Page 21 of The Truth Serum (My Lady’s Potions #2)

“But that’s ridiculous!” he said. “Even if it were true, there are enough gentlemen who would overlook such things. Men who want your dowry, if nothing else.”

She jerked her foot out of his hand as she glared at him. “What makes you think I would want such a man?”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I don’t care how you meant it! It’s an impertinent question. I’m not married because I’m not. You’ve no right to question me that way.”

“Keep your voice down,” he said softly. “Your mother’s asleep, but even she will rouse if you yell at me.”

She opened her mouth to argue but then frowned. “How do you know my mother’s asleep?”

Because he’d checked. “Same way I know Fletcher’s gone, and most of the servants as well. For a prestigious London home, there are very few servants who reside here.”

She shrugged. “It is Fletcher’s primary residence. He loves a large staff during the day, but then they all go away at night.”

That surprised him. Fletcher seemed like a man who enjoyed all levels of ostentation, including a large number of servants available day or night. Curious, but Nate hadn’t come here to discuss her brother.

“And you’re correct,” he added, forcing the conversation back to her.

“I have no right to question your choices.” Then he arched a brow.

“And just to be clear, I’m not questioning them.

I want to learn what you’ve been doing these years.

I once thought I knew everything about you. Now, you’re like a different woman.”

“I am a different woman.”

“So let me get to know her.”

She looked at him, her expression softening. He wanted to believe it was yearning, but he didn’t know for sure. Once he knew her every expression. Now, he hesitated to even guess.

“After…” She shifted her position, pulling her feet back until they were primly covered by her nightrail and a blanket. “After we were discovered and Father passed, you disappeared.”

“I was sent away. Fletcher threatened to kill me. My parents feared he would follow through at school.” He watched her carefully for her reaction. Would she dismiss her brother’s rantings? Or did she credit them as serious?

She did neither.

“I was in such a fog of guilt and grief.” She looked down at her hands. “I didn’t come out for a long time.”

“I’m so sorry Becca. About everything.”

“I am, too.” Then she caught his eye. “I don’t blame you any more than I blame myself.”

At least he shared in her guilt. Whereas in his mind, he’d been older and the man. He should have taken better care, but prudence wasn’t something he’d learned until he’d been in a war.

“What did you do?” he pressed. “What made the grief ease?”

“Time. And a sickness came to the village. Everyone’s help was needed, including my own.”

He frowned. “Did you get sick?”

“Yes, but nothing like some of the others. I started working with Mrs. Chenoweth and…” She shrugged. “I stopped feeling sorry for myself.”

“I wish I could have been there. I would have helped.”

She arched a brow at him. “You’d clean up, change diapers, feed the livestock?”

He’d done all of that and more in his life, but much of it came after he’d left her. “I have done my share of farming,” he reminded her.

She frowned then nodded. “I guess you have.”

“How can you not remember these things?” He was a little insulted that he had to remind her.

“I don’t know.” She leaned forward. “I suppose I have heard over and over that you never did anything good in your life. You or your family.”

“You know that’s not true!” At least she’d known it once upon a time.

“I do. I did. I just…” Her gaze grew abstract. “I’m an idiot. I knew it wasn’t true. But they kept telling me things.”

“They?” he prompted. “They who?”

Her gaze tightened back on him. “Fletcher and Mama. Henry doesn’t say much at all. He’s too busy managing the estate, and he was never one to socialize. He’s gone months without saying a single word to me or Mama.”

Her oldest brother Henry could easily be characterized as a hermit. A blind, deaf, and dumb one, unless you talked to him about soil. Then he transformed into a genius who had no patience for anyone else’s ignorance.

But that genius had made the family incredibly wealthy, so Nate had no reason to disparage the man. The same couldn’t be said for the rest of her family.

“You said Fletcher is getting worse. What do you mean by that?” Was she in any danger?

“He’s protective to a ridiculous degree.

I can’t go anywhere or do anything without him.

He tells me what social events I can attend, and the few times he’s not with me, he demands to know who I talked to, and about what.

” She shuddered. “He was never like that at home, but he’s different in London. And I’m getting tired of it.”

“That’s not protective, that’s possessive. He doesn’t own you. You’ve reached your majority.”

She nodded. “Mama says that’s the surest sign I’m a spinster and that I must resign myself to living exactly as I have been for the rest of my life.

” She looked at her hands. “I take care of her. I manage the house for Henry. I help the vicar with the children. And Mrs. Chenoweth is getting old now. I help her a lot.”

That would be a full life for many women, but clearly not for her.

She’d always wanted to travel, to experience new things.

No wait, that was him. He’d always wanted to wander until he’d spent ten years travelling for the Foreign Office.

She’d always wanted to learn useful things.

How to manage a burn, what was the best mash for pigs.

If the clouds looked one way, did that foretell rain or wind?

“Why does Fletcher want you to marry the baron?”

She snorted. “Fletcher wants a seat in the House of Commons. Your brother has the one for our borough. He’s hoping to get the one in the baron’s borough.”

“And you marrying the man will assure that?”

“Fletcher thinks so.”

It was possible. “Is that what you learned with that truth serum?”

He watched as her cheeks pinked, but she didn’t shy away from what she’d done. “No. I already knew that. I wanted to find out what the baron got from this deal.”

“Besides you as his wife and mother for his child? Besides your dowry?”

She nodded. “I wanted to know if he had feelings for me.” She looked away from him then, her gaze going out the window to the night sky. “I shouldn’t have done it, but Fletcher is pressuring me, and I didn’t know what else to do.” She looked back at him. “Is he all right?”

“He’s fine. It took an hour or more to wear off—”

“That long!”

“I stayed with him until he seemed rational. He refuses to believe he beat his naked chest between sets. Called me a damned liar.”

She blew out a slow breath. “Did you take him home?”

“Yes.” He scanned her from head to toe again.

“Are you sure he didn’t hurt you? He’s very strong.

” It had taken Nate plus two footmen to force him into a carriage.

But once there, the man decided to relax and stare into the darkness.

Talked about beautiful lights in front of his eyes, and the glory of breasts.

All breasts, not just Becca’s. And Nate spent the entire ride telling himself it was wrong to punch the man.

“He didn’t hurt me,” she said. Then she touched a hand to the side of her head. “He surprised me, is all.”

“He grabbed you by the hair. He could have—”

“He didn’t,” she rushed to say. “I’m fine.” But the hurried way she spoke told him she’d thought about what might have happened. What was underneath the baron’s normally urbane manner.

“He has a temper, Becca. A bad one.”

She swallowed. “So it would seem.”

Good. She’d figured that out on her own. She’d never been stupid. Except, of course, with him.

“And what will you do if Fletcher keeps pushing you?”

She sighed and plucked at the blanket. “I already told him I wouldn’t marry the baron.”

“And?”

“He lectured me.”

“And when you still won’t? What will happen?”

“I don’t know. He might send me home.” She stared down at her hands. “He’s never been so determined before. At home, I could always delay things until he was gone. I could pretend and—”

“And make him think he’d gotten his way?”

She nodded.

“You’re afraid of him,” he guessed.

“I’m afraid of being sent home. I’m useful there, but it’s not what I want for the rest of my life.”

“But Fletcher’s never been so adamant before,” Nate pressed. “Never this determined?”

“He’s my brother. He’s trying to protect me.” She said the words like a litany. As if she were trying to convince herself, and he hated it. He hated that the girl he’d known had become this shadow of herself, whispering lies as reassurance.

Damn it, he needed her to listen. “Your brothers have never protected you. It’s been you taking care of them. From the beginning, it’s always been you.” Her father had been the one in charge of the family, but when he died, it had all fallen on her. Especially since her mother was useless.

She glared at him. “They’re busy men with a great deal of things to do. And I can take care of myself.”

He leaned forward, squeezing her knees as he tried to impress his next words on her. “That’s right. You can. You don’t need them to tell you who to marry or what to do.”

“I’m not going to marry the baron! I don’t know what else you want me to say.”

He didn’t know either. Or rather, he knew—he wanted her to say she would marry him—but knew that wasn’t possible. At the moment, his hope was that they could be friends.

“You have so much to offer a man,” he said softly. “You are so much more than your dowry. Do not settle for anyone who doesn’t see that. You’d be better off alone.”