Page 45 of The Wrong Ride Home (Wildflower Canyon #1)

elena

T he air smelled like rain and thawing earth. April had crept in softly and slowly. The chill lingered in the mornings, but the afternoons were warm enough that I could feel the promise of summer. The pastures were turning green again, and the rivers were running strong with mountain runoff.

The season was changing, whether I was ready for it or not, much like everything else in my life.

“So, you’re not selling?” Hunt leaned back against a Ponderosa pine tree by the paddock where Ben was working the horses.

We had just finished the morning round-up when Duke asked to speak with Hunt and me. He had returned from Dallas two days ago—Fiona was nowhere to be found, and the rumor mill was rife with speculation about why Duke wasn’t selling.

I stood next to Hunt, hands on my hips, staring out at the land that had shaped me and carved me into who I was.

It would remain a ranch—that much was certain.

But I wouldn’t be the one to stay. That had been the plan all along, the only way I knew how to move forward.

So why didn’t the thought of leaving bring the relief it used to?

Since Duke came back, my feelings have been a jangled mess of past and present, anger and longing. I know I should go, but I am not sure I want to anymore.

“Yeah. I’m not selling,” Duke confirmed and then added, “Just because I’m not selling the ranch doesn’t mean I expect you to stay. That’s your call.” His gaze landed on me, steady, unreadable. “But I want you to.”

The words pressed against the tender and raw wounds he’d caused inside me—not to irritate further but as a balm, a comfort.

He wanted me to stay. Or maybe just Hunt?

Yeah, that was probably it. But I didn’t believe that.

The man I’d seen at the rodeo hadn’t been that Duke, the one who’d strutted on the ranch with his girlfriend…

this man, like the one who’d confronted me in the makeshift office, was Duke Wilder, Nash’s son.

I swallowed, glancing at Hunt, who was still very carefully watching Duke. Finally, he asked what we both wanted to ask, “What’s the plan?”

“We keep doing what we’re doing. I will sell my place in Dallas and move here.”

“Your lady moving with you?” Hunt asked pointedly.

Duke looked amused. “Hunt, you made sure she was gone from the ranch house, so you know the answer to that.”

“I wasn’t sure she did.” He tilted his head toward me .

“And why would I care?” I lied.

Hunt snorted. “You need to tell the hands. They’ve been worrying, looking for jobs.

Duke blew out a breath, setting his jaw. “I’ll announce it at dinner.”

Hunt nodded slowly like he was weighing his options. Then he turned to me. “You good with all this?”

“Yeah.”

“You stayin’?” he asked.

I hesitated, kicking at the dirt with the toe of my boot. “I don’t know.”

Duke’s jaw tightened. “Fair enough.”

The three of us stood there, the silence stretching. The only sound was the wind moving through the trees, the distant low of cattle, and the rustling of horses shifting in their stalls.

Spring was coming. Change was coming. And whether I stayed or not, nothing was going to be the same.

“Why did you change your mind?” I asked. I needed to know.

Duke looked at Hunt and then at me. “Two reasons. One, I wanted to do right by Dad.”

He didn’t call him Nash, I noted.

“Second, I want you.”

I gasped.

Hunt chuckled and, as he walked away, said over his shoulder, “I gotta go talk to a horse about a man.”

I looked at Duke as he tucked his hands into his pockets. He rocked on the heels of his boots, waiting for me to say…do something .

“What the heck was that?”

“You asked why I changed my mind, and I told you why.” He grinned cheekily, and he reminded me of the boy who loved me. “I want to safeguard my legacy, not sell it. Being here told me that I loved this land and also reminded me that I never stopped loving you.”

Well shit!

“Duke, I want to be clear with you so there are no misunderstandings. There is no way that you and I are going there ever .” That sounded firm, didn’t it? Yeah, it did.

“I told you I was coming back for you, baby, and was gonna lay a claim,” he drawled. He took two steps toward me and was in my space. He put his hands on my shoulders and squeezed gently. “I hurt you. I know I did. I can’t go back and fix that shit, no matter how much I want to.”

“Water under the bridge,” I lied again.

“Not hardly, Elena.”

I wiggled my shoulders to tell him to lay off, but he wasn’t listening. “Hands off.”

He removed his hands and held them palms out. “I want to tell you what happened. Will you hear me out?”

I growled. Literally growled. “For fuck’s sake, Duke, we have work to do; we can’t all just hang around shootin’ the shit. Okay?”

I was scared of talking to him, of being talked into being with him.

It wouldn’t take much. Honestly! I knew myself.

I loved this man like crazy, and if he crooked his finger a couple of times, all this false bravado would go down the drain.

Now, at least I had my pride, even if I didn’t have my heart, but if I let him back in, I’d lose respect for myself.

My hard-earned equanimity would go out the window, and I’d be left with nothing.

I couldn’t lose all that I was when I’d already lost so much.

“I talked to my mother,” he said as if I hadn’t spoken. “I learned some hard truths.”

I wanted to ask him to go fuck himself, but I couldn’t. He looked sad, and I couldn’t stand it, so I listened.

“Is that why you decided not to sell then? Because you found out Gloria is as crazy as a road lizard in a hot skillet?”

He chuckled. “That’s some imagery, baby.

” Then he sobered. “It’s been hard coming back.

It’s been confusing. I don’t know what’s up or down.

The only things I know are that this land is mine to take care of.

I’m a guardian. I can’t sell it. I don’t think I ever could.

Deep down, I wouldn’t have been able to do it, no matter how angry I was with Nash.

Even if I didn’t know Gloria was as crazy as a…

ah road lizard in a hot skillet . I wouldn’t have sold. ”

I sighed. “I thought you would sell, Duke. The way you…I had no doubt.”

“We don’t know each other well anymore.”

“That’s why what you’re wanting with me is impossible. You and I aren’t the kids we were and?—”

“Tell me you don’t love me,” he demanded, cutting me off.

I swallowed, pulling on all my reserves. “Fine, I…don’t, okay.”

He cupped my cheek. “Say the words. Look at me and say the words.” My eyes went moist, and he groaned. “Fuck, baby. No.”

“Don’t ask…don’t ask, Duke.” I stepped away from him. “I’m nothing but a throbbing wound. I’m…just pain inside. So much has happened, and I can’t love like that…not just you but anyone.”

“I know you can,” he stated confidently. “I know because I can. You think I’ve not been half alive as you have been these past ten years?”

“Oh, you mean between the Fionas of the world?” I said bitterly.

He smiled. “Jealous?”

I threw my hands up in the air. “Oh, go fuck yourself.”

“Nah, I’d rather fuck you,” he replied insolently. “Elena, we will get to know one another. It’s not like we have a choice. Tell me, these past weeks, even though I was being a prized asshole, even though I was with Fiona, tell me you weren’t happy that I was here?

What was the point in lying? I merely shrugged and looked away, irritated.

“Because I’ve lived for glimpses of you. I see you, and my heart lights up like it’s the fucking Fourth of July.”

“Even when you were finger fucking her ?” My words dripped with sarcasm.

He flinched. “Not my finest moment.”

“Oh, Duke, I’ve got other moments of yours that were way less fine,” I threw at him. “Now, I gotta get to work.”