CHAPTER FOURTEEN
A lexandra’s fingers tightened on Nicholas’s arm as she marched him down the corridor.
Her heart thudded wildly—not with nerves, but a wicked ache she refused to name.
There was something about the man’s dark eyes, that brooding silence and storm-wrapped soul, that drove her mad with thirst. And yet, he was a brute, stubborn as a mule and twice as rude, which made her want to slap him half the time.
But right now, he needed to be a father—not a war general, not some haunted shadow of a man. She shoved open the nursery door, letting warm light spill into the hallway behind them. Charlie sat near the hearth with a wooden horse in his lap, looking up in surprise.
“Charlie!” Alexandra called cheerily, dragging Nicholas forward. “Yer da’s goin’ to read ye a story.”
Nicholas stopped like he’d hit a wall, and Alexandra caught the flicker of panic across his face. His lips parted, but no sound came out. Charlie, meanwhile, froze mid-play, his little face going pale. Alexandra felt her chest tighten at the fear in the boy’s eyes.
“Ye’ll do fine,” she whispered to Nicholas, then walked to the low bookshelf by the window. She scanned the worn spines, plucked one out with a satisfied nod and turned back.
“Here.” She pressed the book into his hands. “Ye just read it. Nothin’ more.”
Charlie looked between them wide-eyed, clutching his toy like a shield. Alexandra crossed the room and patted the wool rug near the fire.
“Come now, lad,” she coaxed gently. “It’s just a wee story. I’ll sit with ye.”
Charlie hesitated, then shuffled forward, settling on the rug beside her. His legs crossed awkwardly, and his fingers kept fidgeting with the frayed mane of the horse. Nicholas stood there like a man waiting to be struck.
Alexandra arched a brow. “We’re waitin’, laird.”
He cleared his throat, stared at the book as if it were written in Latin, then dropped stiffly onto the chair by the hearth. Opening the cover, he frowned down at the page.
“Er… once upon a time, there was a… big, —” He stopped, coughed. “—beastie who guarded a glen.”
Charlie blinked. “What’s a beastie?”
Nicholas looked up, his mouth working silently. Alexandra bit her lip to keep from laughing and said, “A beastie’s a creature. Go on, Nicholas.” Her tone was laced with challenge.
“Aye, well,” Nicholas grunted, looking back at the book like it had personally offended him. “The beastie was very ugly… and mean… but nae as mean as the—uh—bairn who threw rocks at its cave.” His voice sounded like gravel, low and unsure. “The beastie roared, but deep down, it was just lonely.”
Charlie tilted his head, interest slowly replacing fear. “Why was it lonely?”
Nicholas blinked again, clearly veering off script. “Because…” He swallowed. “Because it had nay one to talk to. Folk ran from it… thought it was bad.”
Alexandra watched him, something tight and aching blooming in her chest. His voice contained more truth than he likely meant to reveal.
“And what happened then?” she asked softly, nudging him forward.
He flipped the page. “One day, a wee lass came to the cave. She dinnae run. She sat down and told the beastie stories, though he growled at her.”
Nicholas’s mouth twitched. “And the beastie started to change… slowly.”
Charlie’s shoulders loosened. He leaned forward, eyes on the page now, while Nicholas read the rest in a voice rough with rust but steadier. Alexandra sat still beside the boy, letting the moment wrap around them like a soft blanket. When Nicholas finally closed the book, silence filled the room.
Charlie looked up, blinking sleepily. “Will ye read another?” he asked his father in a timid whisper.
Nicholas stared at him for a long moment. Alexandra held her breath.
Then Nicholas nodded once. “Aye. If ye want.”
The boy smiled for the first time that day. It was small, but it hit Alexandra like a punch to the gut. She turned her head slightly, hiding her own smile behind her hand. Maybe the beastie wasn't so far gone after all.
Alexandra watched Nicholas with quiet surprise.
The man who was usually a fierce and unyielding brute had softened before her very eyes, his voice gentle as he read the story to wee Charlie.
She saw a flicker of something hidden beneath his hardened exterior—a tenderness he kept locked away from the world.
It stirred a strange mix of admiration and curiosity in her, making her wonder how many other parts of him lay buried beneath that dark, brooding manner.
Charlie’s eyelids drooped slowly until he finally slipped into peaceful sleep, his small chest rising and falling with steady breaths. Alexandra held her breath, waiting for Nicholas to finish the final act of the tender ritual.
He bent down carefully, lifting the boy in his arms like a feather, moving with surprising grace. Alexandra’s eyes softened as Nicholas laid Charlie in bed, pulling the covers up to his chin with a gentleness that seemed foreign yet somehow natural on him.
Together, they stepped quietly from the nursery, closing the door with soft ease behind them. Alexandra’s eyes twinkled as she glanced sideways at Nicholas, a teasing smile tugging at her lips.
“That wasnae so bad, was it?” she said, voice light but full of challenge.
Nicholas shot her a dry, weary look and muttered, “Readin’ a children’s story was pure agony.” Then, without another word, he strode off down the hall, leaving her to mull over the unexpected scene.
She stood alone, feeling a flush of warmth creep into her cheeks despite herself. There was something undeniably attractive about Nicholas when his guard came down, a raw vulnerability beneath the arrogant, brooding surface.
She had noticed that the lines of his strong jaw softened in the flickering candlelight, and the sharp edge in his eyes dimmed just enough to show a glimpse of the man beneath the mask.
Alexandra shook her head quietly, chiding herself?—
He's a brute, even if a fair-lookin’ one. He is me captor and I must remember that.
Her thoughts wandered to the boy asleep in the room behind her and the man who carried him with such care. Perhaps there was hope yet for them both, if only Nicholas could find the strength to let go of his fear and let her go.
Alexandra walked away, heading to her handmaid's door. As she walked, she smiled softly to herself, knowing she’d never admit it to him outright, but seeing that hidden side of Nicholas was like catching a rare, fragile moment of light in a long, dark night.
And deep down, despite all her frustrations, that moment was enough to stir something fierce and unexpected within her heart.
Alexandra reached Erica’s door and gave a soft knock, her fingers trembling slightly from the weight of the day. The door swung open, and Erica’s warm smile greeted her like a hearth in winter’s chill.
“Come in, lass,” Erica said, stepping aside to let her enter the cozy room. Alexandra sighed quietly, grateful for the small comfort in this strange, cold place.
"How are ye this evenin’?" Alexandra asked.
"Good as can be in such a strange place, I suppose. I was about to come to your rooms to help ye with getting’ ready for bed," Erica said.
"Aye, I think I am exhausted," Alexandra said.
Together they left Erica's room and walked down the hall to Alexandra's bedchamber.
Erica moved swiftly and expertly, pulling at the heavy layers of Alexandra’s traditional dress and cloak, the stiff fabric that weighed her down like armor.
“Ye’ll nae be wantin’ to be wearin’ this for yer shift, Alexandra,” she said gently, folding the thick skirts with care and setting them aside.
Alexandra watched, a bit embarrassed, as Erica helped her out of the bodice and loosened the laces that pinched at her sides. It was a small kindness, but it made Alexandra feel comforted by her maid, who also happened to be the closest she had to a true friend.
"Erica, thank ye for endurin’ this with me. Ye make me feel as though I'm nae just another prisoner of circumstance in this castle. I can bear it if I have ye with me," Alexandra said.
As Erica handed Alexandra a simpler shift, she said "I am glad to be at yer side," with a smile.
The two women settled by the small fire, the flickering flames casting soft shadows across their faces.
“So, tell me, what’s got ye all knotted up the noo, eh?” Erica asked, her voice a soothing murmur.
Alexandra hesitated, then gave a wry smile. “It’s Nicholas,” she admitted, “He’s a hard man, but there’s somethin’ about him that I cannae seem to shake from me mind.”
Erica nodded knowingly, pouring a cup of warm tea from the kettle. “Aye, he’s nae the easiest man to read. There’s fire in him, and sometimes ye find yersel’ caught in the middle.”
Alexandra wrapped her hands around the cup, feeling the heat seep into her cold fingers. “I should hate him, ye ken? But instead, I’m drawn to him, and it frustrates me to nae be able to walk away.”
Erica chuckled softly, eyes sparkling. “That’s the way of the world sometimes, Alexandra.
The ones who vex us most are the ones that can break our hearts or make them dance.
” She took a sip of tea and leaned back in her chair.
“But ye’ve got to be careful, lass. Men like Nicholas carry burdens darker than most can see, and they can drag ye down with them. ”
Alexandra looked down, biting her lip thoughtfully. “I think he’s afraid, ye ken? Of losin’ his son, of hurtin’ the only family he has left.”
She sighed deeply. “I miss me own parents terribly, and I see the way he holds himself back — like he’s protectin’ himself from some danger that I cannae even name.”
Erica reached out and squeezed Alexandra’s hand gently. “Ye deserve more than fear and distance. And as for Charles, well a bairn needs love and time, nae just trainin’ and duty.” Her voice softened with compassion. “And ye... well, ye deserve to be more than a pawn in some cruel game.”
Alexandra’s eyes flickered with gratitude and a quiet resolve. “Thank ye, Erica. It’s hard to keep me head clear with everythin’ shiftin’ around me.”
She stood slowly, feeling lighter despite the tangled mess of emotions still swirling inside her. “I think I’ll try to rest. Tomorrow’s a day full of reckonin’, I fear.”
Erica smiled warmly and stood with her as well, gathering the discarded layers and setting them neatly aside.
“Aye, take yer time. Rest will do ye good.” She paused at the door, glancing back with a teasing grin. “And if ye ever want to talk or need a friend, ye ken where to find me.”
Alexandra returned the smile, a rare moment of peace settling in her chest. “I’ll hold ye to that, Erica.”
The room felt less cold now, the firelight warming more than just her skin. As she closed the door behind her, Alexandra felt ready to face whatever this journey would bring.