Page 96 of Twisted
“Of course,” I say right away.“I can.But should I…that’s the question.”
“Why not?”
I take another bite of my omelette and look out at the garden.This is the kind of yard most people only dream of.Professionally landscaped and kept.It’s full of beautiful and expensive plants.You could host some crazy parties out here.It’s the kind of life Devon is used to.
Soft.
Easy.
Provided for.
And yet he has the same yearning for something more that I recognize, and my heart aches for him.
“Demon hunting isn’t easy.”
“I figured it wouldn’t be a walk in the park.You’re risking yourself and have to be in pretty good shape to fight monsters.”
“Yeah, but it’s more than that.It can be lonely.Seeing death and destruction can wear on you if you’re not used to it.And getting used to it probably isn’t the best.”I trade my fork for my glass of cranberry juice.“You deserve a good life.A happy life.”
His hand lands on my thigh.“So do you, Wren.”
“I know.”I pull my lips over my teeth and lean back in the white cast iron chair.“Hunting demons makes me happy.It’s part of who I am.”I bend my legs up, making his hand fall off my leg.There’s still a part of me that’s drawn to him.Attracted to the humanity inside of him.But I’m starting to have feelings for Xavier, too.
I’m married to one, expected to reproduce with the other.Good thing it’s not complicated or anything.
Devon just nods and I know we’re both trying to ignore the little bit of awkwardness that’s hanging in the air.
“Do you think vampires have souls?”Devon asks after a moment.“I…I don’t want to lose my soul.”
“I don’t know,” I answer honestly.“It’s something that’s been discussed and debated in the Order.They also don’t think witches or werewolves do, but I feel pretty confident I’m just as human and soul-filled as anyone else.”
“You are human.”He shakes his head.“They really demonize anyone who doesn’t fit their narrative—literally.”
“Most of the population has, historically.And like all of the witches in Salem accused of witchcraft weren’t even real witches.”
“I don’t want to die,” Devon says and his whole body seems to relax after that confession.“Not yet.I want to grow old with someone.”His eyes land on me and my heart starts to beat a little faster.
“That’s how I envisioned my life, too.Maybe retired a bit from the demon hunting.Ya know, only on weekends or when the kids are busy at school.”
Devon chuckles.“You can have that life, you know.”
“Not here,” I blurt, without thinking.But it’s true.Though sometimes what you think you want doesn’t turn out to be what you actually want, and it takes a hard dose of reality to teach you that lesson.Still…it’s what I always imagined.
“You could find a coven,” Devon goes on and I turn, locking eyes with him.“A real coven who can teach you everything you should have been taught.”
“I can’t even imagine that.”
“You don’t have to imagine, Wren.You could do it.”
“Yeah…maybe.I mean, you’re right.I could.”I inhale, close my eyes, and let out my breath.“You don’t want to be a vampire?”
“No.I’ve thought about it a lot.”He nods his head up and down.“I don’t.I want to see the world.Eat food.Feel the sun on my skin.Look at Mabel.She had to watch her own children age and die.That’s not right.”
“It’s not, and no one should take your life too soon,” I say, able to sense his desperation.It’s familiar—too familiar, and it’s making me emotional.My whole life, I've been told my purpose was to rid the world of demons and monsters…to make the world a better place.I’ve been the Order’s perfect soldier, a tried-and-true killing machine.
But despite the bullshit I really do feel like I’m doing what I was born to do.Kill monsters.Save people.
Can I make Devon’s world a better place in a different way?I want to, but I don’t know how.
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