Page 8

Matty

W aking up well rested wasn’t something Matty was used to. It had definitely never happened when he’d been living in Luca Caruso’s house. Not since Matty had been freed from that place either.

But this morning, Matty felt…nice.

Not exactly like all the damage from countless sleepless nights had been miraculously undone, but less like Matty was clawing himself out of a shallow grave just trying to get out of bed in the morning.

And it was all thanks to his demon.

Matty wasn’t even surprised to find himself cuddled up to a long, lean male body this morning. Nightmare was warm, and he smelled nice, and he’d protected Matty all night long. It was only natural that Matty had migrated Nightmare’s way at some point.

Matty was a little surprised at the…situation the top of his thigh—which he’d at some point hitched up over Nightmare’s lap—was brushing up against.

Matty cleared the sleep out of his throat. He already knew Nightmare was awake. He could feel him watching. “I didn’t know demons got morning wood.”

Well, that was eloquent.

There was a long, slow sigh from above Matty. “You slept well, little human?”

Matty tilted his head to blink up at the demon. With the angle of Matty’s bedroom window and the way the curtains were drawn, Nightmare’s head was still bathed in shadow. Or maybe those were his shadows, the ones who’d tickled Matty’s arms the night before.

Matty directed a smile somewhere in the vicinity of where Nightmare’s face should be. “I can’t remember the last time I didn’t dream.”

A satisfied rumble left Nightmare’s chest. At some point Matty had thrown his arm over Nightmare’s stomach too, but Nightmare didn’t seem to be trying to get rid of him, so Matty let himself cuddle a little closer. The movement had his thigh brushing up against that same…predicament again.

Matty left his thigh where it was.

“You were alone in the Void a long time, right?” he asked. “With just a few other demons?”

That was what Kai had told Matty. That the Book the demons were all summoned with had been lost, and it had just been the four of them—Kai, Nix, Chaos, and Nightmare—in the Void for centuries, unable to return to the demon realm on their own. Just…stuck.

“Yes,” Nightmare confirmed.

“And you didn’t have sex with any of them?” Matty guessed. He thought Kai might have mentioned if any of the demons had been dating, but maybe that hadn’t been the warrior demon’s priority at the time.

There was a longer pause before his answer this time, but eventually Nightmare told him, “No.”

Matty hummed in thought. “Then it’s been a long time for you.”

There was that soft sigh again. Or maybe it was a huff of laughter, Matty couldn’t tell.

“Yes.”

Matty was being pretty damn nosy right now. He wasn’t even sure why, exactly, except that he felt so cozy and protected, and Nightmare was so…odd. Larger than life and powerful enough that it felt like he was outside the normal fear-based restrictions Matty lived by.

What could Matty really do to offend a being like that? Nightmare wouldn’t answer any questions he didn’t want to.

Still…

Matty rested his chin on Nightmare’s chest, peering up into those shadows again. “If I annoy you, just tell me, and I’ll stop.”

There was no pause at all before Nightmare’s answer this time. “You don’t annoy me, little human.”

Matty couldn’t resist snuggling even closer, every inch of his body pressed against the demon in his bed. He’d never cuddled someone like this. He understood why people liked it.

Matty let his thigh brush against Nightmare’s hardness again. “I could help, if you want.”

The body in Matty’s arms tensed, every muscle held still. “Explain.”

“Well, you took care of me all night, so I could—could take care of you. That way. If you wanted. I don’t really know what I’m doing, but I could figure out a hand job, I’m pretty sure.”

Matty might have been inexperienced, but he came from a crude world. He had an idea of what men liked. And Nightmare might not have been a human man, but he seemed to have some corresponding parts Matty was familiar with. By the…shape of it, at least.

What were those pants made of, anyway? Demonic linen? They didn’t hide much, whatever they were.

And Matty knew from overhearing Sascha and Kai these past months that some demons did enjoy sex with humans. Quite a bit, judging from the sound of it. Like, a lot .

“An exchange,” Nightmare said, after a moment.

“Yeah.” Matty nodded, his chin rubbing against Nightmare’s chest. Definitely some sort of demonic linen on the shirt end of things. It was slightly rough against his skin but not uncomfortable.

“There’s no need,” Nightmare told him.

“Oh.”

Matty was weirdly disappointed by that, which was kind of a surprise.

For numerous, life-saving reasons, Matty had pushed down the sexual side of himself for years. No ogling, no flirting, no daydreaming of any kind. Unless it was in the very darkest dark of night, under the covers, when he had occasionally furtively and franticly brought himself to completion.

But cuddling with Nightmare was nice, and it could have been even nicer to really…

touch him. Bare skin to bare skin. He was so big and strange and powerful, it made something clench in Matty’s lower belly just to be near him.

Was that a thing? Were people turned on by big monsters, or was that just Matty being abnormal again?

But the thought of Nightmare calling Matty “sweet” in that low rasp while Matty made him feel good…

Matty shivered. He liked that Nightmare called him that. Matty didn’t feel sweet most of the time. He felt…broken, and kind of jagged, but also weak and useless. Basically the worst combination a person could be.

Maybe all humans were sweet to Nightmare though. Maybe their lack of skull faces and antlers and shadow fingers made them all soft and squishy in his eyes.

“What now?” Matty asked, holding back a sigh. He didn’t want to make Nightmare feel bad for refusing him. He probably just wasn’t attracted to little underfed weaklings who let bad dreams scare them out of sleeping.

“I have fed,” Nightmare told him, and he must have been talking about munching on Matty’s fear all night long. “So should you.”

Finding something to eat. That was reassuringly practical. “I haven’t gotten groceries in a long time,” Matty warned him.

“We’ll go to the market, then.”

“You want to go grocery shopping with me?”

Nightmare made a vague sound of affirmation. “And then you will tell me how to find the men who scare you.”

“Oh, I don’t know how,” Matty told him. Nightmare angled his head down, and now Matty could see his striking face, although his expression was still unreadable. Matty tried for a smile. No change. “I’ve been hiding from them,” Matty explained.

And even with Nightmare here, protecting him, the thought of not hiding—of poking his head out of the sand in a way that meant anyone could find him—was too much to bear.

Matty untangled himself and hopped off the bed, stumbling a bit when the sudden movement made him lightheaded.

He looked down at himself. Oh. That was where all the blood had gone. “Oh, look,” he said senselessly, pointing to his crotch. “I have it too.” He looked back up to Nightmare dazedly. “Maybe I’ll shower before we go, if that’s okay.”

Nightmare inclined his head, his white eyes sort of glowing. He looked…very large, lounging there on Matty’s bed. Even without the antlers.

Oh God, did I really offer to jerk him off?

Belated embarrassment caught up to him, and Matty choked on a cough, turning on his heel. “Okay, bye, then!”

He ran into the bathroom, not sure if he imagined the low, raspy chuckle that followed him.

Matty had thought he was prepared for Nightmare’s human form.

He’d seen Kai go back and forth plenty of times between demon and human. As a human, Kai became a little shorter (relatively speaking) and a little less blue, and he lost the horns and the sharp teeth. He looked different but not shocking.

Nightmare’s human form was…kind of shocking.

It was almost like the negative of a photograph, a darkroom opposite to his demon appearance.

Nightmare’s dark-gray skin became strikingly pale, and his white hair turned jet black, his irises dark enough to match.

Without the shadows, his cheekbones were…

startling. And maybe he was shorter, but it was hard to tell—he was still absurdly tall and slender.

In short, he looked like some kind of fae prince, even if his ears were no longer pointed.

A fae prince with intricate black tattoos running along both forearms, stark against his pale skin, presumably continuing under his clothes.

They were standing at the front door, and Nightmare’s head was cocked as he studied Matty in turn, although the only thing Matty had changed was his clothes. “You’re displeased?” Nightmare asked softly.

Matty’s face must have been doing something weird.

“People are going to be all over you,” Matty told him, maybe nonsensically. He couldn’t stop looking at all the changes. Had Nightmare’s clothes gotten tighter too? They looked more…modern somehow.

“They won’t,” Nightmare said. “My very essence is repellant to humans.”

Matty frowned. “I don’t find you repellent.”

Nightmare gave Matty a look that would have been almost gentle, if sharp, otherworldly beauty could look gentle. “You’ve lived with fear and pain a long time, Matteo.”

Ah. So Matty was broken, and he’d just had it confirmed. That was why he kind of wanted to climb his nightmare demon like a tree.

It seemed okay, though, if it meant Matty could appreciate Nightmare without running in the other direction.