Page 14 of Winds of Death (War of the Alliance #4)

“No, no. I’m fine. Just need to lie down.” Fieran spoke in a rushed, staccato tone as he half-fell, half-lowered himself from the bench.

She wasn’t sure what to do or how to help, and she ended up just sitting there, her hands awkwardly hovering in the space between them. This was why she was a mechanic instead of a nurse.

With a sigh, he stretched out on the ground, his legs underneath the plants to one side of them and his head on the pavers by Pip’s feet where the arbor and bench cast a patch of shade.

He tucked a hand beneath his head as a cushion.

Only then did he peer up at her. “I’m fine.

Really. Just still healing. Sometimes my bones start aching if I sit for too long, and I just have to lie down. ”

It looked rather uncomfortable, lying there half on the pavers, half on the dirt.

Pip glanced around, but she couldn’t find a cushion or pillow or anything soft tucked behind the bench or within reach.

Probably wise, given this was an exposed rooftop.

But still, she couldn’t just leave Fieran like that, trying to use his own arm as a pillow.

“Here.” Pip knelt on the pavers next to him. “Lift your head.”

Fieran’s eyebrows rose, but he raised his head.

She settled into a sitting position on the pavers with her legs stretched in front of her and her back against the bench behind her. Her rear end would go to sleep if she sat like this too long, but it was worth it.

Fieran eyed her, then he lowered his head onto her lap with another soft moan, as if even that much movement hurt.

Pip wasn’t quite sure what to do with her hands. She tentatively lowered one hand to rest on Fieran’s shoulder while she kept the other planted on the ground next to her.

Fieran reached up and clasped the hand she’d placed on his shoulder. “Are you all right? None of this has been easy on you.”

“I’m okay, I guess.” Pip leaned her head against the bench behind her, blinking at the tears threatening to rise once again.

“It was just…really hard. First I saw your aeroplane fall from the sky. And then Merrik’s aeroplane flew overhead, burning.

He crashed, and when we pulled him out…it was bad. ”

She sucked in a shuddering breath and squeezed her eyes shut. Yet that didn’t help. All it did was call up the memories of Merrik’s dacha lifting him from the wreckage. Laying him on the ground. Merrik’s pale face. His mangled legs. So much blood.

“Pip.” Fieran’s fingers touched her cheek as his other hand squeezed hers.

She shook the memories away and forced her eyes open.

Fieran’s gaze was searching her face. “I’m sorry you’ve been going through so much, and I’ve been too drugged and wrapped up in my own recovery to be there for you.”

“It’s all right.” Somehow, Pip’s other hand—the one not clasped in Fieran’s—found its way to stroking the short strands of Fieran’s red hair.

“You fell out of the sky. You probably shouldn’t even be alive.

You needed to focus on healing. I’m not so fragile that I couldn’t get by.

Besides, I wasn’t alone. My brother was there for me, as were the other flyboys. ”

“I’m glad.” Fieran’s smile tipped his mouth in a way that made her think about that kiss they’d shared. Or almost shared? It had been so brief it didn’t really count.

But now probably wasn’t the time for kissing. Not that she didn’t want to kiss Fieran. But their relationship was more than just about kissing, and right now she needed to know the foundation was solid before she thought about kissing again.

“So…” Pip ran her fingers through his hair as she cradled his head on her lap. “Where does this leave us? We were talking about us , but then the attack, and you crashed, and…I just need to know where we go from here.”

“Pip.” Fieran lifted a hand again, brushing the back of his fingers across her cheek.

“When my aeroplane went into its death spiral, you were my only regret. Yes, I regretted that my parents and siblings would mourn. I regretted that I wouldn’t be there for the Half-Breed Squadron.

But I knew I’d loved my family well. I knew I’d done my best for the squadron.

But when it came to you, I had so many regrets. I’ve made so many mistakes.”

She stilled. Fieran’s touch on her cheek sent tingles through her.

“I never should have made you feel like a distraction.” Fieran’s gaze remained locked on hers, the look in those blue depths arresting. “I was treating you like a mild flirtation that I could just brush aside for a while. But you are more than a mere distraction. You deserve so much more.”

Her mouth went dry, and she couldn’t have said anything even if all her words hadn’t fled her brain like a flock of starlings taking off.

A flirtatious, grinning Fieran sent flutters to her stomach. But a sincere Fieran was the kind of man she could truly fall in love with.

Fieran rolled into a sitting position, his hand dropping from her face though he didn’t let go of her hand with his other one.

Once he was upright, he met her gaze. “I want to do this right , Pip. I want a relationship like the one my parents have. Like the one your parents have. I want to see if we can have that together. Because you are the most amazing, clever, tough, smart woman I’ve met, and I think I’ve been falling for you since the moment I saw you head-down in an engine. ”

All Pip managed was a breathless, squeaky sound. She really should say something. Anything. She peeled her dry tongue from the roof of her mouth, trying for a light tone. “I know just how much you’ve been falling for me. You told me. Sang it for me, actually.”

The look of utter confusion that wrinkled his forehead and widened his eyes nearly had a giggle bubbling up inside her. “I did what?”

“You sang a ditty about how much you loved me. With your dacha sitting there and witnessing the whole thing.” She had to bite her lip to stop her giggles at the horrified look on Fieran’s face.

“I’ve been hoping those hazy memories were dreams.” He grimaced. “How badly did I embarrass myself?”

“Terribly, I’m afraid.” Pip leaned closer, wrapping her arms around his neck. “Though I think your dacha was the more embarrassed.”

Fieran groaned and leaned his forehead lightly against hers. “Next time I’m drugged out of my mind, just gag me or cover my mouth or something.”

“I wanted the ground to swallow me at the time but now…” Feeling rather brave, Pip brushed her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. “Now I find it hilarious. And rather cute. Even while you were drugged, that’s all you could say the moment you saw me. That you love me.”

“It’s high time that not-drugged me tells you that I love you.” Fieran lowered his voice until he was speaking nearly at a whisper. “And that I’d really like to kiss you.”

She wasn’t quite sure which of them started the kissing. Maybe him. Maybe her. A spark lit in her chest and burned through her, stealing all her senses except her sense of him.

She tugged him closer, molding herself to him. But instead of deepening the kiss, he gave a pained groan that had her immediately pulling back. “Sorry, sorry. I forgot.”

“It’s fine. I’m okay.” Fieran sat back to lean heavily against the bench. He closed his eyes as he let his head drop onto the bench. “Sorry. I wanted this to be a lot more romantic”

“You’re still healing.” Pip claimed one of his hands again, threading her fingers with his. “And I thought that was plenty romantic.”

“Good.” He tilted his head to look at her, and his eyes had a look to them that she’d never seen before. He was so somber. So lacking in any trace of his usual mischief and humor. “May I court you? For real? No hiding. No sneaking. Just you and me building a relationship the right way.”

She opened her mouth, tried to speak, closed her mouth, and swallowed. “Yes.” The word came out such a squeaky croak that she sucked in a breath and tried again. “Yes!”

Mindful of his injuries this time, she steadied herself with the bench as she kissed Fieran.

But she kept the kiss short. All she’d needed in these past few days was the reassurance that she and Fieran were good, and she had that now. It was time to look after Fieran.

Pushing to her feet, Pip tugged on Fieran’s hand. “Come on. You need to head home and go back to bed. You clearly shouldn’t be up this long yet.”

Fieran huffed a breath that was somewhere between a laugh and a groan. Even with him using the bench to lever himself upright, Pip still had to brace herself to haul him to his feet.

Once he was upright, he leaned heavily on her. “I know I just asked to court you less than a minute ago, but my mama is here and waiting to meet you. And since we aren’t hiding anything, we’re going to have to tell Louise.”

Only courting for a minute, and she was already going to meet his family.

Yet she wasn’t afraid. Or at least, not in the way she would’ve expected. She wanted to meet his mama and hug Louise as Fieran’s girlfriend and not just a random mechanic who needed a place to stay.

“I’d love to meet your mama.” Pip wrapped an arm around Fieran’s waist, the better to keep him upright as they shuffled along the path around the greenhouse. “Besides, I already met your dacha. Meeting your mama can’t be any more terrifying than that.”

Fieran tried his best not to lean too heavily on Pip or betray just how much pain he was in, even with the healing magic coursing through him.

But pushing himself had been worth it. He and Pip had needed that conversation. He’d needed to undo some of the mistakes he’d made with her. Fix some of the damage he’d done with his selfishness. Finish that kiss, even if he’d interrupted it again.

More than that, Pip had said yes. She was officially his girlfriend.

He would have shouted it from the rooftops…if he hadn’t been about to keel over.