Page 19 of Whisper Woods (Legends of the Whisper Woods #3)
Seff
Two Years Ago
“Fuck, I needed this.” I groan, nuzzling further into Rafe’s arms, pretending I mean the mind-blowing orgasms we just shared and not literally this.
It’s something I rarely get to do with a lover. It always feels a little awkward, like I’m forcing my neediness on them. But Rafe just tucks his arms tighter around me, letting me hug the arm across my chest extra tight. He even kisses my head, too. It should feel patronising or something, but it’s not. And it makes my heart do a funny skip beat thing I know he can feel.
“Bad day, my kushinavya?” His voice rumbles against my cheek, the strange endearment making my stomach go all warm and fuzzy.
I don’t want to bring my shit into this warm fluffy afterglow bubble we have going on, but it’s like he has a compulsion on me. I can’t help but share every single part of me—even when I know I shouldn’t.
“Just… I saw my ex today. At the local tavern. Nothing bad happened, he just kind of ignores me now. But this orc was hitting on him. I don’t think he even knew what was happening. He’s always been oblivious to that shit. It was just weird to see, threw me off is all.”
Rafe’s arms are locked tight with tension, and I realise what a monumental idiot I am talking about my ex while Rafe’s cum is still all over my stomach from our epic frot session.
“Oh.” The single word is dripping with tone. Fuck. “Are you—do you still?” Rafe can’t seem to get the words out. It sounds like he’s choking. In another situation it would be funny, since he’s always so smooth.
My hands grip his arms tight, and I crane my head back to look him in the eyes. There are no promises between us. Nothing but stolen moments outside of our lives, like little bubbles of unreality.
“No. No. I care about him. But that’s not it.” It is a cruel twist of fate that the two men my spirit longs for can never be mine to keep.
It’s one of the many secrets I keep locked away in the imaginary tower in my mind.
Rafe relaxes underneath me, but not by much. I’ve really fucked it. There is something in his eye that’s more shuttered now. I’ve torn the protective circle around us just a little, allowing the outside in.
His fingers stroke the patches of skin they are holding, more for his comfort than mine I think. I sink back against him and press my ear to his chest, listening to the thumping rhythm of his heart.
“There isn’t anyone else.” I whisper and his fingers flex against me before resuming their gentle strokes. “Not like this.” Not like you .
Sometimes I wish I was human, free from the intense instincts that come with being a being. Then I could just take the risk and jump. Say all the things that Rafe and I never say. To claim this connection between us. But that instinct forces me back. It knows what my dumbass heart doesn’t, and it physically holds me back from asking the questions that could ruin everything.
Rafe presses another kiss to my hair, inhaling a deep breath, like he’s savouring my scent. He doesn’t make a promise, and I’m glad. Either option is really fucking depressing.
“Tell me about where you’ve been.” I ask after a while, when I feel him relax once again. He perks up, scratching his back on the tree he’s leaning against. It means I have to readjust too, so we take a second to get comfy again before he sighs melodramatically.
“I have not had any trips quite as interesting as my time in Alluyes, I’m afraid. But I did spend some time with the mages to the south of Ulydessia, in the mountains.”
I shuffle back tighter into the warmth of his arms. It may be spring, but it’s early in the season and the nights in the Woods are still bitterly cold. Rafe pulled a blanket out of Gods know where to wrap around us as we made out like horny teenagers on the grass of this random clearing. How we managed to run into each other here, I have no idea. I don’t even know where I am.
“And what did you do there?”
My fingers play with the light dusting of hair on his arm around my waist. He starts talking, but I’m not really listening. It’s not that I’m trying to be rude, it’s just hard to keep my eyes open. I’m just exhausted, I couldn’t sleep last night and then a whole day of work... Wrapped up like this is like being in a safe, warm cocoon.
My eyes drift shut and I listen to Rafe’s stories about the mages who’s skills with water and air have them controlling the ice and snow and the fantastic auroras he witnessed from the glaciers.
“Perhaps one day, you’ll get to see them, too.” He murmurs against the crown of my head. As I fall into my sleep, I breathe a prayer to the Gods that if I do get to see them, it’s by his side.