Page 5

Chapter Five

Poor Maddox. His brain must have almost exploded at hearing Little Fella talk, and his bugging eyes were in danger of popping right out.

I cleared my throat and said, “So remember how I asked about talking lizards?”

“Lizard!” my Little Fella screeched. “Are you being deliberately obtuse, woman? We discussed the fact I am much grander than that.”

“He can talk.”

While Maddox digested his disbelief, I crouched in front of Little Fella. “Yes. Yes, you’re much more than a simple lizard. How could I forget? Blame the fact you had me worried. How are you feeling?”

“Famished. Where’s my food, woman?”

“I have a name, remember,” I admonished. “And there’s such a thing as being polite rather than demanding. You should try it. May I have something to eat, please.” I never thought I’d be the type who’d try and enforce manners, but then again, I’d not met a bossy reptile before.

“I thought servants were supposed to obey without quibble,” Little Fella grumbled.

“I am not your maid. Or your cook. At best we’re roommates, and only because you didn’t give me a choice,” I reminded.

Little Fella lifted his chin. “You should be honored I’ve selected you as my caretaker.”

I rolled my eyes. “Where’s the honor? I get to work all day, then hit the grocery store to feed your hungry ass. On my dime, I might add, only to come home to shrill demands?—”

“I am not shrill!” Little Fella squeaked.

“He’s not repeating things like a parrot,” Maddox murmured. “He’s actually talking.”

“Of course, I am, you large dolt. Exactly who are you? Why are you here?” Little Fella eyed my date suspiciously.

“This is Maddox,” I said for introduction. “He owns the pet store where I got those supplies.”

“The dead bug seller.” I didn’t know a lizard could curl its lip in disdain.

“Not his fault he didn’t realize you wouldn’t enjoy them. And you should be nice. When you wouldn’t wake up last night, he drove out to check on you.”

“I was fine,” was Little Fella’s short reply.

“I know that now, but I worried when you wouldn’t wake up.”

To my surprise, Little Fella’s face softened. “Your concern is appreciated but unnecessary. Molting is something I will do several times until I achieve my proper size.”

“Which is how big?” I asked.

“Remember the dinosaur movie we watched?” This time he smiled for sure as he added, “If fed right, bigger.”

I cringed. “That will cause some issues.”

Little Fella misunderstood. “Your home will obviously not be adequate for much longer. But fear not. I shall find us a new place to live with ample space for my growing needs.”

“Who says I’m going to live with you? And the issue I was referring to had more to do with keeping you hidden from public scrutiny.”

“First, servitude is for life, so yes, you will be accompanying me where I go. Second, the home I select will have adequate safeguards from the knights and hunters that would try and slay me for a prize.”

Maddox interrupted at this point. “How is it possible you can talk? Where did you come from? Is this some kind of joke?”

Little Fella eyed him and sighed. “Did you not explain anything to the male before recruiting him to be in my service?”

Uh-oh. “First off, I did not recruit him. Maddox is here to visit me, not you. And second, exactly how am I supposed to tell someone, ‘Hey, I found a talking lizard who claims he’s actually a dragon’?” I’d be placed on a seventy-two hour involuntarily hold at the psych ward.”

“Dragon!” Maddox caught the word and gaped.

“Yes, dragon,” Little Fella snapped. “Try and keep up.”

I felt bad for the man and offered a recap that included the truth in all its insanity. “After the volcano erupted, I found this big stone and tossed it in my firepit. Little Fella here?—”

“Stop calling me that!”

“I will when you choose a name,” I growled right back. “Now don’t interrupt for a second while I explain to Maddox.”

“Bah. While you do that, I’m going to eat. I smell something interesting.” With that, Little Fella waddled to the fire pit and the leftover Mexican food. I wished I’d eaten one more churro because I highly doubted he’d leave any.

A stunned Maddox watched him and murmured, “I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”

“Nope. As I was saying, the volcano spewed a rock onto my roof, I put it in my firepit, and poof, he ”—I pointed—“appeared. Stole the steak right off my plate. Ate the whole thing, which was impressive, because he was smaller than you see now.”

“I thought you found him days ago.” Maddox glanced at me.

“I did. He’s probably a third bigger than when we met. He eats way more than I do and gets quite testy when I’m late with his meals.”

“I wouldn’t have to be irate if you did your job,” Little Fella hollered before dumping the container of refried beans in his mouth.

“How is it possible he talks if he was just born?” Maddox asked.

“A day in front of the television. Don’t ask me how he learned so quick. All I know is, I came home and he wouldn’t shut up. I did find out a few things, such as his egg was dropped in the volcano by his mother?—"

“I told you, we dragons don’t use that term.”

“Stop interrupting,” I yelled back.

“Insolence,” muttered Little Fella.

“He’s a dragon.” Maddox stared at him with a frown.

“So he claims. Says that, along with increasing his girth, he’s supposed to have wings, too.”

“Another molting or two and you’ll see.” Little Fella finished the savory part of our meal and discovered the churros. And by discover, I mean he took one bite and the rest vanished.

“This is a lot to take in,” Maddox stated.

“I know. I’m sorry. If it helps, I honestly thought I might have been imagining things until you heard him too.”

Maddox rubbed a hand over his jaw. “What are you going to do with him?”

“She will serve me as I need,” Little Fella declared before flopping on the heated stones ringing my fire.

My lips pursed. “He seems to think I’m going to be his personal maid.”

“He’s not shy, is he?” Maddox observed.

“Not one bit. Bossy, too.”

“You do realize if word gets out about him, you’ll have trouble.”

“Then you best not speak of me in taverns, lest the hunters find out I am here,” Little Fella chimed in, showing he was still listening.

“I won’t say a word,” Maddox promised. “However, it just takes the wrong person seeing or hearing him and you’ll have more than just the curious on your doorstep. I wouldn’t be surprised if the government swoops in to confiscate him.”

“Assuming he’s not first kidnapped and sold to some rich person who’s always wanted a pet dragon,” I added, because that had been my first thought. “I honestly don’t know what to do.”

“Once again, you will serve me, and my new male servant shall protect me until such a time as I can do so myself,” Little Fella stated matter-of-factly.

“Hold on a second, what do you mean protect?” Maddox questioned.

Little Fella rolled from his warm perch to waddle close. “It is customary for dragons to have a retinue made up of humans. Some as servants to tend to my needs, and others as guards to protect my wellbeing from ne’er-do-wells. As the latter, you shall have to outfit yourself in armor and acquire some weapons. From what I’ve observed of current fighting methods, you’ll need some firearms.”

“Listen here, bud, I am not shooting people,” Maddox declared.

“If guns aren’t your preferred choice of weaponry, then, by all means, use a sword, but my understanding of guns is that their projectiles can travel great distances.”

Seeing Maddox overwhelmed, I chose to step in and divert the conversation. “How is it you know so much stuff? I mean, I can kind of wrap my head around you learning English by watching television, but you know all kinds of other things, things about dragons that you shouldn’t. Like the thing about them having a retinue or how many sheds before your wings will pop out.”

“We are hatched with the knowledge of our maternal progenitor.”

My eyes widened. “You have your mom’s memories?”

“No. Personal incidences and interactions are not passed down, but anything they learned is. Language, customs and culture, the facts of our biology. It is all there for us to access.”

“Genetic memories,” Maddox murmured. “I know there’s been some studies on certain species that seem to indicate it’s possible, but not to this extent.”

“That is because dragons are much more evolved than the rest of the beasts in this world.” Little Fella puffed his chest. “Now, after such a fine meal, I must evacuate and rest.” With that, he waddled to the trailer door and waited for me to open it.

But I had a question. “Exactly where are you planning to shit? Because I’m telling you right now, I am not cleaning up after you.”

Little Fella eyed me with annoyance. “I am not an untrained animal. I use a chamber pot of course.”

“Chamber pot being?”

“That thing you call a toilet. Now, open the door, woman.”

Without hesitation, I let him inside only to silently curse.

Fuck me. He had me trained as his butler already. I returned to the fire and a stunned-looking Maddox, who remained standing and staring at the trailer.

“Holy shit,” the man exhaled. “Never thought I’d meet a talking lizard.”

“Don’t you mean dragon?”

“No fucking way.”

“Is what I said.” I inclined my head towards the fire. “Time for another beer?”

“Might need more than one,” Maddox muttered as he flopped back in his seat. “This is some insane stuff.”

“You don’t say,” I replied, handing him a bottle from the cooler filled with ice.

“Do you really think he’s a dragon?”

“Who knows?” I took a swig and swallowed before adding, “Doesn’t seem so far-fetched when you consider everything else. I mean, he literally hatched in fire.”

“What are you going to do? A dragon, heck even a talking whatever he might be, is a huge deal. There’s no way you’ll be able to keep him if folks find out.”

“I’m aware,” I replied with a grimace. “It’s only been a few days, and I’ll be honest, I hadn’t thought that far ahead. Like I said before, I was worried I hallucinated the whole thing.”

“At least your property is remote. You’ll have a chance to keep him under wraps for a while but if he gets to be dinosaur-sized…” Maddox shook his head. “You won’t be able to hide him.”

“Or feed him.” I snorted. “Already he eats twice as much as me.”

“He ate everything. Meat. Vegetables. Grains.”

“Anything but bugs,” I said with a laugh. “You should have seen his reaction when I brought those crickets and stuff home. He looked utterly disgusted.”

“He certainly inherited a commanding manner. And here I thought Princess was arrogant. What do you think he meant when he said he’d find you a new home?”

“I don’t know. That’s the first he’s mentioned it. I am not moving into a cave, though.” Because wasn’t that where dragons usually laired?

“Do you think there are more eggs lying around?”

“Little Fella claims his mother would have only placed one per volcano. Something about not sharing territory.”

“And that would have been how long ago?” Maddox asked.

A frown creased my brow. “I don’t know. Never thought to ask.”

“Why would he declare me his protector? We just met.”

“Well, you do look like the type of guy who can hold his own in a fight.”

Maddox’s lips pursed. “Fair point. I am pretty good with my fists. Had no choice but to learn because a guy my size tends to draw the wrong kind of attention and assumptions, especially in bars once other dudes have had too many beers. But a slugfest with a drunk is a lot different than what your little bud seemed to be suggesting. I’m not going to jail for your pet. No offense.”

“None taken, and I’m with you. While I’d like to keep him out of nefarious hands and labs, if the white coats show up at my door and demand I hand him over, I won’t really have a choice.”

We talked a bit more about Little Fella before Maddox rose and stretched. “I should go. Princess will be freaking I missed her ten o’clock feeding.”

“Seems like you’re already a servant,” I joked.

“I am.” He paused. “Despite the oddity of the evening, I really had fun. Do it again?”

Wait, he’d not been scared off by my talking mini dragon? “I’d like that.”

“How about I cook for you at my place tomorrow?”

I glanced at the trailer. “If I don’t come home from work, he’s liable to eat everything that’s not glued or hammered down.”

“He’s welcome to join us.”

“In that case, I’ll grab him after work.”

“Which is a big round trip for you. How about instead I swing by late afternoon and pick up your Little Fella.”

“What about your shop?”

“I’ve got to come out this way anyhow to grab a delivery at a ranch. My part-timer, Suzy, will be watching the store while I’m out.”

A part of me wondered if I could trust Maddox. At the same time, it was kind of too late now, since he knew my secret. Given the dragon was already out of the bag, I could see only one possible reply to his offer. “What time’s dinner?”