Page 152 of This is Why We Lied
“I wanted her to know who I am.”
“Did Mercy know that Gabbie had a brother?”
“I imagine so. They only knew each other for a few months over the summer, but they formed an intense bond very quickly. All of Gabbie’s letters back home were about Mercy and how much fun they were having together. It sounded like—” Paul stopped, searching for the right words. “You know how it is when you’re young and you meet somebody and you just click, and it’s like two magnets getting stuck together? You can’t see how you lived before you met them, and you don’t want to live the rest of your life without them.”
Will asked, “Were they lovers?”
“No, they were just two perfect, beautiful friends. And then it was ruined.”
“You checked into the lodge under a fake name. That would’ve been the time to let Mercy know you’re Gabbie’s brother.”
“I didn’t want her family to find out.”
“Why?”
“Because—” Paul took another drink. “Jesus, that’s terrible. What the hell is it?”
“Illegal.” Faith reached over and snatched the bottle out of his hands. She put it on the floor. She waited for Will to continue.
All he could do was let his mouth work on autopilot. “Why?”
“Why didn’t I want the McAlpines to find out?” Paul sighed as he thought it through some more. “I wanted to keep it between me and Mercy, okay? I wasn’t even sure I wanted to do it, but I saw her and I …”
Paul shrugged instead of finishing the sentence.
Will listened to the silence in the room. He looked down at his hands. Even the injured one was trying to make a fist. There was a bone-deep ache in his jaw from clenching his teeth. His body was familiar with this anger. He’d felt it in school when the teacher berated him for not finishing the sentence on the board. He’d felt it at the children’s home when Dave made fun of him for not being able to read well. Will had developed a trick where he took his mind out of the situation, unplugging it from his body like the cord on a lamp.
But he wasn’t sitting in the back of a classroom anymore. He wasn’t in the children’s home anymore. He was talking to a murder suspect. His partner was counting on him. More importantly, Jon was counting on him. Will had felt the last beat of Mercy’s heart. He had made a silent promise to the woman that her killer would see justice. That her son would know the peace of seeing the man who had stolen her away from him punished for the crime.
Will moved the coffee table back from the couch. He sat directly in front of Paul. “You were arguing with Gordon on the trail yesterday afternoon.”
Paul looked surprised. He had no way of knowing that Sara had overheard them.
Will said, “You told Gordon, ‘I don’t care what you think. It’s the right thing to do.’”
“That doesn’t sound like me.”
“Then Gordon said, ‘Since when do you care about the right thing?’”
“Are there cameras?” Paul asked. “Is this place bugged?”
“Do you know what you told Gordon?”
Paul shrugged. “Surprise me.”
“Gordon asked, ‘Since when do you care about the right thing,’ and you said, ‘Since I saw how she fucking lives.’”
Paul nodded. “Okay, that sounds like me.”
“Gordon said that you have to let it go. But you didn’t let it go, did you?”
Paul worked the hem of his shirt, folding it into tight pleats. “What else did I say?”
“You tell me.”
“Probably something like, ‘Let’s discuss this over a barrel of Jim Beam.’”
“You told me that you saw Mercy on the trail around 10:30 last night.”
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