Page 188 of The Surprise Play

I force myself to really think about that as I inch toward Wily’s room.

My lips twitch, this pleasant sensation cooling the itch on my skin, working like a balm as I gently knock on his door.

There’s no response, so after a long, polite beat, I knock a little harder.

“I told you guys I’m fine. Can you please just fuck off already! I’ve had the shittiest night, and I need some fucking sleep!” Wily’s roar makes me flinch, and I bulge my eyes at the wood, trying to decide what to do.

Don’t leave! Don’t you dare leave!

Forcing my body to stay put, I lean toward the crack in the door and say, “Wily. It’s me.”

There’s an instant fumbling, a thud, and a scrambling of feet. I step back as the lock clicks, and then the door jerks open to reveal a wide-eyed Wily, his blond hair sticking up at all angles, his bare chest heaving as he grips the door and stares down at me.

“Are you okay?” His voice is so soft and tender, it’s like a physical caress, and it makes my lips curl into a watery smile. The concern in his blue gaze is melting me.

“Yeah.” I nod.

He gives me a pained frown, reaching for me, then thinking better of it and running a hand through his hair instead. “Shit, Satch. I’m so sorry that I?—”

“No,” I quickly interrupt him. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me. It’s me and my shit.”

Wow. I’ve never said anything like that before, and it feels surprisingly good. Who knew honesty didn’t have to be so terrifying?

I swallow, staring at his chest as I force myself to keep thinking, mulling, fighting for what I want. This morning is certainly full of revelations, and it’s kind of overwhelming, to be honest. But I’ll hate myself if I turn back now. And so I stand my ground and?—

“Are you breaking up with me?” Wily’s voice is strained, like saying those words is causing him physical pain.

My eyes dart to his pale expression, and I instantly shake my head. “I don’t want to.” I quickly look to the floor and mumble, “But I understand if you?—”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” He grabs my wrist, pulling me into his room and flicking the door shut with his foot. “Of course I don’t want to break up with you.” Opening his arms wide, he comes in for a hug, but I take a quick step back, holding up my hand.

“Why?” I ask.

I have to know.

I have to hear him say it.

He gazes down at me like I’m weird, and I force myself to keep looking at him.

Tipping his head, he rests a hand over his heart and lightly pats his chest. “Because I love you.”

Oh my gosh, his voice! It’s so raw and rough. So sexy I can hardly stand it.

Swallowing down this swell of desire, I gnaw on my bottom lip and feel this tremor run through me.

“Wily,” I squeak, then suck in a quick breath and force myself to say the rest. “I need you to tell me something. And it needs to be the absolute truth, okay? Please. You have to be totally honest with me. Even if you think it might hurt me.”

His eyes narrow like he’s trying to figure out where I’m going with this.

I keep looking at him, silently begging him to please just agree. To let me have this.

Finally, he nods. “Okay.”

“You swear?”

“I swear.”

“Okay.” I take a ragged breath, nodding and pinching my bottom lip before shaking out my hands. “Okay. So… when you look at me… when you tell me you love me… I mean, why do you say that? What… what do you see? When you look at me…” My voice starts to shake, and I have to expel a breath before I can finish. “What do you see? And remember, you have to tell me thetruth.”