Page 43 of The Reluctant Billionaire (Love in London #5)

Lotta

It was one of the best evenings of my life, and it had nothing to do with the glamour of the scene and everything to do with letting rip with my gorgeous, sexy boyfriend.

Oh, and it turns out the man can move .

Not that that’s a huge surprise given his mastery of rhythm when he’s horizontal.

Tired I may be, but the vision of Aide, those massive arms crossed behind his head, looking tanned and hairy and fucking gorgeous against the crisp white Provencal linen is a far more compelling siren’s call than sleep.

I undo my robe, letting it drop to the floor, and crawl naked across the expanse of bed towards him.

I’m not sure a man has ever looked more appreciatively at a woman’s body than he’s looking at mine right now.

I crouch over him, loving how his face tilts up to meet mine, and drop a kiss on his lips.

Mmm.

I go to settle on top of him so I can kiss him more deeply, melt into him, but he halts me with a firm grip on each of my upper arms.

‘Not yet.’ He glances from my face to my boobs, which are hanging right there in front of him, and back to my face with difficulty.

‘Why?’

‘Verbal apology first,’ he says, gently manoeuvring us both onto our sides, ‘and then comes the physical apology.’

Oh.

God he’s sweet. It’s probably pathetic, but all my anger and frustration has melted away because he’s here with me, and that’s all that matters.

‘Just the physical apology is fine,’ I say hastily, and he laughs, rolling us further so I’m on my back and he’s ranging over me.

’Nope. That’s not how it works. Though the physical apology will be very thorough.’

I open my legs so he can settle between them. He braces himself on his forearms and I gaze up at him like a lovesick moron. ‘If you’re planning on saying anything, don’t bother, because I won’t be listening to a word you say. Not when your dick’s right there.’

At least one part of him is anxious to be inside of me.

He grins, but it’s pained. ‘Fuck.’

‘Maybe go into caveman mode?’ I suggest. ‘You’re very good at single syllables and two-word sentences when you’re horny.’

His smile softens. ‘Okay.’ He dips his head and rubs his nose with mine before pulling back so he can look me in the eye. ‘How about this? I’m sorry.’

I nod approvingly. ‘Perfect.’

‘And…’ Those incredible pale blue eyes are so intense. ‘I love you.’

The swell of emotion hits me like a rubber mallet over the head. For once in my life, I’m utterly speechless.

I stare at him. ‘I?—’

‘Wait,’ he says. I’ve seen this man smile with pleasure and mirth and affection and all the rest, but he’s never smiled at me like this.

Like he’s holding nothing back. Allowing every last one of his emotions to flood through him.

To show in that smile of his, to shine in those eyes.

And it’s like nothing else. It’s spellbinding.

He’s spellbinding.

And he loves me.

Before he turned up and surprised me, I’d resigned myself to the fact that Aide didn’t choose me this weekend. Not only has he chosen me, but he loves me.

‘Don’t say anything until I’ve finished telling you how I feel,’ he continues.

He’s still braced above me, his forearms framing my face.

He smooths my hair off my temple with the gentlest of touches.

‘Because I’m so in love with you, and I know it’s no excuse, but I think maybe my little stunt the other day was about holding myself back. I freaked out.’

‘Why?’ I ask through my tears. I stroke my hands down the sides of his firm body.

He coughs out an embarrassed little laugh. ‘It’s going to sound ridiculous.’

I lick my lips. ‘Try me.’

‘Well, you’re magnificent. You’re honestly like no one I’ve ever dated. I think the women I’ve gone for in the past have been… needier than you. What?’

I’m trying hard not to laugh. ‘Nothing. Sorry. It’s just—needier? You shock me.’

‘Okay, okay. I have issues.’

‘You don’t say.’ I raise my eyebrows at him.

‘Anyway, you’re definitely not… needy. You’re so amazing, and impressive, and strong.

You’re the most badass woman I’ve ever met—apart from Judy, obviously.

But you seem so independent.’ He shakes his head, and I can tell this is difficult for him.

‘I got hold of my therapist for an emergency chat at the airport, and she said I was probably scared because I don’t know how to show up for someone who doesn’t really need me, and… ’

‘And?’ I prompt softly.

‘And she said something about love language.’ He shifts on top of me.

‘Like, I have this fucked-up view that people love me because they need me, or more like I feel most loved when I’m most needed.

Which is really unhealthy, because I should be allowed to feel loved even when someone’s not bleeding me dry.

‘And I shouldn’t be trying to earn people’s love by, you know, making them need me. She said I’ve allowed some people to manipulate me, but by making myself indispensable I’ve also been manipulating them.’

I stare at him as his face crumples with emotion.

Fuck me, that’s a lot. And it makes me fucking furious to think a human being as full of integrity and generosity as Aide should have fallen foul of this dynamic.

That he should ever have been allowed to get himself to a place where he felt beholden to actively earn love. To keep it.

‘Aide,’ I whisper. ‘I have to tell you something. You’re right. I don’t need you—I don’t depend on you. Not in the way other people in your life do, maybe. But’—I take a deep breath—‘I love you.’

His face is a beautiful mess of conflicting emotions as he absorbs what I’m telling him on top of wading through all the epiphanies he’s been processing these past few hours.

I keep talking. ‘And just because I don’t need you, it doesn’t mean I don’t want you. I’ve looked after myself for a long time. I’m a big girl. But I wanted you with me really badly this weekend. It was important to me.’

‘I know,’ he manages.

‘If I didn’t make that really clear, then I should be apologising, too.

’ I extricate a hand from between our bodies so I can touch his cheek.

‘Everything’s better when you’re here, honey.

I’m trying to make you understand that’s all I need from you.

I don’t need you to do anything for me. I just want you close.

’ My bottom lip trembles. ‘Otherwise I get really, really sad. Because I miss you so much when you’re not around. ’

‘Fuck,’ he grits out low and harsh, his mouth finding mine to kiss me, and God it’s so good. I could easily let myself succumb to this, to his tongue sliding decisively past my lips, but there’s one more point I have to make.

‘Do you see the difference? I want you. I love you. I hate it when you’re not around. But I don’t want to be another person adding to your list of obligations.’

‘You will never, ever be that,’ he chokes out. ‘But you love me?’

I smile against his lips. ‘I do.’

He hums approvingly. ‘The other thing she mentioned was that I was probably self-sabotaging. You know, because of what she said about me being scared to love someone who doesn’t need me.

But she also said it was encouraging that I’d fallen for someone strong and independent.

She said it sounded like you had excellent boundaries. ’

I preen. ‘Did she, now?’

‘I told her they were good, but not as excellent as your tits.’

‘Classy guy.’

‘Fuck, that was a lot of words.’ He bends to nuzzle at my neck.

‘I’m not sure where my caveman’s gone, that’s for sure.’

‘Ug.’

I laugh. ‘You can use your body now,’ I say helpfully.

He grins. ‘I love you.’

And then he’s pinning my wrists above my head and sliding down my body so he can suck on my boobs in the hungry, skilful way only he can.

There’s a lot more to say.

Aide has a lot of work to do on himself. And I have work to do if I want to be there to support him when he acts in his own best interests while nurturing the generous, open-hearted side of him that made me fall so hard.

But words have their place and time. And right now, he and I need to find solace and pleasure and transcendence in each other’s bodies.

He gives my nipple a decadent suck and releases it before collapsing on his back. I gasp at the absence of his mouth.

‘Come here,’ he says, and I pull myself upright so I can straddle him. ‘Sit on my face.’

Oh, God. I look down at him, my pussy clenching at the mere thought of Aide eating me this way.

‘Come on.’ He slides his hands around my hips and gives my bum a little slap. His eyes are burning, his entire face ravenous as he takes in the sight of me on top of him. ‘Get on my fucking face, sweetheart.’

I smile and shimmy forward as he practically drags me up the bed. I hover right above him.

‘You might not think you need me, sweetheart,’ he tells me in a low, possessive rasp, ‘but don’t forget your pussy always needs me, just like it needs me right now. Got it?’

‘Yes,’ I manage. My voice is breathy, and—dammit—needy as fuck.

He’s right.

I’ll always need him like this.

‘Tell me you need me,’ he demands. God, his eyes are practically all pupil.

‘I need you,’ I tell him. ‘I need your dick. My pussy needs your mouth on it. Fuck, Aide, I need you to make me feel good so badly.’

‘Yes you do,’ he mutters. ‘So don’t be shy.

Ride my face.’ He grips my waist, slamming me down onto his face.

His tongue finds my wet centre instantly, and his big hands come up to palm my boobs.

Fuck, his hands are calloused, and the way he drags them over my skin has me arching into them as I push down against his mouth.

The thrusts of his tongue are harsh, fevered, as he laves me.

Fuck , it’s so intense like this. His mouth and my sex are rubbing, pressing, heat coming off us in waves, our wetness combining in a slick slide.

It feels like he’s touching every single millimetre of my needy flesh.

I sit astride him and grind against him, writhing wantonly so my tits and my pussy get every ounce of attention they require.

He wants to be needed?

I’ll show him need so white-hot it’ll drive him over the edge.

I’ve been gripping the sides of his head, I realise. Holding it to my hungry sex. I release it and brace one hand on the headboard for balance while I arch back enough to find his dick with my hand.

Jesus, it’s hard. I slide the pad of my thumb lightly over his crown, smearing the pre-cum around as my fingers grip him. His dick jolts, and his anguished growl vibrates right through my centre before he licks me even harder.

This is definitely the kind of reciprocity I can get behind.

I ride him shamelessly just like he told me to, taking and taking, so flooded with desire and so desperate for release that I can’t think of anything else except rubbing myself against his face until I get what I need.

His ravenous grunts and the slick hardness of his cock in my hand tell me he’s taking too, that he’s every bit as into this as I am.

And when the heat sweeps through me, engulfing me, taking every sense prisoner, I take that, too.

I allow it to splinter my consciousness into a million perfect shards as suns rise and set behind my eyelids.

I cry out Aide’s name and am dimly aware of his muffled grunts of pleasure as I grip him harder and shudder my orgasm out above him.

As soon as the fog of blinding ecstasy begins to clear, I’m pulling away from the grip of his hands and sliding down his body so I can impale myself on his cock.

I’m soaked from my arousal and Aide’s mouth, so when I position his crown right at my entrance and lower myself down, I yield to him more easily than usual.

Still, stuffing myself full of Aidan Fucking Duffy is no mean feat.

I’m reminded once again that my boyfriend is a real man, a real handful, as I breathe my way down his length.

He lies there, his face contorted with hunger, eyes heavy-lidded, hands running up my thighs in encouragement as he watches me fill myself up with him.

And when I get him all the way and sit down heavily, we both moan.

This is where I belong.

This is where he belongs.