Page 18 of The Sweetest Cruelty: Hudson (A Sawyer Brothers Story #1)

There was still a darkness at the back of my mind. A place where my monster lurked when things got tough, but I was getting there.

My therapist explained that these things took time and could not be forced.

Dr Friedkin spoke shit most of the time, but I had to see him weekly, it was part of a court agreement to keep me out of juvie.

A place I had visited a couple of times when I first came to live with Ma.

I was good at stealing cars, so sue me. I used to love going joyriding with my friend Tommo until I went straight.

When I look back at what I put Ma through, ashamed doesn’t touch the sides.

And now that I had semi-straightened myself out, I was the alpha.

I looked out for the family; my brothers turned to me for direction, and that’s what they got. We all had each other’s backs. We got on each other’s tits from time to time, but that’s what siblings do.

In a nutshell, we were as thick as thieves and unbreakable.

My eyes roamed over the lady I called mother. Ma was tall for a woman, and her brown hair was now greying. Her skin also showed signs of age, but her hazel eyes still shone with shrewd intelligence. Ma would be seventy at the end of the year, and we were already planning something big to celebrate.

Bethany Sawyer had been caring for unwanted and unfortunate kids for years, having never had any children of her own.

Ma had also never been in a long-term relationship.

My brothers and I had always found that unbelievable.

Reed said it was because she had stored all her love up for those who needed her the most. Namely, kids like us.

If I hadn’t met Ma, I had no doubts that I would be on a different track in life. And believe me when I say it would not have been a good one.

“About time,” Phoenix said beneath his breath as the front door slammed shut .

I glanced at the empty seat. The noise signalled that Harper was home. As I said, she’d only lived with us for a few weeks, but to me, she was already my sister. The others were getting there, slowly, and as for Nix? Well, I’m not sure how to describe that car crash.

“Ms Sawyer?” Harper shouted. She wasn’t comfortable calling her Bethany or Ma just yet, and it pissed off Phoenix like there was no tomorrow.

I found it amusing to watch. Nix had a great sense of humor and was the funniest of all my brothers, yet with Harper, the dude lost the ability to channel his wit.

We all knew they had a past, but if you built the courage to broach the subject, you had bigger balls than most of us.

And of course, Ma couldn’t break the confidence of Harper’s backstory.

Being the industrious nosy fucker I was, I’d Googled the name Radcliffe and had found some stuff.

There was an old news article about a rich scumbag accountant who set fire to his house after becoming bankrupt.

He’d then turned a shotgun on himself. His entire estate perished with his wife, their pets and a stable of horses, but his daughter had survived.

Her name was Hailey Radcliffe, but there were no pictures of her.

I still wondered if she and Harper were the same girl.

As Harper’s high-pitched voice filtered into the room, the big man himself grunted.

He’d been in a mood all afternoon after that lame-ass fight with Storm in the lunch room.

Harper being late for supper had also added to that.

I could see from the set of his shoulders that he was ready to go head-to-head.

We all knew it too, exchanging looks as Phoenix buttered his bread roll with too much force. He appeared to be rubbing butter through it rather than on it.

“Through here, Harper honey,” Ma said, placing a pile of plates close to Reed sitting opposite me. Ma always took the head of the table and why not, she was our leader—the woman who had saved all our sorry asses.

Phoenix sat on the other side of Reed, and Micah was next to me. This left a space at the other end of the table opposite Ma, free for Harper.

“Hey,” Harper said as she breezed into the room. The girl was like a whirlwind most days. She was a cute redhead with freckles all over her face and body. Harper was always covered up with oversized hoodies and baggy jeans.

Micah was checking his cell under the table as Ma gave him a light tap on the back of his head, a signal for him to put it away and help serve up.

“Have you been to the bowling alley again?” Ma said with a smile as Harper dropped down into an empty seat .

“Yep. I got distracted, and the time ran away from me.”

And within the space of a heartbeat, Nix was on her case.

“Yeah—about that?” he started, all fired up and ready to battle.

Harper turned to glare at him. “About what?”

“What do you say?” Nix added, pointing around the table with the spatula he was holding.

Harper slumped back in her seat and narrowed her eyes at him. She was always such an angry little thing, and Nix didn’t help matters.

“I don’t know. Since you’re the genius, Phoenix, why don’t you tell me what I’m supposed to say?”

“You’re late. Where’s your apology? We’ve been sitting here for ten minutes waiting for you to get your ungrateful ass home.”

Harper huffed, and Ma went to speak but thought better of it.

Harper rolled her shoulders, a flash of guilt crossing her face. “You’re such a jerk. I’ve just sat down. Give me a chance.”

“It’s OK. These things happen. Harper is still getting used to our way of things, aren’t you, sweetheart?”

Harper’s expression lifted as she pulled her gaze away from Phoenix’s cross one.

“That’s bullshit,” Nix snarled, clanging the dish with the potatoes against the side of his plate.

“Language. I won’t have cussing at the table, Phoenix,” Ma said, encouraging everyone to plate themselves up.

Harper smirked, “Yeah, Nix. No swearing at the table. What on earth is your problem?”

“You. Treating this house like a fucking motel.”

“Language,” Ma scolded again.

“Phoenix, cool it,” Reed said softly, handing me what looked like meatloaf. It was Ma’s go-to dish.

The big man sat back, shooting an awkward glance around the table.

Harper sneered, “Wowzer, that’s great, Reed. Can you get him to sit and roll over, too?”

“Alright, guys, please save it,” Micah added as our eyes met.

“Shoot, I forgot the gravy,” Ma said, pushing to her feet. “Try not to kill each other while I’m gone. ”

As she left, Phoenix then carried the fuck on regardless.

It was almost like it was just the two of them, and no one else was in the room.

“What’s so amazing about the bowling alley anyway?

You’re not ten years old anymore,” Nix huffed, using the spatula to roll a mound of potatoes onto his plate.

The boy wasn’t paying any attention to portion size; all his energy was on the fiery redhead giving him attitude.

“And you’re not either, but you act like it.”

There was a choral murmur around the table as the girl had a point.

After a deep breath, Harper added, “I was meeting friends. If you know what they are, Phoenix,” stabbing her fork into a potato from the bowl Nix was holding.

Nix barked, “Friends? You mean those losers from St. Andrew’s?”

St. Andrew’s was the rival school across the city, and bad blood had flowed between us for years. They played dirty football, proper dodgy tackles, and shit.

Harper grimaced and glanced around the table to see if we all felt that way, and we did. The school was borderline juvie.

“They’re not losers,” Harper snapped in their defence.

“I heard their football team is full of them, isn’t that right, Reed?” Nix said, thankfully, passing the potatoes around.

Keeping my mouth shut, I spooned some broccoli next to my meatloaf.

A boy I used to go to school with, Nicholas Creed, was at St Andrews.

He would be a senior like us, and his older brother, Xander, would have left school by now.

Rumour had it that Xander now worked for his father.

I could imagine the type of trade he did, and it wouldn’t have been on the side of legal.

The Creeds were bent, always had been, always would be.

My father had been friends with their father Anton Creed and he had been as dodgy as fuck even back then.

Mr. Creed now owned Chicago’s Nightclub in the city.

Everyone knew it was a front for his questionable business dealings. And what are those, you may ask? Drugs.

“I think Reed’s silence speaks volumes,” Harper smirked.

Reed held up his hands, waving his knife and fork in the air, “Please don’t drag me into your little drama.”

“They talk a big game, but that’s all it is—talk,” Nix grunted.

“Nicky said their team has a history of beating ours,” Harper bragged with her mouth half full. Harper was a sophomore at The Heights, why the fuck was she mixing with boys from St Andrews. Her spouting the name Nicky got my attention and Phoenix’s .

Nix slapped a hand on the table, causing the cutlery there to rattle, “That’s why they choked during the finals last year and, who the fuck is Nicky?”

“Nicholas,” Harper blustered, causing Nix to snigger. Her reply amused the big guy, but drew my eyes towards Micah’s. I raised an eyebrow at my brother, but he just shrugged. Of course, it could have been another Nicholas, but I doubted it. Shit.

“Nicholas, what?” I asked, clearing my throat.

“Creed, I think.”

Fuck.

That surname was not welcome in our house. In the past, Micah and I’d had beef with the Creed boys. Nick on the field and Xander off it, after trying to cover for his fowling shit of a brother. I also remembered Nick from primary school and he was a cock back then.

“Nicholas Creed? What type of shit name is that? Sounds like a proper douche.” Phoenix and Reed hadn’t been on the field the day we had clashed with Creed.

There was a brief pause as Ma clattered in the kitchen.