Page 32 of Within Shadows

Maeve

My father finally gives up on getting me to speak and leaves the steaming mug of coffee next to me.

His retreat gives me more room to breathe as I pick at the hoodie sleeve I’m wearing.

My hands finally stop trembling, but they’re still cold.

The entire room is freezing and stinks of antiseptic, the way all hospitals do.

I burrow my nose into the collar of my hoodie and take a deep breath, my eyes closing as I sink into his smell.

Convincing myself that his arms are wrapped around me is easier like this, which is why I’ve been living in his clothes for the last week.

A familiar hand gently rubs my shoulder and Jess leans into view, holding a hairbrush and gives me a kind smile.

“I’m going to do a braid today. Those pill-happy doctors are looking for any reason to force you back into your old room. Think your parents agree with them,” she huffs, and I grunt in disagreement.

“Oh sweetie, don’t you worry. Al is out there setting them straight as we speak.

Taking care of both of you is basically a full-time job now, you know?

I don’t mind, obviously. I love the both of you with my whole heart.

But my patience only goes so far. You still haven’t touched your food, and I am ready to strap you to a chair and force feed you.

” Jess keeps chattering, and the corner of my lip twitches, the ghost of a smile on my face as I stare at the machines on the wall.

Jess has been my rock through this hell I woke up to.

Images of Knox flash through my mind, the blood pooling around us as I frantically sought out his heartbeat.

I reach up and press my knuckles over my heart, rubbing the ache that hasn’t stopped since that night.

Al drops into the chair next to mine and still won’t look at me.

Jess told me a few days ago that he doesn’t blame me but blames himself for not being there sooner.

Guilt is something we both have sat with, in the silence that stretches on too long. It’s somehow become a comfortable habit of ours.

“Doc says if you don’t eat, then it’s back to your room to get an I.V.

, and they’ll strap you down to keep you from rippin’ this one out,” he grumbles, crossing his arms as he stretches out his legs.

He kicks the bed in front of us, jostling it as he growls.

I whip my head to look at him, shooting to my feet and causing Jess to lose her grip on my hair.

“Don’t.” The word is raspy, my throat still sore from screaming until I fell into silence. It’s not that I don’t want to talk, I just have nothing to say anymore. Al raises his brow and holds a tray of food out to me.

“Then fucking eat, for our sake and his. When he wakes up and finds out you’re starving yourself, it’s my ass,” he snaps. I swat the tray, letting it clatter to the floor between us. Al launches to his feet and pokes a finger into my chest.

“Get a grip, girl. He needs you to keep it together. I’m getting another tray.

You’re gonna eat and then shower because you fuckin’ stink.

” Al towers over me, his tone lethal, but I can see how red his eyes are.

He’s not sleeping either as we stay at Knox’s bedside, day after day.

Al is hurting as much as I am, but only one of us is shutting down.

Soft sniffles break the staredown and we both look over to see Jess, hand over her mouth as tears track down her face. Al brushes past me as he takes her into his arms, and my anger deflates. My father stands in the doorway with his arms crossed, uncertainty in his eyes as he watches me.

“Jess, here’s some cash. Why don’t you two go have lunch and bring her back a chocolate muffin and a lemonade.

” My dad places money in Jess's hand, patting Al on the shoulder as he leads her from the room.

He walks to me with purpose and grabs my arm to gently push me back into my chair.

His hands fumble as he struggles to finish the braid that came undone in my fit.

I stare at the tubes snaking around Knox and his bed, most obvious is the breathing tube that sticks out of his mouth.

How many times have I imagined them pulling that tube out so that I can hear his voice once again?

“I wonder if we should give him a matching braid. That wouldn’t be very cool rocker of him, though,” my dad mutters, and I scoff out the ghost of a laugh as my dad finishes and sits next to me.

“Can’t believe sweet Jess ran a guy over.

Or that the little roach lived. She and Al have told me quite a bit about your sleeping beauty.

” My dad laughs at his joke, and I almost groan at him.

“A man who fights that hard for my little girl, to protect her and earn her affection, is alright with me. Oliver tried awfully hard to slander the poor boy, but your statement and the security footage cleared that all up. They’re still going to need you to testify, sweetheart,” he says gently, taking my hand in his.

Obviously Al left out quite a few details of just how Knox earned my affection, including stalking, and that’s for the best. I nod and lean forward, resting my head on Knox’s shoulder.

He’s so warm and right next to me, but it feels like he’s a million miles away right now. His arm flexes beneath my hand and I shoot up, ripping my hand from my father as I grip Knox’s arm.

“Knox?” My voice cracks as I watch him, waiting for another sign that he’s waking up.

“Honey?” my dad asks, squeezing my shoulder.

“He moved,” I whisper, mentally begging him to do it again. My dad sighs and sits back down.

“It was probably a reflex, Maeve. The doctors have said that—” he begins, but I cut him off.

“No. Fuck those doctors,” I rasp out as I cup Knox’s face, pressing my forehead to his.

“Wake up, please. I need you,” I beg him, finally feeling something worse than despair for the first time in days.

Hope . Yet nothing happens. The monitors don’t change, his chest continues to rise and fall in a steady rhythm with the hiss of a machine.

My legs start to shake and I dejectedly drop back into my chair, tears clinging to my lashes as I lay my head down.

Soft steps shuffle into the room, and the crinkling of plastic is at my ear. My mother’s perfume washes over me and I welcome the way it takes away the sterile hospital smell for a moment.

“Jess brought your muffin and lemonade. Al is taking her home so they can shower and rest for a bit.” My mother shoves the muffin into my cheek, and I pull back to frown at her.

“Eat before I help them sedate and drag you out of here. Jess even got you a bright orange bendy straw.” My mom cracks open the bottle and drops the straw inside, thrusting it into my hands and standing over me until I take a reluctant sip.

She nods once in triumph and raises a brow until I finally take a bite of the muffin.

My stomach rumbles at the first taste of food I’ve had in two days. It’s dry and sticks to the roof of my mouth, but I silently eat the entire thing as she watches me. My mother takes the trash and nudges my father towards the door.

“Go get some fresh clothes for her, Al took Jess back to his house. When he wakes up, she’s not going to want to stink this badly.

” My mom doesn’t bother lowering her voice, and I shake my head.

Feeling full, the exhaustion hits me like a wave as I lay my head onto Knox once again, clutching his hand in mine.

I let the sound of the machine lull me to sleep along with the slow rise and fall of his chest. A blanket is draped over my shoulders, wrapping me in comfort and warmth.

My eyes fly open as I’m wrenched backwards, and I scrabble to grab onto something, anything.

The lights are flicked on and I turn my head away, blinking rapidly to clear the spots from my eyes.

Nurses are rushing the room as Knox thrashes in the bed.

Al has an arm wrapped around my chest and shoulders as he holds me back.

“What’s happening to him?” I scream, fighting to break loose of Al. A doctor jogs into the room as a nurse pulls out the breathing tube, and the chaos calms. Knox relaxes into the bed, coughing as he weakly raises a hand to rub at his face.

Al pulls me, turning us away from him, and I try to get out of his hold.

“Give the guy a shred of decency. Catheter ,” he mutters, and I nod, my lip quivering as tears burn the back of my throat.

I let Al take the brunt of my weight as my legs give out and I struggle to catch my breath.

The doctor stops in front of us, but I can’t raise my eyes away from the blurry floor.

“He’ll need some rest, and we will have to do a few tests, but I’ll give you guys a moment.

” With that, the doctor leaves and Al finally releases his hold on me.

My feet hit the ground running as I rush to the bed, a sob breaking free when he smiles at me.

I wrap my arms around his neck, careful to keep my weight off of him.

Knox groans, burying his face in my neck as he pulls me onto the bed until my body lies flush over his.

“Your wounds, Knox,” I manage to cry out, but he shakes his head and holds me tighter.

“You’re alive, muse. My injuries be damned, I didn't know if I would ever hold you again.” His voice is raspy, and he coughs into my shoulder but doesn’t let go.

We finally relax our hold on each other enough that I can sit on the edge of the bed and stare into the eyes I’ve missed so much.

Al holds a cup of water out to me and I take it, helping Knox sip from the straw.

“I’m so sorry, brother,” Al says, standing over us. Knox rolls his eyes and clears his throat as he pulls me close again.

“A lot of what happened is fuzzy, but we are both alive. Thanks to you, I’m guessing?” Knox raises a brow, laying back against the pillows as if talking is exhausting him.

“Jess and I were coming home. Pulled in and saw you bleeding overtop of Maeve. Jess hit the gas and plowed into Oliver just before he could put a third hole into you.” Al crosses his arms and takes a deep breath.

“Thought you were gone. Maeve wouldn’t let go and kept screaming.

I pried her off and handed her to the medics.

I thought you had—” Al grunts, sniffing hard as he looks away.

Knox reaches out and weakly punches Al on the arm.

“Shut up, you saved her. That means more to me than anything. I owe you my life.” Knox turns to me and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

“What about you? Are you okay?” he asks me. I smile and nod, catching his hand to rub my cheek against it.

“Liar,” Al says, and I shoot him a dirty look.

“She ain't been sleeping, showering, or eating. Just sits at your bedside and growls at us. She might also have mange, from the looks of her. They kept her sedated and in bed for a week, but she ripped out her I.V. and stormed the castle to find her damn prince.” I try to kick at Al’s leg, but he moves and Knox sits forward with renewed strength.

He grips my chin and forces my eyes to meet his.

There’s a storm behind his eyes and I’m at the center of it.

“You don’t get to neglect yourself, Thalia. I didn’t risk my life for you to let yourself waste away. This changes. Right. Now . You’re going to shower, eat a hot meal, and only then can you come back to my room.” He narrows his eyes when I open my mouth to argue.

“Says the man who pouted because his girlfriend let his alter ego finger bang her,” Al scoffs, and Knox turns his glare on him.

“You told him?” I playfully smack Knox on his good shoulder, and he winks at me.

“I may have bragged a little.” Knox shrugs, flinching as he rubs a hand over his bandaged shoulder.

“And whined about it.” Al yawns, scrubbing a hand over his face to hide his smile. Before I can say anything else, a nurse walks in, and she has a strict look about her. She puts her hands on her wide hips and frowns at the three of us.

“They are leaving. She needs a shower and food, and he’s going to make sure she listens.” Knox pulls me to him, giving me a quick kiss before motioning for Al to corral me out the doorway.

“She didn’t leave your side,” I hear the older woman say as we leave.

“And I’ll never leave hers again,” Knox says.