Page 47

Chapter 46

Brooks

Watching Lia meet Willow is one of my favorite interactions to date.

“I love you. I mean, I don’t love you. I don’t know you. It’s your music. All of it. I love it. Big fan. Sorry. Like, for making it weird or annoying or—” Her words run over each other and Willow gets her to stop talking by wrapping Lia in a hug.

I’ve met Willow a few other times, mostly in the Cosmos suite, and she’s one of the nicest people. It’s refreshing for someone like her—who has won every award and is one of the most successful artists of our time—to be so genuine and kind.

Lia looks at me, mouthing “OH MY GOD” as Willow hugs her and I can’t help but smile at my girl. Her excitement makes this all worth it. She’s not someone who thinks she’s owed something, and it makes all the difference.

We’re standing at the bar getting drinks. Willow and Tripp rented out Oasis for after the concert. It’s all friends, family, and concert staff letting loose and having some fun. Willow is going on a break after tonight, so it’s a little more laid back than a typical afterparty.

Willow invites Lia back to the table with her and Emilie. I nod, encouraging Lia to go as I wait for my drink.

“Hey Siri, play ‘U Got It Bad’ by Usher,” Clayton shouts playfully into his phone .

“That’s how you repay me? I suggest your bar for a once-in-a-lifetime dinner, and you’re busting my balls?” I shout. He reaches out for a high five and I give him one, laughing him off.

“Oh, come on. I’m just kidding. Well… I mean, I’m not, but we can pretend if that makes you feel better.” He shakes a drink and winks at me. “But this is pretty cool. Thanks for telling Zack about this place. Also, he likes the peanut butter whisky drink.”

I scrunch my face in disgust. “That doesn’t surprise me.”

“So…you’re head over heels with the woman you saved from that dickhead? How did that happen?”

It’s not even worth arguing with him; plus, he isn’t wrong. “It’s a long story, and one that isn’t public.”

Clayton presses his lips together and stares pointedly at me.

“Text me what nights you’re free and we can go out for a drink. I’ll tell you what I can,” I suggest. A line starts to form at the b ar and Clayton is already pulling away from me, about to start taking orders.

He grins and says, “You got it. Thanks again for coming in, man. Good to see you.”

I walk back to the table and sit next to Zack, who is arguing with Tripp about some trick play in the Cosmos playbook. Lia sits with Willow and Emilie, laughing, pink-cheeked and fucking gorgeous.

Looking out the window, I see fat snowflakes falling. It’s as if Lia knows what I’m thinking, because her eyes find mine and I mouth, “pool night” while pointing to the window. She turns, sees the flurries, and mouths, “yes.”

Tonight has been fun, but I’m excited to get home. I’ve got plans with my girl.

The first snow of the season falls heavy and thick, quickly accumulating. The roads were slippery enough to drive slower than normal. We get back home and I use the app to pull the pool cover off—it’s one of the things I thought I’d never use in the house.

Home.

Lia makes this place feel like a home. It’s the way she likes to sit down and plan meals for the nights we’ll be together. Or how she smiles getting blankets out from the dryer, immediately finding me to wrap us up while it’s still warm.

And that is fucking scary. This whole arrangement is supposed to be temporary. Soon, her apartment will be finished, and she’ll go back living there and it will only be me and Rocky. I swear, his butt wags more when she walks in the door than I do—the dog will be crushed.

My therapy session highlights replay in my brain. I can’t necessarily control this whole situation, but I can be open. I can do that. I can tell her.

Fuck. Why do I feel like I’m at the top of a rollercoaster about to drop?

Lia comes down wrapped in a towel, her hair in a messy bun. Her eyes gleam when she says, “Well, I still don’t have a bathing suit.”

“Oh, what a shame,” I reply sarcastically. “How will I ever recover?”

She gives me a quick kiss while she walks past me. The towel is wrapped up, covering her chest, but when she’s in front of me, I can see her back is red—broken out in a rash, or hives, or something.

“Babe, your back,” I exclaim. “What’s wrong?”

Her hand reaches back, touching the top of her shoulder. All it does is enhance the contrast between the skin on her hand and the agitation on her back. I step closer, putting my hands lightly on it, the bumps rough under my fingers.

“Oh, it’s not a big deal,” Lia says over her shoulder.

I hook my fingers at the top of her towel and pull it away, only to find the rash is covering her full back.

“Lia, it’s your whole back—”

“I know. I have a doctor’s appointment scheduled.” She tries to brush me off again and keeps walking toward the patio door.

Reaching for her hand, I stop her and turn her around to face me, her cheeks flushed pink. “Hey, where are you going?” I ask gently.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she protests. “I know it’s gross, but I know it’s not contagious, so there’s nothing to worry about it.”

She thinks it’s gross. That it bothers me. That couldn’t be farther from the truth.

“When is your appointment?”

Her eyes look to the floor, then the ceiling as she says, “Ummm, I’m on a waitlist for cancellation. But I have one in July.”

“July? As in like… almost eight months from now?” I ask, feeling my brows press into my forehead.

Lia sighs. “It’s the best I can do.”

“You are aware that you work for an organization who has doctors on staff? And if they can’t help you, they most likely know someone else who can?”

She shifts her weight, crossing her arms tighter across her chest. “I’m not asking for any favors. I don’t need to bother anyone with this. It’s not like I’m a player. I’ve got this under control.”

“You’re part of the team,” I stress. “And under control? You have something going on that looks like it fucking hurts, and it’s taking over most of your back. Will it be your entire body by the time you get to see the doctor? ”

“Why do you sound mad? This doesn’t impact you in any way shape or form,” she snaps while walking past me, headed for the stairs.

I follow her. “You know what? I am mad. And this does impact me.”

Surprised by my answer, Lia turns from a few stairs up and snaps back, “Do tell.”

It feels like she’s challenging me. “I’m mad that you’d rather hurt and suffer over taking help that I, or someone else, can offer. Yes, that makes me mad. And this,” I point between the two of us, “does impact me. You are part of my life. I care about you. I want you to be both happy and fucking healthy.”

I’m afraid she’s going to run upstairs, pack a bag, and leave, but I can’t let this go.

“If you’re pissed at me for wanting to take care of you? Go ahead. Be annoyed enough that you don’t let me help you. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to quit trying. I guess I’ll spend the rest of forever trying to do what I can. Give you everything you deserve. There’s a lot I’m willing to do to keep you, for as long as I can, why can’t you understand that?”

My voice dwindles and sounds softer than I planned.

Lia’s eyes widen. “Forever?” she asks, stepping down the stairs and getting closer to me.

“Or however long you let me have you,” I admit, putting my hands on her hips as she stands in front of me. “I think of things that could happen in the future, and you’re there. You’re always there.”

She’s silent, but steps down onto a stair closer to me. The air between us is charged, heavy and full. Like it’s full of the secrets we’ve been keeping—together and on our own.

“You mean it?” Lia asks softly. “Even though I’m a lot… with flooded apartments and random illnesses an d—”

I put a finger to her lips. “You can tell me that you’re a lot all you want… but you still feel like the right amount for me.” Something crackles in the air; I can feel it rush over my skin. Something is coming.

Moving my finger from her lips, I wait for her to argue, to push back. Instead, she leans in and places her mouth against mine. I wrap my arms around her lower back and lift her from the stairs. When she’s flush against me, her hands move from the towel to my neck, pulling us closer together.

Lia breaks our kiss and her eyes, shining like pieces of sunlight through the trees, make me want to spill my guts. Anything she wants to know? It’s hers.

“Brooks, I’m going to say something to you. You don’t have to respond. But…” Lia takes a deep breath before sighing and saying, “I’m in love with you.”

The air breaks. There it is . I can’t help the smirk that spreads over my lips.

“I tell you I want you forever, and you don’t think I love you?” I look away before catching her eyes. “Of course I love you,” I insist.

She falls into me, letting me hold her for what feels like the first real time. There’s no part of her holding back.

“I’ve got you,” I say as I carry her upstairs.

I feel lighter, finally telling her my secret—how I love her the way I do.

And how I plan to keep doing it.