Page 59 of The Surprise Play (Nolan U Football #3)

ELIZABETH

We drive back to my dorm in silence.

Well, me sniffing and whimpering, clutching Wily’s leather jacket as I vacillate from guilt at yelling at him to utter justification. He couldn’t stand there saying he got it.

He doesn’t get it.

Sienna probably doesn’t get it either.

How could they possibly?

They don’t know what it’s like to be surrounded by people yet completely alone.

There’s no way they’ve been pointed at, laughed at, whispered about on a daily basis.

They don’t know what it’s like to have everyone in your class conspiring against you to pull off a “hilarious” prank that’s funny for everyone but you.

Pausing at the intersection, Sienna steals a look at me. I just happen to look up at the same time, and her sad smile makes me feel like shit.

I turn to stare out the window, a fresh wave of tears taking me out as I relive that horrible moment in the den when I locked the door and turned to find Team Evil 2.0 all standing in there.

It was like my personal nightmare come to life.

They spotted me at the same time, their surprise at my interruption turning to narrowed glares of triumph.

The way their eyes glinted as they approached me was terrifying, and I whipped around, scrambling to unbolt the door, but Kelsey’s hand slapped against the wood while Viper Girl fisted my jacket and tried to wrench me around.

Jade got in on the action, tugging on my jacket until it was falling off my shoulders.

Kelsey cackled, leaning against the door and fisting the fabric so my hands were cuffed behind me.

“Please just let me go.” I wish my voice had been stronger, but my heart was lodged in my throat, making it impossible to be. “Just let me go,” I whimpered.

“Nice singing.” Jade’s eyes were glinting in a way that made my stomach drop down to my knees. “Everybody just loves you, don’t they?”

I swallowed.

“If only they knew the truth.” Her scathing glare traveled down my body then, her mocking snicker like a slap to the face. “That you’re nothing more than a fat loser whose mommy has to make her pathetic clothes because she can’t afford to buy any at a store.”

Reaching for my neckline, she scratched my skin with her red-painted talons before fisting the fabric and yanking on it.

I gasped, relieved the precious outfit Mom had made didn’t tear. It dug into my neck and really hurt, but it hadn’t actually torn. “Please just let me go. ”

“Get some scissors.” Jade smirked at Viper Girl, whose look of gleeful delight made my stomach pitch.

“No!” I tried to protest, wrestling against Kelsey’s hold on me, but she used her shoulder to shove me back against the door.

Jade jumped in, pushing me hard while Viper Girl rummaged through the desk drawers and, much to my horror, found a pair of scissors.

“Yes!” Her triumphant gloating was as ugly as the expression on her face when I started crying and wrestling in vain.

They didn’t relent, using their pointy knees and scratchy nails to pin me to the door so Viper Girl could snip the neckline, and Jade could finally have her satisfaction.

The tearing fabric was no doubt music to her ears.

As was the wail I released when I gazed down and saw my mother’s hard work torn to shreds and my bra and pudgy waist exposed to the room.

“Ewww, gross.” Kelsey looked me over like I was a blob of pus while Viper Girl started snickering and shaking her head.

Reaching for the bottom of my skirt, she cut and slashed with those little scissors until my poor poodle was sliced in half. The ripping of that pink fabric as she tore it apart decimated a piece of my soul.

I’m not sure I’d ever felt more broken than in that moment.

“Now he’ll know the truth.” Jade stepped away from me. “Now they’ll all know.” Smirking at me, she raised her chin at Kelsey, who finally let me go, but not before yanking the jacket off my wrists and shoving me away from the door.

The lock unbolted with a loud click and I stared at the handle, knowing I had to make my escape. But the idea of walking out there in my tatters was beyond humiliating. Pulling up the torn fabric with trembling hands, I tried to cover myself as best as I could.

The girls started to laugh at my lame attempts, and I had to get out of there before they did any more damage.

But how?

I couldn’t even remember how I did it. I think my mind has already blanked out that harrowing escape through the house and into the shadows of the garage.

Zander and Sienna’s special sleepout.

Shit.

“I’m sorry I invaded your space,” I quickly murmur to Sienna, figuring I can at least get that out to the way.

“That’s okay.” Her voice is gentle. Kind. “I don’t mind. I’m glad you could go in there to gather yourself for a second.”

I can’t help a humorless laugh.

Gather myself?

I’ve never felt more untethered in my life.

“I’m so sorry this happened to you at your birthday party.”

A sigh rattles out of me. “This is why I never have them.”

“What do you mean?” She glances at me, her voice surprised but sharp, her gaze intelligent. Alert.

I’m not gonna be able to pull the wool over her eyes.

And I don’t even want to .

I honestly have nothing left right now. My humiliation is complete, so she may as well know the truth.

My face bunches, my voice starting to wobble all over again. “Ever since I was a kid, I’ve just… struggled with people my age.” I sniff. “I don’t know why Jade decided to make me her target, but?—”

“Wait, was she one of those girls tonight?” Sienna’s voice pitches in surprise.

I nod.

“You know them?”

It takes me a second to answer, but eventually I manage to confess. “We grew up together. Jade and me. Fledgling’s a small town, and none of our parents moved away, so we were just in each other’s lives. Everybody knows everybody in Fledgling.” My voice is raw. Hollow.

Sienna pulls the car into a parking space outside Buckley Hall and leaves the engine running so the heater stays on. Turning to face me, she silently tells me to continue.

I have no idea why I do.

I never tell anyone this stuff, but my insides are shattered. Fragile. And I can’t seem to stop myself.

“She and her friends were a year below me in school, but they had enough influence that they managed to turn most of the student body against me. Even the kids who probably would have been nice to me were too afraid to show it. I was their favorite sport, you know? They didn’t want to come within firing range. ”

“Did you tell anybody?” Sienna softly asks.

I shrug. “I tried at first, but a little harmless name-calling? I was the one who needed to toughen up, you know? Grow a thicker skin. Sticks and stones and all that shit.” My voice rings with a bitter edge, but I can’t help it.

“They knew how to put on their pretty smiles when they needed to and make me feel like I was blowing things way out of proportion.”

“That sucks,” Sienna mutters. “I can’t believe… the adults in your life didn’t do more.” Her voice is softly cautious, like she’s not trying to insult my parents, but she’s pissed off that they didn’t act more assertively on my behalf.

“I didn’t tell them everything,” I explain.

“I didn’t want my parents to worry. Me hurting hurt them, so I just tried to ignore it.

Keep to myself, play the safe game, and on those days they got me…

try to keep as much of my dignity intact as I could.

” I sniff, slashing a tear off my cheek as my insides recoil at the few times I did try to break free.

Like when I took a risk and helped Peyton Feldman with his homework. What an epic backfire that was.

And now Wily’s become another one.

Shit.

He means a million times more to me than Peyton ever will. Why couldn’t they just let me have him?

Why does Jade always want what I have?

Why can’t she just leave me alone!

Sienna’s quiet sadness seems to permeate the car, and for some reason, I talk into it. Like, it’s here already, so why not make it a few degrees colder, a couple of tons heavier.

“When I came here, I thought I’d be free of them.

And last year, I had the chance to breathe for the first time in years.

I didn’t make any close friends or anything, but…

I could walk this campus without looking over my shoulder all the time.

” My voice catches and my chin starts to bunch.

“And then this year, I spotted Jade in my first week back, and she had these new friends… who are just like her old ones.” I shake my head, my voice turning into a squeak.

“I thought she was going to college in Denver.” I start to cry in earnest. “And I haven’t been able to tell anyone, because I don’t want my parents freaking out.

It was horrible for them watching me go through this in high school.

They tried to protect me but didn’t want me hiding away from the world, you know?

So I just had to keep going. And I made it.

I thought I’d made it.” I whimper. “But Jade is always so strategic. She knows how to wait and pounce when the timing is just right. When her pranks can do the most damage. And she just has this way of convincing everyone to go along with her.”

I cover my face, my shoulders shaking as I let out a couple of keening wails that turn into gut-wrenching sobs.

“Oh, sweetie,” Sienna whispers, wrapping her arm around my shoulders and resting her cheek against the top of my head.

I let her hold me because I can’t stop crying enough to pull away from her.

She doesn’t say anything, just squeezes my shoulder and stays the course until my tears are under control.

With my stomach jerking, I sit up and reach for the door handle. “I should go.”

“I can walk you up to your room.” Sienna’s already out her door, not taking no for an answer .

I really don’t want her to, but when she helps me out of the passenger side and then wraps her arm around my shoulders again, I take it.

We shuffle up to my room together, taking the elevator in silence and not saying a word until I’ve unlocked my door.

I peer into my safe space, sadness sweeping through me as I picture Wily in here. His big body and bright smile used to fill this room so easily.

I don’t know if it ever will again.

Will he honestly want me after I yelled in his face like that? I basically screamed at him.

Squeezing my eyes against the heavy dose of regret, I then have to counter the tidal wave of humiliation that follows.

How am I ever going to look him in the eye again?

I’m mortified.

Those girls destroyed me tonight.

And they know it.

And Wily knows it.

“Hey.” Sienna rubs my back, getting my attention. “Can I get you anything? Do you want a shower or just to go straight to bed? What can I do for you?”

“Nothing,” I croak. “I’ll be okay.” I let out a dry, wispy laugh. “I always am.”

Sienna shifts to stand in front of me, gently holding my shoulders. “It’s okay not to be.”

Her eyes are so sweet and tender, her face the picture of sympathy.

I look away from it and shake my head.

“What those girls did to you tonight was completely unacceptable. That wasn’t a prank, it was outright cruelty…

and destruction of property, I might add.

” Her tone gets deep and sharp. “The way they tormented you all those years. That can’t stand,” she clips.

“Wily will not put up with that shit. And neither will I.”

I can’t help a scoff. “There’s nothing you can do. There’s nothing anyone can do.”

“Yes, there is.”

“No, Sienna.” I step out of her reach, crossing my arms. Wily’s jacket is huge on me, and my hands disappear into the sleeves before I tuck them under my armpits. “Can you just go? Please.”

She gives me a reluctant frown. “But?—”

“Please.” I’m begging now, and I don’t even care. I just need to be left alone.

With an unhappy sigh, she moves for my door, pausing to ask me the worst question ever. “What should I tell Wily?”

I shrug, not even sure what to say.

“He’s going to be worried about you.”

My chest hurts, my belly jerking. “He shouldn’t have to put up with it. He was trying to do something really nice for me, and it blew up. Things around me always blow up.”

“Not because of you.” Sienna’s voice is strong with conviction. “It’s because of them. Not you.”

Dipping my chin, I can’t respond.

I don’t have the energy to disagree with her.

I’m not a fighter, and those girls proved it yet again tonight.

“I’ll figure out something,” Sienna softly murmurs. “Take care of yourself, okay? ”

I glance up in time to see her kind, sad smile one more time before she disappears out the door.

It clicks and automatically locks behind her while I sag onto the edge of my bed. Covering my eyes with my hand, I suck in a few shaky breaths, then start crying all over again.