Page 41 of Truth or More Truth (Throwback RomComs #3)

thirty-eight

. . .

I need to play another game of “Truth or More Truth” with Melissa—with me being the truth teller.

I haven’t lied to her, but there are things she needs to know about my childhood.

I doubt what I need to tell her will scare her off if nothing else has up to this point, but I don’t feel like she can fully know me until she knows everything.

And the longer I put off telling her, the more upset she’ll be that I didn’t tell her earlier.

I should’ve told her a few weeks ago in Miami, but I didn’t want anything to ruin our time together. And now I keep putting it off.

I also need to tell her my plans for my career and how it’ll be changing over the coming months.

“Dad, can I talk to you?”

The sight of my daughter standing in the doorway to my office makes me smile. She’s in her pajamas—light pink with bunnies tonight—and looks more like a little girl than she usually does. She also should’ve been asleep an hour ago, but here she is.

“You can always talk to me, baby.”

Kelli glares at me and crosses her arms over her chest as she enters the room and curls up in her green chair. “How many times do I have to tell you not to call me baby?”

I hold my hands up in surrender. “Sorry. Old habits die hard.”

“Well, you need to assassinate and bury that one.”

“Got it. What do you want to talk to me about? ”

“Remember when I said you should kinda retire?”

“I do.” I haven’t been able to think about much else than that prospect and Melissa for weeks. I’m about to tell Kelli some of what I’m thinking when she continues speaking.

“I’ve changed my mind.”

My eyebrows shoot up. “You have?”

“Well, a little bit.” She holds her thumb and pointer finger a half-inch apart.

“What’s the little bit?”

“I still think you need to not work as much and to send some of your clients packing. But I think you should keep all the ones in Chicago.”

I give her an assessing look. “Even Jimmie Zane?” If this is because she has a crush on him, I’m dropping him tomorrow.

She takes a deep breath. “Especially Jimmie Zane. He needs you, Dad. I read this article about him in Hockey Digest ? —”

I hold up my hand to stop her. “Hang on. You read Hockey Digest?” Sure, I subscribe, but I didn’t think my daughter read the host of sports magazines I typically leave scattered about the house. “ Since when?”

“Since I decided to investigate Jimmie Zane.”

“And why are you investigating Jimmie Zane?” I grit my teeth, hoping she’s not about to tell me it’s because she thinks he’s cute or some other such nonsense.

“To try to figure out why he’s always making dumb decisions. I thought it might have something to do with his family, and I think I’m right.”

My jaw relaxes at her comment. “What’s your assessment, then?” This should be interesting.

“Did you know he had a sister who died when she was twelve and he was sixteen?”

“Yes, I know that.” I knew it even before the article she’s referring to. “You think that has something to do with why he is the way he is?”

“I do. Mom thinks so, too.”

I tilt my head to the side as I assess her. “You talked to your mom about Jimmie? ”

“I did. She’s really smart, you know.”

“I do know. You often tell me that’s where you get your brains from.” I move my hand in a rolling motion. “Go on. Tell me more about Jimmie.”

“Well, I know his sister died in a freak accident, though I don’t know what kind of accident, and I also know his parents don’t go to any of his games.”

“How do you know that?” She’s right, but it’s strange she knows it. There was nothing about his parents in the article.

She shrugs. “I have my sources.”

“Oh, really?”

“Mmhm. Confidential ones. Anyway, he says he plays in memory of his sister. But I think maybe his parents blamed him for her death, and that’s why he’s so messed up.”

Her words slam into me like a freight train.

How did I not see this before? I mean, I knew his parents aren’t an active presence in his life, and he considers his current and former coaches and teammates to be his family, though that’s not uncommon in the hockey world, where kids often leave home at an early age to play competitively.

But of all people, I should’ve been able to put two and two together.

Kelli folds her hands together on her lap and sits up straight. “In conclusion, I believe Jimmie needs you because you kinda know how that feels. You can help him learn to be a good person, because your parents were terrible to you, but you’re a good person.”

My throat closes so I’m barely able to choke out the words, “I’m a good person because of you, kiddo. I wasn’t very good before you came along, but then I decided I had to be.”

“Well, maybe you’re the person for Jimmie that I was for you. He can be a good person because you came along for him.”

After I hug Kelli good night and send her back to her room, I spend some time thinking about everything she said.

I’m more certain than ever that I need to tell Melissa about my childhood.

But I’m not as certain about where I want my career to go, because I can’t drop Jimmie now.

Even if Kelli is wrong—and I don’t think she is—if she thinks Jimmie needs me, I can’t let her down.

As I consider what that means for my plans to cut back, I realize I don’t have to make this decision alone. While I had planned to tell Melissa what I was going to do, if I want her to be a permanent part of my life, I need to let her be part of my decision-making process.

Even though it’s well past midnight in Chicago, I pick up the phone. I told her I’d call tonight, and although I’ve been delayed by Kelli’s bombshell, I can’t go back on my word, even if it means waking Melissa up.

“Hey,” Melissa says sleepily into the phone. “I thought you’d forgotten about me.”

“Never.” I kick back in my chair and prop my feet on the desk. “Kelli came in to talk, and then I needed some time to think before calling you.”

“Yeah?” She yawns. “What were you thinking about?”

“About you … me … us … my career.”

“Your career?” I hear sheets rustling on her end, like she’s adjusting her position in bed. “What about your career?”

“Over the past several weeks, I’ve been thinking about the possibility of cutting back on work to spend more time with the people I care about.

” I was going to say “love,” but I’m not ready to use that word yet with her, even though I’m certain it’s accurate.

I love Melissa with all of my being, and it scares the heck out of me but also makes me feel a sense of stability and support I didn’t know I needed.

“And who are these people you care about? Do they include me?”

“Of course. And also Kelli, Diego, Nanette, Ash, Randall, and their wives.” I tick them all off on my fingers as I name them, surprised by the amount of people I genuinely want to spend time with these days outside of work.

“I don’t have enough free time to give those relationships and friendships the attention they deserve, and that needs to change. ”

“Wow, this is big, Bobby Seb. ”

I smile at the new nickname, though I’ll admit I miss “Bobby Joe” a little. “Yeah. It’s huge for me. I’m trying to figure out what it’ll all look like, and I’m trying to anticipate how people will respond.”

“And by ‘people’ you mean …?”

“My clients, their teams, other agents, the sporting world in general,” I explain.

“And you care how they’ll respond?”

My inclination is to give a blanket no in response, but I take a minute to truly think about it before giving an answer.

“I don’t care how most of them will react to the news, and I’ll need to deal with some fallout for sure.

But I care about how my clients will respond—the ones I might need to let go through no fault of their own. ”

“You don’t care about what your peers will think at all?” Melissa asks.

“No.” I bob my head back and forth. “Well, maybe a little bit. I can’t say it won’t sting when some of them inevitably say I couldn’t hack it. But I’ll know the truth about why I’m cutting back.”

“All right. So what does cutting back look like?”

“That’s what I want to get your thoughts on because I’m not sure.

Kelli suggested I keep the guys who play in Chicago and let everyone else go.

That way I only have one city I need to travel to on a consistent basis.

I currently have four guys there, which is a manageable amount and the most I’ve ever had in one city.

But what happens when one of them gets traded?

Diego’s the only one with a no-trade clause, and he intends to play in Chicago until he retires. ”

“Kelli’s been talking to you about this?”

I shrug. “It was her idea to begin with, back when you and I first got together. And Diego has mentioned the same thing, although he wants to be my only client.”

Melissa chuckles. “Of course he does.”

“The problem with that is he has at most five or six years left in him. What would I do when he retires? I can’t do nothing. It’s not in my nature. ”

“No, it’s not. I think it makes sense to keep the Chicago guys.

And if any of them get traded or leave during free agency, you can cross that bridge when you come to it.

It may be years before that happens, and by then, maybe you’ll be in a position where you can travel to wherever they end up.

But I’d like to point out that if you keep all your Chicago guys, that includes Jimmie Zane. You’d be OK with keeping him?”

“That leads to the other thing I wanted to talk to you about.” I tell her what Kelli said about Jimmie.

“Her hypothesis makes sense to me. Do you …” She hesitates before finishing her question.