Page 48 of The Unraveling of Julia

J ulia entered the testing center, a small, brightly lit room barely big enough to hold a nurse at an institutional desk and a crowd of people sitting in chairs or standing along the walls, looking at their phones.

There had to be thirty of them, and it struck her that even though she was in a crowd, she didn’t feel as anxious as usual.

Her heart beat a little faster, but she wasn’t afraid.

Her mouth was a little drier, but she didn’t want to leave.

She didn’t know why the change, but she didn’t have time to sort it out now.

Julia crossed to the front desk and got in line.

She wanted to confirm that Anna Mattia had been drugging her.

It was likely, given what happened to Bianco, but she had to make sure.

She wanted to know whether her seeing Caterina was a hallucination or real.

The answer felt like a question of her own sanity.

Julia waited her turn, then walked to the desk, where an older nurse looked up with a pat smile. She had a halo of gray hair and wore pink scrubs covered with rainbows. Julia asked her, “Excuse me, how do I get a drug test?”

“Here, fill this out. It’s in English. Then take a number.” The nurse reached behind her and pulled a paper from a series of black plastic trays. “Which test did your employer request?”

“It’s not for a job.”

“How will you pay, then?”

“A credit card.”

“Fine. Take a number.” The nurse gestured to a red plastic number dispenser next to the desk. “Find a seat. It won’t be long. You pay when tested.”

“When do I get the results?”

“Usually in an hour. If you can wait a day or two, it’s cheaper.”

“That’s okay. I’m curious, if someone took a drug two days ago, would it still show in their urine or blood?”

“What type of drug?”

“A psychedelic. Ibogaine.”

The nurse didn’t blink. “I’m not a doctor, but most psychedelics are present for one to three days after intake, at a minimum. It depends on the dosage and the individual. It would show in a urine test, and a urine test is cheaper than a blood test.”

“How long could somebody expect the effects to last? One to three days?”

“That depends on the individual, too. The effects may last longer. There may be traces in the system that are not detectable but still produce effects in the user.”

Oh no. “I see.”

“So. Are you testing today or will you come back another day?”

Julia realized the nurse assumed Julia wanted a clean test. “Today is fine, thanks.”

POSITIVO , read the test result, for which Julia didn’t need a translation.

The results of her urine test were positive for ibogaine.

She stood in the waiting room, staring at the sheet.

Seeing it verified shook her to her foundations.

It made everything that had been happening—that she’d been followed, that Gianluca had been in an accident—so real.

There could no longer be doubt. She held proof that she was being drugged. She just didn’t know why.

She folded the paper, put it in her bag, and left the testing center. She headed through the hospital lobby, her thoughts churning. Sunlight flooded through the windows at the exit, and she went that way. She reached the door and left, then headed for the parking lot.

I want Thy Heart.

Julia heard a voice and stopped in her tracks. She didn’t know where the voice had come from. She’d heard it clearly and recognized it instantly. It was Gianluca’s. She remembered the words from their dinner, when he’d told her the story about divine love.

Julia wondered if it was just the effects of the ibogaine. If the drug could induce a visual hallucination, then it could induce an auditory one.

But she knew otherwise.

She just didn’t know how she knew. Or if she was right, or drugged, or crazy.

She turned around and went back inside.