Page 23
Story: Wayward Girls
Mairin and Angela Denny were getting to know each other in bits of stolen moments they snatched here and there.
Angela was from the south side, raised by a strict Irish gran who truly believed the nuns could do no wrong.
As bad as this situation was for Mairin, things were a million times worse for Angela on account of her being pregnant.
The doctor had targeted Angela, probably because she was so incredibly pretty. According to Angela, Gilroy claimed that he
had to monitor some made-up “condition” her grandmother believed she had. Angela had whispered to Mairin that the doctor either
didn’t know or didn’t care that she was pregnant. When Angela told the nuns, they called her a liar. They accused her of sneaking
around on high mass Sunday or with the delivery guys.
There was no special arrangement for pregnant girls in this place. If anything, they endured more than their share of teasing
from some of the others, and were targets for contempt from the nuns and senior girls. The pregnant ones had to work until
they were too big to waddle around the laundry and keep up with the others. Then they went to the charity ward of St. Francis
and came back a couple of weeks later, deflated like punctured balloons.
Mairin was working the drying lines near Angela on a cold, blustery morning when Sister Theresa came over, ringing her bell.
“Agnes,” she yelled. “Agnes, you’re due in the clinic right away.”
Angela dropped what she was doing, and at the same moment, the color dropped from her face. She pulled in a shuddering breath.
“I have to finish my chores, Mother.”
“You can make up the work later,” said the nun. “Hurry along now, Agnes. Mustn’t keep the doctor waiting.”
Mairin could feel Angela’s anxiety like a blast of cold air. Her gut twisted in outrage. Angela refused to talk any more about
what went on during her doctor visits, but Mairin imagined Gilroy forcing her to do things against her will. Until that night
in the bathroom, Mairin had not fully understood how a girl actually got pregnant. Angela confessed that she hadn’t known,
either. It was a terrible way to find out about something that was supposed to be an act of love between a husband and wife.
She couldn’t forget the way the strange doctor had looked at her on her first day, couldn’t forget his thumb gently pressing against her lower lip, and his expression as he’d instructed her to get on the table.
After Mairin had fought him off, she hadn’t been summoned again, probably because the doctor was a coward at heart, preying on girls who didn’t know how to fight back.
Seized by impulse, Mairin scanned the area to make sure no one was looking. Then, shielded by the long line of bedsheets pegged
out to dry, she hurried to the door and slipped through, catching up with Angela, who was trudging along the corridor with
her head down.
“I’m coming with you,” Mairin said.
“What?” Angela looked around. Her face was nearly as pale as the stark white walls. “Coming where?”
“To the clinic.”
“You can’t do that. It’s not allowed.”
“Watch me.” Mairin had no idea what she was signing up for, but she had to try to help. She could still picture the expression
on Gilroy’s face when she’d fought him off. He wasn’t used to defiance. She’d resisted him once, and she could do it again.
Angela stopped walking and turned to Mairin, eyes wide and full of hope. “You’d do that? You’d come to the clinic with me?”
Mairin nodded. “Come on. I’ll make sure he doesn’t force you to have any more appointments with him.”
They entered the small office together. It was just as Mairin remembered, stark and spotless, with a tidy desk and exam table.
The crucifix that hung on the wall was now chipped, and there were cracks where the INRI banner had been glued back together.
The instrument tray was laden with metal objects.
Mairin snatched up a pair of weird-looking bent scissors and slid them into her pocket.
“What are you doing?” Angela asked in a horrified whisper.
Mairin handed her a set of long tweezers. “Hide that in your smock.”
“No! I can’t—”
The door opened. Angela slid the tweezers into her pocket as the doctor stepped into the room. “Now, Agnes, I—” He broke off
when he spied Mairin. She could tell from his expression that he remembered her. “What the devil are you doing here?”
“I am required to come with Agnes to all her appointments,” she bluffed, hoping he couldn’t tell how fast her heart was racing. “All of them, from now on. It’s a new rule.”
“That’s nonsense. It’s preposterous, and completely unnecessary.”
“Oh yeah?” Mairin said. “How about we go check with Mother Superior about the new rule?”
“I shall indeed. I most certainly shall,” he said, his neck turning red. The deep flush told Mairin exactly what she needed
to know. He wasn’t about to explain his shenanigans to Mother Superior.
“Okay, good,” she said. “Want us to wait here, or are we dismissed?” She stood her ground, looking him straight in the eye.
He looked away first, casting a glance over his shoulder. Then he said, “Get back to work, both of you. Immediately.”
The girls scrambled for the door and ran down the hall and out into the yard.
“Oh my God,” Angela gasped, practically hyperventilating. “Oh my God, oh my God. What did you do?”
“Hang on to those tweezers,” Mairin said. “I’ll keep this thing, whatever it is. They might come in handy one day.”
“Silence!” scolded a sharp voice. Sister Theresa, shaking her bell and the heavy rosary around her waist, surged toward them.
“There is to be no talking! You know the rule.”
“Yes, Mother.” Mairin and Angela spoke in unison. Sister Theresa was dumber than a box of hair, and she loved it when girls
bowed their heads and called her mother. Mairin lowered her eyes in humble deference and closed her hand around the cold metal
tool in the pocket of her smock.
She and Angela kept their heads down and continued whispering together. Angela said, “They’re going to make me give my baby
to strangers.”
Mairin gave a bleak nod, thinking of Fiona. “That seems to be how it goes.”
“They won’t give me a choice. I mean, I can’t imagine being some child’s mother, but I can’t not imagine it. The baby is part of me. But they’re going to take him away and I’ll never see him again.”
“It’s kind of what girls have to do,” Mairin said. “Fiona—I told you about that. Her parents won’t let her have any choice
in the matter.”
“They think a child growing up with two married parents will be better off,” Angela said. “But look at me—my own mother was married, but she liked drinking and taking drugs so much that she took off, and I never saw her again. And still I survived that.”
“You’d be a perfectly good mother,” Mairin said.
“They won’t even give me the chance.”
Mairin shaded her eyes and watched a flock of migrating birds overhead. The sight filled her with the yearning to be free.
This could be her moment to escape, she thought, eyeing the wall beyond the drying lines. She could do it. She could get out
of here and not get caught.
Then she looked back at Angela and realized she couldn’t abandon her. Angela was pregnant and terrified. No one would send
her to a cookie-making aunt. She had to stay here. For now, anyway, Angela needed her more than she needed to escape.
“You shouldn’t be talking to that one.” Denise approached Mairin, holding a loaded basket from the shaking room.
Mairin frowned, her mouth full of clothespins. “Huh?”
Denise set down the basket with a thud and turned to Kay, who was behind her. “Get these things on the line, dipshit,” she said to Kay.
“Okey dokey.” Kay was almost always mild and compliant, and like most girls, she was afraid of Denise.
“Why should I stay away from Kay?” Mairin asked.
“Not the retard,” Denise said, with a toss of her head. She had a presence that commanded attention, and a sneer that could
freeze time. “That one.” She jerked her head toward the end of the line, where Angela had resumed working.
Mairin folded a towel over the line and clipped on her pins. “She seems nice enough.”
“Huh. Ask her why she was sent here.”
“It’s none of my business.”
“I’ll tell you why,” Denise blustered. “Her nana caught her fooling around with a girl. ”
“I don’t get it. What do you mean, fooling around?” Mairin fooled around with her friends all the time, laughing and goofing off. Playing records and arguing about whether John or Paul was the cutest Beatle. She missed those days with Fiona and her other school friends. She missed them like crazy.
Denise shook her head. “You don’t know anything. I’m talking about her hugging and kissing and touching down there . Making out. Fooling around like normal girls do with boys.”
“Oh, for Pete’s sake. That’s ridiculous.” Mairin had never heard of such a thing. However, just because she’d never heard
of it didn’t mean it didn’t exist. Not so very long ago, she’d never heard of a calendar roller iron, and now it was her daily
chore.
“It’s true. Once Angela got caught, her gran couldn’t get rid of her fast enough. They’re supposed to set her straight here.”
“This place couldn’t set anybody straight. Everything here is twisted,” Mairin declared. “And so what if it is true about
Angela? That’s no reason not to talk to her.”
“Suit yourself, loser.” Denise offered an exaggerated shrug. “Maybe you can be her new girlfriend.”
That made no sense at all to Mairin, but she dropped the subject, mainly because she didn’t understand it. Kissing and making
out with a girl? She couldn’t imagine such a thing. But the truth was, she did like Angela. Not in the fooling-around-and-kissing
way, but because Angela was sweet and caring and grateful for the smallest gesture. Angela had been the first one to offer
a few words of kindness when Mairin had been thrust among them.
“So what are you in for?” she asked Denise, wanting to turn the subject.
“Go to hell.” Denise stalked away.
Table of Contents
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- Page 23 (Reading here)
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