Page 10 of Undesirable (Devilish #3)

Riku hadn’t gone far. At first, he had simply moved to the couch in the sitting room and tried to deal.

When he couldn’t stand the sound of Brownie licking Yuri any longer—they sounded like they enjoyed the experience way too much—he moved to sit on the floor outside their bedroom door.

He listened to Lucifer’s story and the cadence of his voice.

With every word, his chest hurt more. Lucifer had been Riku’s creator’s lover.

Riku was a product of the hatred left over from infidelity.

His entire purpose was to destroy Lucifer.

He would never again get to sink his fangs into the man he loved, and his hopes of Lucifer ever loving him in return died a fiery death.

It was no wonder Lucifer had resented their pairing.

Why had Celeste done this cruel thing? He understood the banishment.

The other gods would rip Lucifer to pieces for being an abomination.

It was one thing for Celeste to create vampires for fun.

Those were easily destroyed. Toys on a chessboard.

But a vampire god? That was powerful and dangerous.

Only his containment would appease them if they couldn’t have his head.

Of course, Celeste would do the only thing she could to save him, but why Riku?

Why would she pair Lucifer with the weapon created to destroy him?

He didn’t understand. However, he fully understood all the implications.

They were doomed to half-lives. It was like they were meant to always have everything be just out of reach.

Just like every time they had made love or been on the verge of it, something went wrong.

Their problems always got in the way somehow. This would never be a proper union.

Riku didn’t even feel the tears running down his face until Lucifer appeared and wiped them away. He plucked Riku from the floor and headed back to bed.

“Until you make your run for it, you’ll still sleep with me.”

Riku felt lifeless in Lucifer’s arms as Lucifer tucked him into bed and then curled himself around him. His wings appeared. One draped over them .

“It’s a real pain in the ass to always keep them put away.”

“You shouldn’t. I’ve always loved them.” He stroked the feathers covering his body.

A soft moan escaped Lucifer. “Don’t start something you don’t intend to finish. I can take a lot of punishment, but we’ve been interrupted a lot lately.”

Riku stroked the wing again. “Does that seriously turn you on?”

“Fuck.” Lucifer dragged out the word, sounding on the edge of orgasm.

Riku risked a peek into his mind. A wave of lust nearly choked him.

Disappointment hit Riku just as strongly.

“I’m sorry you were cursed to a half-life with me.

You’ll never get to have that connection of me biting you, the way other mates have.

Everything has just been so fucking unfair from day one with us.

When I came here, I really thought everything would be okay. ”

Lucifer shoved his hand beneath Riku’s shirt and rubbed his stomach. “Say you don’t hate me, and everything will be okay.”

That confused the fuck out of Riku. “Why would I hate you? You did nothing wrong. Not to me, anyhow.”

“I didn’t tell you about my curse. You didn’t sign up for that.”

“Neither of us signed up for anything. You didn’t ask to be what you are.

I didn’t ask to be what I am. We didn’t ask to be put together.

I can never bite you.” The defeat in Riku’s voice echoed the pain in his soul.

Mating was a very primal thing. This was forever, which was a damn long time when a person couldn’t die. They would always be missing something.

“I would, though.”

Riku blinked at Lucifer’s random comment. “You would what?”

“I’d ask for you.” Lucifer rolled, bringing Riku with him until Riku straddled his body. The move proved his energy level matched the exhaustion in his voice. He couldn’t even be the one doing the holding. He wrapped his arms around Riku as Riku pressed his ear against Lucifer’s chest .

Lucifer kept going. “If we were human, and just got to choose, I still would’ve crossed that club the other night.

I still would’ve watched you all night and then shared every slow dance before going home with you.

You’d never have peace with me stalking you.

Nothing would be different about the way I feel. ”

Riku fought a fresh wave of tears. Lucifer didn’t talk like this.

He was more of an ‘I’ll see you dead before I see you with anyone else’ type of guy.

He didn’t expect Lucifer to be soft. In his position, he couldn’t be.

Demons would tear him to shreds. But Riku was guilty of wanting a little softness just for him.

He craved being special and seeing a side of Lucifer no one did.

Instead, Frost got the sweet Lucifer. That hurt.

“To be fair, I call Frost an idiot pretty often.” Riku cringed.

Sometimes he forgot Lucifer heard his every thought.

Still, Lucifer explained himself when he didn’t have to.

“But he chose to be my friend even knowing who I am. I suppose that’s new for me.

But I don’t feel the same way about him as I do about you.

You should know that. All you have to do is reach inside my head and take whatever you want. That’s your right as my mate.”

He liked to think Lucifer shut him out, so he didn’t have to face the truth.

Riku was scared of what he would find if he looked too closely at Lucifer’s mind.

He wasn’t strong enough to feel the resentment of being paired with him.

Riku had walked away from everything to come here.

He couldn’t look and see his sacrifice had been for nothing.

Stop. What did you walk away from? Heaven?

You were barred from that place because of me.

Wulfe? It’s cold there. Until recently, you kept yourself separate from the townspeople.

Yuri? He’s here and I doubt we’ll be seeing the backside of him soon if Brownie gets his way.

I know you chose a new plane—a deadly one—for me, but fuck.

I love you. Are you telling me you lost more than you gained? If so, we’re doomed.

Riku went still inside at Lucifer’s confession.

Surely, he hadn’t read those thoughts clearly.

Taking risks always worked best with Lucifer.

He would keep doing that. You’re right about Yuri.

That’s not what I meant. I love you with everything I have to give.

Knowing I have to see and feel the disappointment in you every time we make love is killing me.

You’ll always be missing something with me.

I can’t feed you. The confession fell before he even realized how he truly felt.

If Lucifer needed blood, Riku wanted to provide it.

He wanted to be all things to his mate, especially since Riku could never bite him.

Lucifer’s hands ran down Riku’s back before cupping his ass and squeezing. “I think you’re forgetting that I drank your blood to claim you and nothing bad happened.” Not for that reason, anyhow.

Riku’s head shot up. His gaze moved over Lucifer’s face.

For the first time, he forced his way inside and saw that night through Lucifer’s eyes.

The vision of him covered in blood with no memory of what he had done hit him with enough power to steal his breath.

Lucifer’s pain was too much. Riku had to withdraw.

“I’m sorry.” He swiped his lips across Lucifer’s. “I’m so fucking sorry I couldn’t see a path for us before Yuri made things sound so simple.”

Lucifer held him away and stared at him at the confession. He felt Lucifer shifting through his memories. A smile exploded across his face as he brought the memory of Yuri fixing things to the forefront of Riku’s brain. “That’s it. My dog is getting a dog.”

A laugh burst from Riku. It died as his clothes disappeared.

Lucifer never had the patience to undress him properly.

He let it slide. Not only did he know Lucifer didn’t feel well enough to expend that much energy, but he had fallen in love, knowing Lucifer had no patience. It was a hallmark of his personality.

Riku didn’t have to undress Lucifer. He had never gotten dressed again after their disastrous last try.

He wasn’t useless, though. Lube appeared in his hand.

He enjoyed watching the lust grow in Lucifer’s eyes as he watched Riku oil his asshole.

There were some benefits to taking a bit of extra time.

Teasing could be fun. Riku didn’t move fast. He slowly lowered himself onto Lucifer’s waiting cock.

Lucifer’s aroused expression made the torture worthwhile.

He felt the way Lucifer wanted to take control, but he barely had enough energy to stay conscious as it was.

Only his desire to connect with his mate outweighed the heaviness of his eyelids.

Riku felt all of that and took care of everything.

He rocked on Lucifer’s dick, tormenting himself.

He stroked his erection while Lucifer watched.

Riku gave him a show while taking the pleasure he wanted.

His gums itched with the desire to bite and claim his rights, but that would never be.

He had to let that go. Some of his mate was better than none.

Riku would take this over anything with anyone else.