Page 23 of The Warlord’s Princess (Warlords of Tempest #3)

ASHA

The wilds of Melgrim hold an untamed beauty that is as majestic as it is terrifying. The leaves are much like the ones in Penticar, only twisted, some with edges so thin and strong, they could cut through flesh.

“There are burrows hidden underneath these roots,” Ramsey says, pointing to voids along the earth, under enormous trees.

He’d been quiet all morning, refusing to even make eye contact with me, which isn’t like him.

Clearly, he’s not angry, as he has no qualms with expressing that emotion, which means he feels another, likely shame.

There’s no point in dwelling on it, or trying to convince him I’m more than I am. I will always be weak to him, and I’m not interested in trying to prove myself to anyone anymore.

Ramsey grabs a stick that’s about the length of his arm and hands it to me. “Poke these into the burrows, but stand a good distance away, because if you are too close, they could swarm all on top of you.”

I lift my brow at the horror I had not even considered, but I take the stick, deciding not to show fear.

Sucking in a deep breath, I let it out slowly, readying the bag I brought with me to collect the bugs.

You can do this, I tell myself, willing myself to poke forward.

I jab into a black hole, expecting it to overflow with bugs. But none stir. I stab again. Still, nothing.

On the third jab, I take a step forward, pressing the stick in as deep as it will go.

Then, they come.

At least a hundred yellow bugs flee from the burrow, scrambling swiftly in all directions. I take a step back, but several rush across my bare feet, some crawling up my legs.

I yelp, slapping them away, but there are too many, and they swarm everywhere.

I fall, continuing to slap my legs until I slam against the earth.

I hear a rumble from Ramsey’s direction and catch him grinning, but a sharp scowl straightens his lips.

When the bugs have finally cleared, and all that’s left are corpses, I tell Ramsey, “These are different from the ones Nori had.”

“You requested I take you to a grensir burrow.”

“Yes, but these are yellow, and the others were blue.”

He shrugs. “How was I to know whether the bugs in that burrow would be blue, yellow, purple, or red?”

“Do you mean to tell me they come in different colors?”

He nods.

A part of me wants to curse, but I can’t help but wonder if this is a gift, because the dyes from such bugs will be gorgeous.

“I guess I’ll have to continue bug hunting, then.”

Before I can get up, a small creature that looks like a badger comes waddling over to sniff me. Its brown body rotund, with a spike of black hair running down its back. What’s even odder is the fact that his eyes are wide, sitting on its cheeks.

I scratch its head, and it makes a purring sound.

Ramsey growls, raising his axe and taking three steps forward to close the distance between us.

I lunge, covering the creature. “Don’t hurt it!”

“Have you lost your head? That is a felleck! Not only do they smell, but they have a taste for flesh.”

“According to you, I smell.” I ease back, look at the creature he called a felleck, and smile. “And I like the taste of flesh, too.”

“Do you mean to eat the felleck? As he will taste most rancid,” Ramsey snarls.

“No!” I look at the felleck again. “I’m sorry if I did not make that clear.”

“Unbelievable,” Ramsey huffs.

“Animals have always liked me,” I tell Ramsey. “All different kinds.”

The felleck wiggles, having me scratch him all over before sauntering away.

“Hurry and collect your bugs, as I do not want to risk seeing you approach an endergulf,” Ramsey grinds through clenched teeth.

Yep, he’s returned to his normal, Asha-hating ways.

I attack seven more burrows, searching for blue bugs, getting better with each raid.

It’s the ninth burrow that has them, and instead of gasping when they swarm, I giggle, feeling relieved.

Ramsey stands off to the side, watching with a sad smile on his lips.

Perhaps giving myself wholly to him was a mistake, but I was determined to, and even requested more intoxicant to give myself courage.

What was I thinking?

Now I’ll have to deal with him in and around the village, knowing how he’s capable of making me feel.

Knowing that in his eyes, I’m not worthy.

There’s no point in ignoring him or cowering, as he’ll always be a part of my life. I need to show him we can coexist without me melting into a puddle.

Impossible.

Still, I have to try.

Looking over my shoulder, I shout, “I have all I need.”

“Then we must clean them.” He pulls a cup from his bag, filling it with water from a nearby creek.

“The outer shell is what has the color, so all you need do is scrape out the soft center.”

I scrunch my nose. “Yuck!”

“You are the one who wanted to traipse through the forest for bugs.”

“I suppose, but it’s more for Elena than anyone else. I’m making a blanket for her baby and I need their stupid shells.”

“A blanket?” Ramsey scoffs. “The baby will not want for blankets with all we have.”

“In Penticar, it’s customary to give new mothers a gift for their baby. When Grixis found this out, he asked if I could make a blanket such that they would receive back in Penticar, so that he could give it to her.”

He looks down, his expression contemplative. “That is…most thoughtful.”

“After Nori gave me the shells to turn into dye, I had an idea, and I think I know exactly how to weave it.” I hold up a red-shelled bug. “I can’t wait to get back to the village and get started.”

“I will see that you are not disturbed,” he says.

Gone is his flirty banter, replaced with guarded words and awkward silences. Deep down, I knew this would happen, yet I still took him, begging for him to fill me. I thought I could handle what we would become afterward. Which is…what even is this? Friendship?

The worst part is the remorse that lines his face. That I am his regret—his moment of weakness.

I put down the shell I’d been cleaning and take a deep breath.

“Ramsay?” I say, my voice trembling.

He looks up at me, his brow lifting in question.

“I was wrong…”

His eyes scan down to the dead bugs I’ve been cleaning. “Are these not the correct insects?”

“It’s not the bugs, Ramsey. It’s…” A chill runs up my spine, possibly from a ribbon, or maybe just plain fear.

“It’s whatever this is between us. It’s these feelings that swirl around my insides, making me think of you in such a way that makes me blush.

It’s wanting you so badly I want to scream.

” I pause to catch my breath. “But I see the way you look at me. How you’ve been looking at me all morning, like I’m your dirty castle secret. ”

“Asha—”

“Don’t Asha me! I need to say this.”

“Then speak plainly.”

“I love you. It’s nonsensical and cruel, but it’s there.

I love how you look, even if you are blue, and the way you get all growly when you’re frustrated.

I love the way you make my body feel, and how dutiful you are to your tribe.

I love how even though you don’t want us here, you protect us, keeping us safe from harm.

I love you for a thousand reasons, finding more with each day that passes, and I thought I could do this.

I thought I could have you for a night. But I was wrong, because my very soul begs to have you for a lifetime. ”

He looks stunned by my confession, as if I’ve just slapped him in the face.

“You must think I’m foolish.”

She shakes his head sadly from side to side. “I do not.”

“But you won’t have me…”

“I…can not.”

“Is it my weakness that’s the issue? Would strong Meg have sufficed? Or perhaps Fiona?”

“Asha, it was never you. We are from two worlds, and while I understand why our tribes want to join, I cannot do so in the way the others do. Not with you or any of the Penticari.”

“Because we’re weak?” I say, choking back tears.

“Because our differences are great, Little Vaeyark.” He brings his knuckles to my cheek, and I brush it away.

“Don’t call me that.”

He looks off into the distance, giving a curt nod.

“I’d like to be alone.”

“That is ill-advised out in the greater?—”

“Just move away!” I gesture frantically to an enormous rock. “Go sit over there while I finish. It shouldn’t take long.”