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Eddie

‘Good fuckin’ morning, Fly Man. You want some fuckin’ eggs or what?’

I lifted my head off Denise’s couch and immediately felt pain soaking into the back of my neck. Tony Two Fucks was in the small kitchen of her studio apartment fixing breakfast.

‘I’ll just have coffee and Advil,’ I said.

‘You ain’t fuckin’ drinkin’ again, ya fuck?’

‘No, it’s the couch. Not the bottle.’

I stretched my legs to the floor, sat up and rubbed my left shoulder. Stretched my neck and back. It wasn’t the couch. It was stress, but I didn’t want Tony nor anyone else to know about it.

‘That suit looks like Lake wore it,’ said Denise as she came into the kitchen wearing a dressing gown, her wet hair caught up in a towel. She kissed Tony, and they whispered something together. I couldn’t hear it. Whatever it was made them both smile. I was happy for Denise.

I’d slept in my shirt and suit pants. The blankets Denise had given me last night were still folded neatly on the chair opposite. I heard the sound of nails on a hardwood floor and then felt a long, wet tongue licking my face. I said good morning to Clarence and gave him a belly rub. Tony cut open a whole packet of bacon and dumped it in the pan. Denise was vegetarian. Half the pack was for Tony. Half for Clarence, who, once he’d said good morning to me, scampered over to the kitchen and sat at Tony’s feet. The smell of bacon hitting a hot pan was too tempting for him.

‘Don’t go into the office today,’ I said.

Denise poured me a coffee, brought it over to the couch with a bottle of painkillers.

‘Breakfast is served. So what’s going on? Are we closing?’

‘For the next few days I want you safe at home. I’m sleeping on people’s couches, never staying in the same place two nights in a row, and this case . . . I just need to end this. All of it. The price on my head, the crazy person who’s working behind the scenes on the Jackson case, and I need to find whoever really killed Margaret Blakemore.’

‘How are you going to do that?’

‘I don’t know exactly, but I have a rough idea how to start.’

I rubbed my neck, then dry-swallowed three pills.

‘Easy on those,’ said Denise.

‘Tony, I need you to do a couple things for me today, if that’s alright?’

‘Sure, whatever the fuck,’ he said.

For a second, I didn’t register it. Then, I noticed he’d only dropped one f-bomb in that sentence. Denise saw the realization on my face.

She whispered, ‘We’ve been working on our language. I don’t want my mother, who’s eighty-seven, to throw him out of the house two seconds after he walks in.’

‘He’s meeting your mother? Must be getting serious.’

I took a gulp of hot coffee, stood, stretched and then talked to Tony.

‘I’ll talk to Lake this morning. He’ll call you and help out with this. I need an apartment in Leonard Street, in the old Clock Tower Building.’

‘What do I look like – a fuckin’ realtor to you?’

‘ I don’t want to rent it. I want somebody to rent out their place. I couldn’t afford that building. I just need it to go up on Airbnb or some place like that. Just for a couple of days. I’m sure there’s regulations that state you can’t rent out your apartment like that, but I’m sure you can convince a suitable candidate. I’ll compensate them accordingly.’

‘You gonna pay their fuckin’ hospital bills?’

‘Don’t hurt anyone in that building. Be subtle. And don’t kidnap anybody either. Just, you know, use your powers of persuasion.’

Tony nodded, tipped the bacon onto a plate and started breaking eggs into the pan.

‘Oh, and I need one more thing. Ask Jimmy if he can set up a meeting with Buchanan. It’s time I met New York’s Finest.’

‘A meeting? Jimmy don’t fuckin’ meet no cops.’

Denise had been listening, and gave Tony the eye – he was swearing.

‘Not for him. For me.’

‘You’re going to have a fuckin’ sit down with a bunch of crooked cops who are trying to kill you?’

‘Do you have any better ideas on how to end this?’

‘Sure, fuckin’ kill ’em all.’

‘Tony, watch your mouth,’ said Denise.

Tony held up a hand by way of apology.

‘I can’t take on a whole crew. Not without more people getting killed. I’m not going to ask Jimmy to start a war for me. Just ask him to set it up. I’ll go on my own. I want to be in a room with Buchanan. Tell Jimmy I want to make them an offer.’

Tony started laughing, said, ‘You got some fuckin’ balls on you, kid.’

Denise tossed her head in frustration.

‘I need time to think. I’m going for a long walk to West 74 th Street,’ I said.

‘Eddie, just be careful,’ said Denise.

‘I have to finish this. I’m sick of being careful. It’s time I started being smart.’