Page 4

Jane

The warm water was the most relaxing experience I’d had.

I wasn't sure if I’d had one before, but I found being surrounded by warm water soothing.

My green-eyed Master said he wouldn't be unkind, but something nagged me at the back of my mind, telling me to be cautious.

As soon as he undressed me, I shut my mind down and let him bathe me.

It wasn't unpleasant, but it made me feel—something that I couldn't place.

I knew his game.

He wanted me to speak, but the thought of what I might learn and if it unravelled what was left of me was terrifying.

Each time I came close to remembering, it felt like a black hole swallowing me up.

I preferred being Jane.

The name was—safe. Dr. Arin had explained everything to me in terms that I could understand. She was far nicer than my first doctor, who had a temper. I didn’t like the angry voice.

“Time to get out, sugar,”

he said, his voice soft but gruff.

His voice didn't startle me.

Over the months, I learned to keep from reacting to anyone around me.

I wondered if he could read to me.

His voice had a soothing quality to it.

I got the impression he didn't like the name Jane.

At times, he almost hesitated before saying it.

I opened my eyes to see him standing over me.

His eyes dropped to my breasts, and I wondered if he liked them.

I didn't like looking at the marks or my body, but how he looked at me made me curious.

I froze my features as I tried to think if I enjoyed the feelings he created within me or not.

He made my insides tingle, but it didn't feel scary.

He pulled me upright before he lifted me out of the bath.

I wanted to stay in it longer and felt resentful for him taking me out, but I stood still until he dried me off.

I couldn't understand why he was looking after me.

He slipped a fluffy, long hoody over me that covered me to my thighs.

He combed my hair while I kept my hands on my belly to feel the soft, fluffy material.

I almost smiled because it had the same texture as my bear.

The bear was with me in the hospital after the car hit me, but it felt important, and I kept it close.

The police took it away, and I’d felt lost without it.

Dr Arin got it back for me.

I stifled a yawn as he led me out of the bathroom and into the bedroom.

I reached the floor bed and hesitated because I only wanted to sleep with my bear.

“Get into bed.

For your safety, I will lock the door before I leave.

I have some work to do before I come to bed,”

he said as he pulled the covers back for me.

Had I been waiting for him to tell me what to do?

I stepped onto the bed before I lay down. He had so many rooms and beds in them that I didn't know why he had given me this one at the foot of his bed. I pulled my bear into my arms.

“Goodnight, sugar,”

he murmured before pulling the covers over me and Bear.

I watched him switch the light off until the room was pitch black.

When he closed the door behind him, I heard him lock it from the outside.

The lock's sound always scared me, but I didn't know why.

It wasn't any different from the hospital because they locked all their doors, but I’d never shared a room with anyone there. I snuggled into Bear and closed my eyes.

Bear felt nice, but Master’s kind green eyes were nice, too.