CHAPTER SIX

C ael Zephyrus had forgotten that the forest-green velvet curtains in his childhood bedroom never quite shut all the way.

And even though Stoneridge, his family’s lodge in Diachre, was in a near permanent state of gray, the sun still managed to peek through that crack and wake him from another night of numb, dreamless slumber.

He had no idea what time it was. Probably well into the morning. Well into the afternoon, even.

Just as he’d suspected, as soon as he’d returned to these suffocating log-paneled halls, he’d plummeted into one of his episodes.

He blinked as his consciousness slowly returned, bringing with it snippets of a conversation from what felt like eons ago.

I have…episodes. That pit of numbness I mentioned earlier? Sometimes it overtakes me, and I just disappear for weeks at a time.

He tried not to picture who had been on the receiving end of those words. But even covering his head with his pillow and shutting out the weak light couldn’t stop visions of golden curls and emerald eyes from flooding his brain.

Not to mention the torturous memories of what had happened afterward.

Her taste lingered on his tongue, even now. He’d begun to wonder if he’d ever get that sweetness out of his mouth. Or if he’d carry it, as haunting as his lost wing, into this new, unwanted chapter of his immortality.

The things he’d told himself the morning after—that she was better off in the colonies, that she was safer there, that she’d be happier without him—had seemed true at the time.

Now, after a little over a week into this life he’d resigned himself to—one dedicated to duty, to his father, to Brachos—he could admit they were lies.

The door to his room flew open and, before Cael could brace himself, two heavily-muscled knees bracketed his hips and his pillow pressed down on his face.

“Were you always this lazy or did the Vestians teach you bad habits down there in the colonies?”

Erik’s voice was muffled and only Cael’s inability to breathe motivated him to swat his youngest brother.

Erik grabbed Cael’s wrists in one hand and pressed them against his chest, using the other to keep the pillow in place. “Come on, big brother. Fight me off! I know you’ve got it in you.”

Desperation tinged Erik’s taunting words. As if the younger male was the only individual in all of Stoneridge who could see how much Cael was suffering. And the only one brave enough to goad him into returning to himself.

A big part of Cael wanted nothing more than to just lie here and let the pillow steal his breath. But some small spark, one that even in the darkest of his episodes had kept him clinging to life, flared in his chest.

He bucked his hips and pushed Erik off, his sole wing splaying out as he sat upright. Erik untangled himself from the sheets, laughing with relief.

As if he could tell how close Cael was to letting it all go.

Cael climbed out of bed to pull on a pair of dark pants and a loose white shirt. “What do you want?”

Erik’s deep brown eyes—a gift from their mother—glinted with amusement. “Father sent me to get your lazy ass out of bed.”

Cael whipped towards his brother, nearly toppling over. Even though it’d been weeks since he’d lost his wing, he was still getting used to the lack of counterbalance. “Why? He hasn’t said a word to me since I’ve been back.”

Erik crossed his arms, surveying the mess of Cael’s room: the half-eaten plates of food, the empty bottles of wine, the sweat-soaked sheets. “He told me to tell you, using these exact words—” Erik cleared his throat, then let out a bone-chillingly accurate imitation of Arran “— your wallowing is finished , Cael. Fucking clean yourself up and make yourself presentable for our guests .”

Cael snickered, despite himself, and the sound loosened Erik’s shoulders. “What guests?”

Erik stalked for the door, his fleshy gray wings bouncing. “I’d ask if you’ve been living under a rock for the past week, but all evidence in your room would suggest that indeed you have.”

Erik gave Cael a mocking bow as he gestured through the door.

“Your fiancée and her family arrive tomorrow.”