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ARIA

A lpha Roman just returned. There was an attack. Alpha Roman returned. Attack.

The words played over and over again in my mind as I pushed past Estelle, something akin to blind panic coursing through my veins.

My heart pounded like a war-drum, beating desperately against my ribcage to keep my body moving despite the cement-like weight that settled over my chest and made it impossible to breathe.

Estelle called after me, but I didn’t hear her words. If Roman had returned, then surely Malik was back, too. There was a perfectly reasonable explanation why I still couldn’t sense him through our bond… Wasn’t there?

When I broke through the door into the clinic’s main treatment room, chaos surrounded me. Half a dozen healers stood around a single bed, where a familiar male bled over the white sheets.

Roman.

Gruesome injuries plagued his naked body. Someone had raked their claws over his chest, reducing the skin and muscle to barely-attached ribbons. Blood caked the alpha’s hairline, and vicious holes peppered his body where canine teeth sunk into flesh and tried to rip him apart.

My eyes widened at the sheer gruesomeness of his injuries before flashing to every other bed in the clinic. Malik was nowhere to be seen.

In fact, none of the other warriors who went on the days-long patrol had returned, either. Only Roman.

I struggled to pull air into my lungs, slowly turning back to the hospital bed where Roman writhed in pain. Absently, I shot an arrow of awareness down the sacred bond connecting my soul to Malik’s and… Nothing.

It still existed, but only darkness waited on the other side. No trace of the male I loved. The sire of the child in my womb. My mate.

My control slipped, and I stormed across the clinic floor, spearing directly for Roman. A loud shout ripped from his throat as one of the physicians poured a disinfecting elixir over his tattered chest.

He never saw me coming.

“ Aria!” Estelle protested, but I ignored her and shoved through the circle of medical staff.

“Where is he?” I seethed, teeth clamped to the point of pain.

“A-Aria…” Roman’s eyes cracked open, his lips still twisted in agony. He gasped, struggling to catch his breath.

I had half a mind to push my index finger into the nearest gouge-mark on his shoulder, if only to make him hurry up and answer the question. “Where. Is. He?”

As if speaking out loud had become too hard—too painful—for him, Roman’s voice filled my mind. We were ambushed. The rebels in Mendosia attacked while we slept...

Nausea roiled up my throat, saliva coating my tongue in a bitter taste. That didn’t answer my question. He wasn’t answering my question. Why wasn’t he answering my question?

“I was the only survivor,” Roman rasped at last. “I’m sorry.”

I blinked.

Only survivor.

The words hovered over me, not quite touching for several long moments. I took a small, unsteady step backward and shook my head. “N-No… No, there must be a mistake.”

“Aria,” a vaguely-familiar male voice called. One of the healers I’d worked with over the past few weeks placed a hand on my shoulder. “We need to treat Alpha Roman. Help or leave.”

I didn’t move, keeping my eyes on the alpha alone. “ No. I don’t believe you. Roman, your brother—” Someone started to haul me backward. “Tell me it isn’t true! Malik isn’t—” I couldn’t speak the word. “I would know!”

My words became a garbled mess, desperation causing my voice to rise in pitch as they forced me away from our alpha. Another nurse immediately took my place, blocking Roman from view. My vision became hazy with tears, my head light as I lost the ability to breathe—to function.

“I’ll take her,” Estelle’s gentle voice echoed somewhere behind me.

“Get her out of here,” someone growled as I struggled against my captor. The pressure on my chest became unbearable, and I was certain I’d crack in half. I wanted to crack in half.

Estelle’s comforting arms enveloped me, and I nearly crumbled to the floor.

Somehow, she managed to pull me away from the chaos of the main room and into a private room they used for more intense procedures.

As soon as the door shut behind us, she released her hold on me, and I fell into a heap on the floor.

Curling in on myself, my body trembled as I clutched my stomach.

I didn’t believe it. Malik couldn’t be… He wasn’t …

The bond remained. I could feel our bond. I just couldn’t feel him.

“Be strong, Aria,” Estelle murmured, rubbing comforting circles on the center of my back. “Malik’s child will need you to remain strong.”

His child. A ragged sob ripped from my chest, and I shook my head again and again.

“Calm now,” she coached, a note of urgency in her tone. “This is not good for your health, my dear.”

Not good for my health? I wanted to scream at her that I didn’t care. That my health—my entire life— was forfeit the moment Malik’s heart stopped beating.

Precious weeks. I’d been given precious weeks with my fated mate, and I cursed the Moon Goddess for taking him from me. I’d damn her to the deepest ring of hell if I could, just so she might experience a fraction of the pain I felt in that moment.

When I failed to calm, Estelle stood, and I became faintly aware of her rummaging around in the drawers and cabinets behind me. I remained a trembling, sobbing lump on the cold hard floor. She returned to my side a moment later.

The resounding pain in the center of my body nearly blocked out the sharp pinch at my neck as Estelle injected me with some serum. When the darkness settled over me, I cried Malik’s name.

I woke in a vaguely familiar bed.

They’d taken me to Malik’s quarters in the pack house rather than the cottage. I knew because I’d already awoken thrice before, only to be injected with the sleep serum when the pain became too much to bear once more.

This time, a certain degree of numbness thrummed in my chest. I felt disconnected from myself, like my body remained in the physical realm while my soul floated a thousand miles away. With Malik, no doubt.

Dead. He was gone.

It was the only explanation for the utter absence on the other side of our mate bond. I’d come to the conclusion that the chord between us still existed for the sole purpose of guiding my soul back to his when I joined him in the afterlife.

Slowly, I pushed into a seated position. My eyes ached, swollen and red from endless grief. My limbs felt stiff and weak, scarcely capable of holding my torso upright in bed, and my throat scratched from nights spent mourning his loss.

A figure at the corner of the room shot up. Gio. “Miss Aria, you’re awake!”

Through the fog in my head, I recalled that the young man had been sitting in the same chair each time I woke up over the last few days. He was stoically devoted to his cause of protecting me—the last order that Malik gave him.

Malik. A fresh wave of misery washed over me, but my eyes were no longer capable of producing tears. I clutched at my stomach, at the baby that I prayed still grew there despite my neglect, and tried to speak.

“W-water,” I croaked, looking to the bedside table where an untouched glass waited for me. I extended a hand, but my fingers trembled and couldn’t grasp the cup.

“Of course.” Gio rushed over, taking the glass for me and bringing it to my lips. “Careful. Estelle said to begin slowly.”

The room-temperature liquid wet my lips, a single mouthful sliding down my throat and soothing the rawness. I tried to guzzle another gulp, but Gio gently pulled the glass away and set it on the side table once more.

“I’ll tell Estelle that you’re awake,” Gio reported. “She’ll want to come check you, then I will bring you a plate of food. ”

The trembling threatened to pick up again, but my stomach groaned at the mention of food. That was a good sign, I supposed. “H-How long…?”

Gio seemed to understand my question. “You’ve been sleeping on and off for four days. The pack is in an uproar, preparing to go to battle against the Mendosian rebels.”

The Mendosian rebels. The territory that Roman claimed had defected from the Intonat Nocte Pack’s sovereignty. The ones who supposedly slaughtered Malik and the rest of the patrol, leaving only Alpha Roman alive.

I dipped my chin in a nod. I’d gone numb, unbothered by the thought of war. If the Mendosian pack truly murdered my mate, they deserved whatever fate waited for them.

“Estelle will be here soon,” Gio murmured, pulling one of the blankets higher over my waist, as if that might quell my tremors. “I’ll go fetch the food.”

Again, I nodded, never quite looking the young soldier in the eye. Soon, he swept out of the room and left me alone once more. I stared blankly ahead, seeing but not seeing the thin layer of dust covering the wardrobe on the opposite side of the room.

Though the space lacked any of Malik’s personal belongings, if I inhaled deep, I could smell his comforting scent lingering in the air.

Slowly, I rolled onto my side, burying my face in one of the pillows and breathing him into my lungs.

The familiar combination of mint and tobacco leaf simultaneously broke my soul and soothed the shattered pieces.

A knock sounded at the bedroom door, but I didn’t rise, even when the knob turned. I assumed Estelle had come to run her check-up.

Except, the footsteps were slow and heavy, and the air in the room shifted.

I looked up in time to see Alpha Roman stop midway between the bed and the door.

He wore a t-shirt and jeans, though bandages peeked beyond his t-shirt and up his neck, where the worst of his injuries had been.

Faded green bruises marred his symmetrical features.

Gio said you’d woken up, he said through our pack bond, his voice a painstakingly gentle echo. It sounded wrong.

I glared at him and seethed. “Get out of my head.”

I didn’t want to hear him in the place where I’d last heard Malik, as if using the mental bonds to speak to others might override the memory of him.

His eyebrows rose in surprise, but he heeded my growled order. “I wanted to check on you. To answer any questions you might have and…” Roman cleared his throat. “Estelle told me that you are with child.”

Instinctively, his mention of my baby set me on edge. My muscles tensed, readying to fight to protect my young. Without Malik here to protect us, it would not be unheard of for Roman to try to dispatch of his brother’s heir to safeguard his own line of succession…

As if he could read my unease, Roman’s eyes flared wide and he lifted both hands in the universal sign of surrender. “ Goddess, I will not harm you, Aria. Despite what you believe, I’m not a child-murderer.”

I didn’t believe him, nor did I relax.

His throat bobbed. “Malik saved my life. We were attacked while we slept, completely overpowered. We fought them off for as long as we could, but…” He trailed off, and I swore I saw tears well on the surface of his eyes.

“He saved me. Gave me enough time to escape the rebels and run home. And in our last communication…”

I felt sick. I didn’t want to hear more but also hung on to every word. I couldn’t detect deception in his voice, but I’d also never been skilled at reading liars.

Roman lowered his head. “He asked me to protect you. To keep you safe and cared for, as if you were my own. ”

Emotion clogged my throat, a strange combination of fear and heartbreak and revulsion. I hated every word that Malik’s brother spoke, but if he spoke the truth… Did Malik truly ask Roman to protect me? Is this really what he wanted?

“You’re lying,” I whispered, my voice a hoarse shell of itself. “You hated Malik, and you hate me.”

He blinked. “I did many things I’m not proud of, but I owe Malik my life. The least I can do is ensure that his mate and child are safe.”

The bitter taste in my mouth worsened. “I will not stay here without him. I-I can’t. Let me return to my father.”

“This was his dying wish,” Roman answered, his voice remaining even and calm. “He knew there would be a target on your back, since there are those who are loyal to me who would hunt you and your child down to prevent any question about the line of succession.”

I shook my head, but he continued. “If I accept you as my Luna and assume the child as my own, no one will question a thing.”

Clamping my eyes shut, I drew my knees into my chest as if that might hold me together and keep me from breaking. I would’ve lost my stomach many times over if I had any food in its depths.

“I’d rather die than be your Luna,” I whispered, a single tear spilling from the corner of my eye as I glared at him.

A muscle in his jaw dipped, the only sign of his displeasure. “And what of your pup?”

His words hit me like a blow to the gut, knocking the air from my lungs. Was that a threat? A gentle reminder?

If I refused his offer, I sentenced the child—Malik’s child—to certain death. This babe was all I had left of him.

To protect it, I could endure anything.

“You swear to protect this child with your life?” I held his gaze, and the sincerity within his eyes did little to quell my innate hatred for this male.

“Like my own.”

Slowly, I rose from the bed. The soles of my feet prickled and ached as I took small steps toward Roman. When I reached him, I extended my hand between us. I didn’t flinch when he took it.

“Then I accept.”