Page 16 of Tide and Seek (Dr. Maxwell Thornton Murder Mysteries #8)

I scowled. “Even though it was inside my house and I’m the one who pays the security company?”

“Yep. Like I said, it’s now tied to the case.

You could request to see it, but the police don’t have to release it to you, especially not immediately.

But it doesn’t hurt to ask. They might allow us to view it under supervision.

Or they might decline entirely until the investigation has progressed. ”

I sighed. “If we want to try and see the security footage, you should be the one to ask Deputy Gonzalez. He was pretty friendly with you. I don’t think he liked me much.”

“Oh, I’m sure he liked you just fine,” Royce said.

I smiled at his attempt at reassurance. “It’s okay. I don’t need him to like me.”

“Well, I like you, Max.”

I shrugged. “That’s all that matters.”

Royce moved closer, draping his arm around my shoulders.

He led me toward the windows that looked out over the beach.

The late afternoon sun hung low over the Pacific as we watched the crime scene techs in their navy windbreakers methodically working through their final procedures.

The yellow crime scene tape still fluttered in the breeze, a grim reminder that something awful had happened out there.

The coroner’s van had taken the woman’s body away ages ago, and the lead detective, Hartley, had left a note on my front door informing us he’d be by tomorrow to interview Royce and me. I was sorry we’d missed him. I’d have preferred to get that interview over with.

“Did you really want to stay in tonight?” I asked, leaning my head on Royce’s shoulder. “Or were you just saying that for Luke’s sake?”

“I want to stay in,” he said quietly. “I want some alone time with you, Max.”

“I want that too,” I admitted.

“How about I grill tonight?” he asked suddenly, looking down at me with a teasing grin. “Are people allowed to grill their own food around these parts?”

I laughed. “Yes. I’ve never grilled anything, mind you, but C.J. used to invite me over for barbecues when I stayed here.”

“I knew I liked C.J. She’s down to earth.”

I sighed. “Everyone likes C.J. She’s the best.”

“So far, she’s my favorite of your neighbors,” Royce said, adding quickly, “Although James seemed perfectly nice.”

I smiled. “He is nice, but I understand why he’s not your favorite.”

“I prefer him to Luke.” Royce laughed sheepishly, tightening his arm. “But if I’m completely honest, it’s hard to think of you with anyone but me. I don’t want to picture that. Not ever.”

His tone was more possessive than usual, but I didn’t mind.

Royce could be almost too easygoing about things.

He trusted me implicitly, which showed maturity and it was appreciated.

Even so, I didn’t mind the idea he might be a little jealous.

Who didn’t like hearing how much someone wanted you? Needed you?

I turned toward him, wrapping my arms around his narrow waist. His brown eyes were warm, but that possessive quality still shimmered in them. “I hate the idea of you with anyone else too,” I said softly. “I’ve never loved anyone the way I do you, Royce. Not even close.”

Looking pleased, he lowered his head and kissed me gently. His warm mouth was familiar and yet exciting. I never tired of kissing Royce. I never tired of being with Royce. Because of him, I was a better person. I wanted so badly for him to be proud of me.

When he lifted his head, he said, “We should probably finish the inventory list.” He sighed. “We need to get it over with.”

“Or…” I smirked. “We could go upstairs and inventory what’s in my pants.”

Royce laughed, looking surprised. “That’s a decidedly un-Thornton-like thing to say, Max.”

I couldn’t help laughing too because he was right. “That’s because when I’m with you, I don’t feel like a Thornton. I… I feel alive. I… I feel happy. That’s all because of you.”

His smile was a little poignant as he said, “You have no idea how glad I am to hear that.”

Once more I got the feeling there was something bothering him, but he was holding back. “Royce,” I said softly. “If there’s anything you want to talk about, you can. God knows you listen to me enough. I’d hate to think you don’t realize you can tell me anything.”

He pressed his lips, avoiding my gaze. “Oh, I’m just in my head a bit lately.”

“Okay.” I nodded as if I understood what he meant, but then added, “What… what does that mean exactly?”

He smiled. “It means I’m overthinking things and acting like a fool.”

I studied him. He was trying to make light of things, but instinctively I knew I should push a little. If something was worrying him, I wanted to fix it. “What kind of things are you overthinking? Is it about us?”

He pinched the skin between his eyes and gave a self-conscious laugh. “God, this just isn’t like me.” He dropped his hand, shame glinting in his eyes. “Yeah, it’s about us.”

“What is it?” Uneasiness fluttered through me. “Is it bad?”

“It’s not bad.” He hesitated. “If… if I’m honest, Max, I’ve been feeling a little insecure. That’s not like me and I’ve hated every second of it.”

I frowned. “Insecure? About what? My love?”

He sighed. “Not exactly. I know you love me. I guess I just worry sometimes you might regret giving up this life to be with me in Rainy Dale. It’s not unreasonable for you to maybe regret leaving this all behind.”

I blinked at him. “Leave all what behind? Loneliness? Working too hard?”

“Come on, Max, you know what I mean.”

“No, I really don’t.” I frowned. “Do you mean the stuff money can buy? Because if that’s what you mean, I promise you, it falls far short of what I have with you in Rainy Dale.”

He studied me, looking skeptical.

“Have I not made things clear enough?” I wrinkled my brow. “I’m not always the best about saying how I feel. Maybe I should have been more vocal about my feelings. Especially if you’re questioning how I feel about you. About us.”

“I know you love me, Max—”

“Yes, but I don’t think you understand what loving you means to me.

” I swallowed hard. “The truth is I… I never even knew what happiness felt like until we got together. You think I’m exaggerating, but I’m really not.

Happiness wasn’t anything I even thought about. Certainly not in my personal life.”

He said nothing, his face tense.

“My father pushed me to be the best. To succeed at all costs. But the reality is, all the money, power, and prestige I had, it didn’t make me happy.

” I winced. “God, that sounds so cliché, but it’s true.

I liked that I was really good at my job, but I had no personal life.

I never looked forward to anything. It wouldn’t have occurred to me to do that.

I didn’t even realize how empty my life was until I moved to Rainy Dale.

Or, more to the point, until I met you.”

“But you’d leave Rainy Dale if we weren’t together,” he said.

“Yes,” I rasped. “Of course I would. I’m not there because I love Rainy Dale. I’m there because I love you. I want to be where you are. I don’t care if that’s in Rainy Dale or Siberia, you’re the thing I need to be near. You’re the source of my happiness.”

“Am I, Max?”

I squinted at him. “How can you not see that?”

“But,” he began softly, “I can’t give you fancy dinners, beach houses, first-class tickets. I wouldn’t want you to wake up one day and regret being with me.”

I scowled. “You’re far more likely to do that than me.”

“I’ll never regret being with you. You’re it for me.”

My chest squeezed at his heartfelt words. “Well… I feel the same. I mean, obviously I like things, but I don’t need things. I just need you, Royce.” I shrugged. “To be honest, I can’t stay away. I’ve been drawn to you from the beginning.”

He relaxed a little. “Is that right?”

“You must know that’s true. If I could have kept my distance, don’t you think I would have?” I laughed gruffly. “If not for you, I’d have ditched Rainy Dale a few weeks in. Scratch that, a few days in.”

His smile was sympathetic. “That’s probably true. You were a fish out of water if ever I’d seen one.”

“There’s no probably about it.” I sighed. “Have you ever heard of quantum entanglement?”

“I believe so.” He nodded. “That’s where two particles connect or something?”

“Yes,” I said softly. “That’s it exactly. And no matter how far apart those particles are, they still move in sync. They belong together. That’s how I feel about us. We’re connected. We found each other because we belong together.”

Royce’s eyes gentled. “You can be a real romantic when you want to be, Max.”

I sighed and said softly, “Yet another thing I didn’t know about myself until I met you.”