Page 56 of The Right Garza
“You don’t remember?”
“Obviously.”
“You stumbled in here at sunrise, complaining about the light streaming in through the windows,” he informs me. “Climbed right under the covers and started snoring.”
“I don’t snore.”
His smile is small. “Yeah, Hellcat, you do.”
“Whatever.” Then, I frown. “There are two other rooms, and I would have had to pass both of them to get here. Why would I have come all the way to this one?”
He watches me for several deafening heartbeats, before he replies, “Ask your subconscious.”
“What?”
“You can consciously make a lot of defensive decisions and excuses, but not only is your subconscious autonomous, it’s alsohonest.”
My laugh is nervous, anxious. “What are you talking about?”
Shifting onto his side, he props his head up with one hand. “What do you want, Lexi?”
“What do mean?”
“Like in general,” he expounds.
Through a light laugh, I tell him, “To not owe you anymore, for one.”
“Okay, say I released you from the debt, where would you go? What would you do?”
My shoulders rise and fall in a shrug. “Who knows. I’m a wanderer, a risk-taker, a hustler.”
“You wanted to be a news anchor,” he reminds me.
“Yeah, thenlifehappened,” I snap, chafed and annoyed. “That ship has sailed.”
“Have you stopped dreaming?”
“Damn straight. What’s the point? Life’s shit. I either make waves, ride waves, or endure the ones that engulf me.”
After a long moment of silence, he says quietly, “A lot of your fire’s gone, Hellcat. Don’t know if I love it or hate it.”
“AndIcouldn’t give two damns what you love or hate.” I straighten up from the bed. “I’m gonna get ready. Are you taking me home or should I call a cab?”
He doesn’t answer, he just stares at me with those penetrating dark eyes. Heated. Loaded.
In my mind, I want to turn and walk out. But physically, I’m rooted, staring back, my breath quickening with each passing second, my stomach tightening.
Again, he asks, “What do you want, Lexi?”
“Nothing from you,” I somehow manage to say, snapping out of the trance he locked me in.
I turn and start to leave, but before I know what’s happening, I’m on my back on the bed and he’s hovering above me, his elbows pressed to the mattress on either side of my head.
“What are yo—”
“I don’t think it’s starting to sink in for you yet—or maybe you’re just willfully ignoring it. But let me be straight:I want you. I’ve always wanted you. I knowyouhave not always wanted me, but I know that…nowyoudo. ‘Cause what I’m feeling right now is too fucking insane to be one-sided.”
By the time he’s done, I’m panting as if I’ve just ran a marathon. “You want to fuck me?” I breathe out. “Is that it?”
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