Page 31 of What’s Left of You (What Left #2)

Because Russell is one of our best friends who does some of the most illegal work, he calls Vinny when his phone alerts him that the FBI tip line has certain key words from a caller. I don’t really know how he set that up, and remaining oblivious to his methods feels like the safer route.

Once my husband relays the message to me, I reach for my shoes. “We have to go meet them.”

“That’s a bad idea,” he tells me instantly, not moving towards the door. “The report didn’t say if it was actually Porscha that was bleeding. It could be someone else’s blood.”

“My mother may be a nutcase,” I tell him, “but she’s careful. If she’s casually walking down the side of the highway for everyone to see, something happened.”

He nods, knowing I’m right. She’s been cautious all this time, and now suddenly she’s letting herself be seen in broad daylight ? If the blood isn’t hers, I’d be surprised.

I wait for the panic and fear to set in, the worry that my mother might be hurt, but the feeling never comes. My heart has gone cold when it comes to Porscha Surwright, and there’s nothing she could say or do now to change that.

Maybe this is all she ever was.

“I can’t just sit here and wait,” I tell Vinny, sliding into my flats.

I’m in shorts and a tank, my scars on full display, but right now I just don’t care.

I almost wish I had a hat though, one of the decorative ones I left behind in Colorado that have become almost a trademark of mine.

I could use that kind of confidence right now.

“The report didn’t say anything about Alastair? ”

He shakes his head once. “No. The only report is Porscha. Russell will call back if he hears anything else.”

My hands clench, thinking about what that could mean. They saw Porscha, but no Alastair, and he’s been missing for over two months.

I refuse to believe he’s dead. I can’t let fifteen years pass without touching him again, even if it’s just to slap some sense into that big, empty head of his. Why is he still missing? My mother isn’t the person I wanted them to find.

“Do we call Sterling?” I ask, thinking out loud. If Porsha was spotted by a civilian, the police and FBI will go out immediately to try and catch her. She should be on the hook for at least one death, maybe more.

“I’m sure he knows about her already,” Vinny replies, and despite his protest he’s also grabbing his things, including his gun. “And I know he wouldn’t want us there.”

“We could be average civilians, just out for a drive,” I reason.

“Really, Jo? You don’t think anyone will be suspicious that we just happen to show up at the same time your mother is captured?”

“It’s not like we knew where she was,” I go on. “I was hoping the news would be about Alastair anyway.”

He sighs, reaching out to cup my cheek. “Me too.”

~~~

We follow the directions Russell gave us, but he doesn’t call back with anything else. He might have no idea who Alastair is, but he cares for us. If there was something to share he would.

When we see police lights up ahead, both sides of this small highway suddenly shut down, I exchange a look with Vinny. “Think they found her?”

He hesitates. “Do you want them to?”

What a loaded question. Of course I want them to find her! And it’s not just because she’s my mom, but because she has a lot to answer for.

Every time she crosses my mind, my chest tightens. When I thought Alastair was the one killing me, that really hurt. But my mother deciding to cut me to ribbons?

That’s so much worse and if I’m honest with myself, I’m afraid to know the truth.

We drive as far as we can until the barricade stops us. A police officer I don’t recognize comes over to Vinny’s window. I twist until I can see his badge, and it reads Walters County Police Department. We shouldn’t know anyone out here.

“Gonna have to reroute, folks,” the officer says, oblivious to who we are. “Police activity ahead. The road will be closed down for a while.”

Does that mean something else happened? Could be a standoff, could just be my mother making things difficult. Maybe the blood was hers and now it’s a medical emergency.

“Shame,” Vinny says, giving nothing away. If the officer doesn’t recognize us, all the better. “It’s not that escaped convict, is it? I heard you all have a problem with serial killers out here.”

I glare into the side of his head, hoping he can feel the heat of my hate. Unbelievable. There goes any shred of discretion.

The officer clears his throat. “That’s not something I can comment on, sir.”

“If the person up there is Porscha Surwright, she’s my mother,” I say, and the cop bends down to get a better look at me. “The FBI, are they up there? Agent Gideon might want to speak with me.”

Now Vinny shoots me a look. We’re kind of on the same page, but I’m sure he doesn’t want me anywhere near my mother.

The cop clears his throat, taking a step back from the car as he clicks his radio. “I have two individuals here claiming to know Ms. Surwright.”

“Have them park, I’ll be right there.” I recognize Sterling’s voice coming through the radio. He sounds pissed.

The officer directs us to where we can park, and I’m out of the vehicle before Vinny turns the engine off. “You’ll need to wait here,” the officer tells us in a no-nonsense tone.

Do I want to see my mother again? I’m not entirely sure if I want to or if Sterling will even let me. As Vinny joins me, we see Sterling jogging over. I was right – he is pissed.

“How the hell did you find us,” he yells. “You two cannot be here, this is an active scene!”

“Involving my mother,” I snap back. “And maybe a hostage?”

He scoffs. “There’s no hostage situation. Your mother may be dumb, but she’s not that dumb.”

Frowning, I glance at Vinny before looking back at him. “What do you mean?”

He groans, dragging a hand down his face. It doesn’t look like he’s shaved in a couple of days and his beard is starting to grow in thick. “If her rambling is to be believed, the slice across her throat is from Alastair. With an axe. She claims he thought she was an illusion.”

I narrow my eyes. “She could be making things up.”

“Don’t jump to Alastair’s defense,” he says, raising a brow. “I can’t go into the details with you two, but you absolutely cannot be here right now. We have Porscha in custody, not Alastair. When it’s safe to see your mother-”

“I’m not sure I want to see my mother-”

“We’ll call you,” he says, ignoring what I said. He glances between us before shaking his head. “Now go. You’re interrupting the case.”

Shaking my head, I step closer and jab a finger into his chest. “I thought, after everything, maybe you would be different.”

His eyebrows lift. “Like what, Jo? Like I’d let a killer escape?”

“Like you’d give him the chance,” I say quietly, and I don’t know why I bother. Porscha is here. Alastair isn’t. Maybe he’s already far away.

Sterling hesitates, his brows knitting with confusion before he shakes it off. “I can’t turn my back on the law for a killer, Jo. Even if you ask nicely. He has to pay for his crimes.”

“And if he’s not the only one who’s guilty?”

“Not here,” Sterling snaps. “I’m working! Like it or not, this is my job. Porscha will go in for questioning once the medics determine she’s stable enough.” He takes a breath and lowers his voice. “I can tell you she needs stitches but that’s all I can say.”

I shake my head, not caring about what my mother needs. I stare at Vinny, needing him to side with me. “I’m sorry, Sterling. You’re busy with Porscha. We could help you look for-”

“Jo,” he interrupts tiredly, holding up a hand. “I get that you want to have hope that this has a happy ending, that somehow Alastair ends up pardoned for his crimes and you can all start over or something. But that isn’t what’s happening here. Now let me work.”

Anger and betrayal rush through me, and I don’t know if it’s towards Alastair for getting tangled into all of this or for Sterling pointing out the facts.

As he turns to head back, I point at him, opening my mouth to tell him just what I think when I’m interrupted by a peal of loud, unhinged laughter.

My mother. She sounds completely deranged and Sterling turns without another word towards her voice.

“I’m not going with you!” she screams, and I guess whatever happened to Mom didn’t affect her vocal chords. “Get off, get off! I’ll kill every last one of you!”

Vinny wraps an arm around my shoulders and tucks my head into his shoulder to muffle the sound of her voice but I can still make out the words, “They deserved it! They all deserved it and so do you!”

Is it Sterling she’s hurling these vile words at? Even if I’m angry with him, he doesn’t deserve her abuse. Vinny tugs on my shoulders, trying to get me to leave.

But I can’t.

“Get away, get away! You can’t hide me from my fans!”

Fans? Does she mean all the people who adored Alastair? I’m not sure his audience would be the same as hers.

“Jo,” Vinny urges. I try to pull away to get closer and he just shakes his head, tightening his hold on me. “Not now. If she’s acting like this they’ll need to subdue her.”

“I need to see,” I hiss.

“There’s no way in hell I’m letting you anywhere near her.”

“She’s my mother-”

“No. She’s the monster hiding behind the mask your mother wore. You think seeing Alastair in prison was bad? Seeing your parents stumble and disappoint you is worse.”

I hesitate, glancing up at him. Surely he’s talking about Massimo, since Gloria doesn’t actually do anything. Massimo never pretended to have any love for his sons, but at least my mother could fake her feelings towards me.

As she screams again, I can’t help but wonder if I ever knew her at all. “This isn’t the end! You think the obsession will end if I’m behind bars?”

~~~