace and, as erroneous as it was, I still needed Lady Victoria for that very purpose.

Later that afternoon as we all gathered at the dock of Hunter’s substantial pond, which resembled more of a lake, I smiled in Jaxon’s direction as he appeared at his first outdoor activity with the party.

Despite my confession of mucking up our deal by drinking last night, he chose to engage and only encouraged me to persevere. He offered no condescension or judgement, which I sorely appreciated.

With six canoes tied up to the side of the dock, it was certain that more than just two people would be paired up if all present members were to enjoy the excursion. Patrick stood eagerly beside Eveline who did not glance in my direction, regardless of her assurances that she forgave me.

Both Sir Charles and Viscount Glade hovered nearby her, sure to be vying for the occasion to row her boat. I chuckled to myself as I visualized the two of them racing to be the first to persuade her into their vessel once permission was granted.

I should be happy for her to be receiving all this worthwhile attention, but it only seemed to aggravate me further.

“Lord Zachary,” Lady Victoria whispered at my side as Hunter announced a game in which all parties would compete.

“Whichever team successfully returns to the shore with the red sash that was retrieved from that tree branch…” Hunter pointed to a tree in the center of the pond. “Will be deemed the victors and be awarded a bounteous berry trifle.”

I looked down at the woman tugging my coat sleeve. “Yes, Lady Victoria?”

“Will you be my partner?” she asked.

I smiled gently. Now was a good a time as any to cease my insincere interest. I had taken my subterfuge too far. I did not want to elevate her hopes when I had no intention of seeking her hand.

“My apologies, Lady Victoria.” I frowned innocently, “I have already been assigned to Lady Genevieve and Miss Baker.”

The pretty blond pouted openly and jutted her chin upward as she marched over to Lord Trenton and applied her charms on him in an apparent ruse to induce a rise out of me. I found her behavior brought forth more relief than jealousy.

I knew being in the same boat with Lucas’ sister, Genevieve, proved safe. At twenty-two, she had cleverly managed to thwart all courtships contrived by her late father and now her older brother, Justin, with all manner of success. And although I always teased my best friend over how beautiful his three sisters were, especially Genie, it was always in jest. Lucas would never let me court her and truthfully, I had no intention, for she had become a good friend over the years.

As I readied my boat and removed my coat to allow for greater arm rotation, I risked a glance toward Eveline to see which one of the pompous peacocks triumphed over the other. Viscount Glade. Now I wished I had watched to see how it all played out.

“Lord Zachary,” Genevieve called, waiting for my hand to guide her inside the boat.

I smiled. “Forgive me,” I said as I held out my hand, first to her, then to Miss Baker.

Genie leaned forward as I took my place between the oars. “You know,” she muttered. “You could have always partnered with Evie.”

Though Eveline and Genie were closer in age than Lucas and me, the two girls remained acquaintances at best. I suspect part of the reason was due to Evie’s romping around the forest, behaving like a boy, and spending less time on her propriety and comportment. Had her mother known the types of activities she engaged in, she would have barred her from ever leaving the house. I chuckled at the memory and caught Genevieve’s scrutinizing eye. She knew me all too well.

I smiled broadly. “We are going to vanquish with fearless fortitude and be on our way to devouring a delicious dessert.”

Both women laughed at my dramatic announcement and settled in their seats.

When Helena dropped the handkerchief that signaled the beginning of the race, we were off. Me, Genevieve, and Miss Baker were in the first boat while Eveline, Patrick, and Viscount Glade were in the second. The third carried Hunter, Gwendolyn, and Jaxon followed by Lord Trenton, Lady Victoria, and Miss Angeline in the fourth and Justin, Edith, and Sir Charles in the fifth. Lucas, Roland, and the young boy, Joseph, brought up the rear in the sixth and final canoe.

The race began and though there was only one set of oars per canoe, some of the men switched off, whereas the ladies did not. As the teams neared the island where the red sash appeared tied to a weathered oak, one that inadvertently reminded me of Cornelius, the enthusiasm amongst the competing teams increased with each passing minute.

Both Patrick and Joseph in their separate boats responded to the growing excitement by jumping wildly in anticipation, as most young boys their ages would. Though I kept my focus forward and on the prize, I could not help but become a witness to what transpired nearby in Eveline’s boat. Despite the constant attempts Eveline made to persuade Patrick to settle down, her efforts were paltry because she enjoyed his exuberance far too much. The viscount seemed unamused at the boy’s energy and appeared to be slowly losing his patience.

Although last to leave, Lucas and Roland reached the island first as Joseph jumped from their boat and ran to retrieve the sash.

I turned to see Patrick leaping up and down with pleasure for his friend’s success when a series of fleeting events occurred so quickly one would not have time to process them all.

Viscount Glade reached for Patrick out of perceived vexation to force him to sit down and clawed at his shirt as Patrick then tried to jump out of his reach, stumbled backward and off the side of the boat. Eveline shrieked his name, and all eyes flashed in her direction. We followed her cries to the water where Patrick splashed in a frenzy. The viscount leaned over the edge of the boat with an oar but could not reach the child and that was when Evie jumped in.

Our boat and Lord Trenton’s were the closest to the viscount’s. I straightaway dove into the water and quickly swam to help the mother and child. I heard someone else jump in behind me but was unaware of who it was.

The water was not so deep for an adult, but for a child who did not swim it meant life or death. I reached the two just as Evie wrapped her arms around Patrick’s chest, attempting to keep herself afloat and his head above water, all while treading water in a mound of fabric.

“Here, let me take him,” I urged the moment I reached her side. I held Patrick above the water with one arm encircled around his stomach, while my other clutched Eveline’s waist, keeping her afloat until Jaxon arrived. My closest mate didn’t say a word and, with both hands, swooped in and took control of Patrick, swimming toward the island, which was easier to reach than the boat at this point. This now allowed me to fully assist Eveline. She tried swimming, but her dress held enormous weight. From her expression, it appeared as though she had considered divesting herself of the blasted thing; something she would surely regret once she was out of the water and standing only in her shift and stays.

“Allow me to help, please?” I asked while bobbing above the water. With my height, I reached the floor of the pond before she did.

She nodded as she warily glanced at the distance that was growing between us and her son. I reached beneath the water, assessing where her knees might be, gathered her skirts as best I could, and lifted her upward and into my arms, securing her against my chest.

I pushed forward through the water and its challenging resistance. Evie’s dress seemed to carry more water than a sponge, making the task proceed at a turtle’s pace. I finally reached the dirt and grass and set Evie down beside her shivering, wet son, who she promptly wrapped her arms around.

Jaxon had dropped to his knees nearby in exhaustion. This could very well be the most he has exerted himself since returning to Britain.

I crouched before Evie. “Are you alright?” I asked, searching subtly for any injuries to her person, then scanned Patrick in the same manner.

Eveline seized several intense breaths. “I’m fine, thank you.” She blinked rapidly as droplets cascaded from her eyelashes down her cheeks. “Thank you so much.”

Our eyes met and a memory sparked. We had been in this situation before. Twice . Both of us drenched to the bone, though, at the time, the lighthearted event was followed up with a delightful laugh.

This one wasn’t.

Turning my attention to Patrick, I brushed his long, wet bangs off his face. “Are you okay, little man?” I asked as he sniffled into his wet sleeve. Certainly, his tears were mixed with pondwater. The event had frightened him. It frightened me . He nuzzled his face into Eveline’s side as she tightened her hold on him and drew him to her chest.

Joseph ran to Patrick’s other side and patted him sympathetically on the arm, then tied the winning sash around his friend’s wrist. It was such a tender offering in his moment of strife. Lucas and Roland arrived close behind. “Is everyone alright?” Lucas asked as he removed his coat and placed it around the trembling mother and son. I had left my coat on the dock and, even if I hadn’t, a wet garment would have done them little good.

“What happened?” Jaxon asked when he finally caught his breath.

I glanced at Evie to see if she would tell the whole of it. If the viscount had not been so rough with Patrick this would have never happened. But I knew she was too kind to lay blame.

“Patrick fell in, and I followed him.”

Lucas chuckled. “The maternal instinct.”

She smiled back. It became quite apparent in that simple exchange how much being a mother meant to her.

I stood before them, drenched and dripping, but my only thought was how my newest desire centered on nothing more than to keep Eveline and Patrick safe. And that realization did not arrive quietly. My heart pounded my confirmation deafeningly in my ears.

I peered over toward the water just as the boat the viscount rowed arrived to shore a few steps away. I looked at both Eveline and Patrick and glanced up at Lucas. “I think it would be wise, Luke, if you took these two back with you. Roland and Joseph can ride with the viscount.”

Eveline stared at me in a way that led me to believe she knew I witnessed the event. It would remain a secret between us… for now. She wiped her eyes. “Yes, I would appreciate that.”

Lucas helped her to her feet as she offered me one more look of appreciation and wrapped an arm around Patrick as they walked to Luke’s boat.

Viscount Glade said not a word as Roland and Joseph stepped inside his boat. I walked over to them. “I need a ride back to my boat.” My demand intimated reasons for more than simply requesting a ride. I could not curb the frustration that burned within me.

Once inside, I let Roland take the lead, while I spoke quietly and firmly to the viscount. “If you are foolish enough to continue a courtship with Mrs. Turner, I will tell you now that you must mend your ways and your intentions best be honorable.” I stared unrelenting at the pompous halfwit. “If you cannot appreciate the value of the boy in her life, bow out now. Patrick is her son.”

Viscount Glade hissed, licking his wounded ego. “He is the by-blow of a mistress and requires strict discipline.”

I reached out and gripped the front of the man’s cravat, pulling him closer, fighting my desire to throw him out of the boat myself. “He is her child, and you will treat him as such, or you will answer to me.”

Viscount Glade only narrowed his eyes and, fortunately, did not say another word. When we reached alongside Genevieve and Miss Baker, I hopped out of the men’s boat and back to mine as they swiftly departed.

“Are Evie and Patrick alright, Zach?” Genevieve asked with wide eyes.

I sighed. “They are now.”

She patted my arm. “That was brave of you to help.” She chuckled. “Viscount Glade appeared as though he didn’t want to lift a finger to assist. Heaven forbid he gets his hair wet.”

I smiled but remained silent as I rowed toward the dock.

I only knew, without a sliver of doubt, that my heart was sure and forever spoken for… and I didn’t know what to do with that overpowering realization.