Page 7 of The Lucky Winners

Later, when the DreamKey people have finally left and the light is dropping outside, Dev and I sit in our cosy little living room. The last of the sunlight filters through the wooden slatted blinds, casting long shadows across the floor.

‘So, is it OK with you if I call people to tell them the news?’ Dev says. He has lots of friends and acquaintances. He keeps in touch with mates he met at primary school, which I find incredible. ‘I’ll WhatsApp the footie-group lads.’

‘Yes, and I’ll ring Paige,’ I say, realizing how woeful it sounds that I’ve got only my best friend – my one friend – to call, and that’s it.

‘Meet up here again after and finish the champagne?’ Dev grins.

‘It’s a date.’

In the kitchen, my thumb hovers over Paige’s name on my call list. She’s a good friend on so many levels and she’s always there for me.

But I’ve learned to get ready to brace myself when I have good news.

Like when Dev’s family bought us a second-hand car.

I’d been so excited, gushing about how much easier life would be, but Paige had just smiled tightly and said, ‘Must be nice, having in-laws with deep pockets.’

Or that time they covered the rental deposit on our house. She’d laughed then and called me ‘jammy’, but there had been something in her voice. Something that made me feel I should almost be apologizing for it.

But this news is so out there she’s bound to be thrilled for me. I know it.

I tap in Paige’s name and tuck the phone between my ear and my shoulder, my hands still shaking from the sheer madness of it all. I stand at the window and wait. The line rings twice before she picks up.

‘Hey,’ she says, her voice warm. ‘Can’t manage without talking to me for a day?’

I let out a half-laugh, half-breathless gasp. ‘Paige, you won’t believe this.’

There’s a pause. ‘O- kayyy … go on, then.’

‘I mean it. It’s insane .’

She sighs. ‘I’m listening!’

‘OK. Well … we’ve won the house.’

‘What?’

‘The house, Paige! We’ve only gone and won that bloody mansion in the Lake District!’

Paige says nothing, so I carry on. ‘You remember the prize draw Dev entered? The ticket I told him was a complete waste of money? Well … we won.’

There’s absolute silence at the other end.

‘Paige?’

‘So … this is a joke, right?’

‘I swear on my life. We found out this morning. It’s all real. Reporters, photographs, we’ve had the whole shebang today.’

A beat. Then at last –

‘ Oh. My. God. Merri!’ A little screech bursts out of her and then she’s laughing. It’s the kind of laugh that bubbles up when you can’t quite process what you’re hearing. ‘You’re telling me that you – you of all people – have just won a mansion ?’

‘Yes,’ I say, still breathless. ‘It still doesn’t seem real. But it is. It’s real. Can you believe it?’

‘Er, no! I can’t!’ She lets out another stunned laugh. ‘Bloody hell, that’s totally incredible . Seriously. I’m so happy for you both!’

My chest loosens, warmth flooding in. I feel bad doubting her now. Of course she’s happy for me. This is Paige, my best friend, the person who’s often my unpaid counsellor.

‘Listen. We need to celebrate,’ she says. ‘Let’s meet for a few drinks this weekend, if you can.’

‘God, yes. I need a few strong cocktails after today.’ I rub my forehead, still trying to wrap my brain around it all. ‘I’ll know much more by then. We’ve got to visit the place first, find out all the details.’

‘What will you do about work?’

‘I – we’ve not even talked about that yet. It’s crazy. The DreamKey people have only just gone.’

‘I’m so happy for you, I am, but I don’t think I’ll be able to stand working there without you.’

‘Oh, don’t,’ I say miserably. ‘I can’t even think about leaving you behind. But listen, let’s meet up. Saturday night at our usual place?’

‘Deal.’ She pauses, then says again, ‘Merri. A mansion .’

‘I know.’ I let out a disbelieving laugh. ‘How the hell has this happened … to us ?’

She chuckles. ‘No clue. But I can’t wait to hear every single detail over cocktails.’

Dev swigs the last of the champagne straight from the bottle. ‘So the footie lads want to know if we’ve got a ninety-inch flatscreen yet so they can come and watch the cup final.’

‘No chance.’ I laugh. ‘Paige was so excited. She wants to meet up for a few drinks on Saturday. I love that everyone is happy for us.’

Dev nods and grins, but he’s already staring again at the DreamKey Lake District home on his iPad – the same iPad he was getting ready to sell on eBay just last week.

His face is animated, his cheeks flushed.

His eyes dart hungrily across every millimetre of the screen, soaking in each tiny detail of his good fortune.

Our good fortune. ‘I just … I still can’t get my head around this.

I mean, can you believe it?’ He spins around to face me, his eyes shining with excitement.

‘Our own house in the Lake District! It’s like something out of a fairytale.

I can’t wait to see it tomorrow. I’m picturing the landscaped gardens, maybe even a library …

I’m going to have space for a home gym!’

He flops down on to the couch beside me and looks at me expectantly. Waiting for my face to mirror his excitement.

‘It’s just incredible … amazing.’ I shake my head. ‘Being honest, I’m having a hard time accepting it’s true, Dev. I keep thinking they’re going to come back and apologize that they got it wrong.’

‘No one can take this away from us, Merri.’

I force a smile, nodding as if he’s right.

As if it really is that simple. But my stomach still tightens at the thought of the press coverage, the articles, the pictures – my face suddenly out there.

It’s been years, but cameras have a way of pulling ghosts out of the dark, of sending fresh echoes where they don’t belong.

But there’s nothing I can do without explaining to Dev why I’m so concerned. So I smile wider. Play along. Pretend my nerves are nothing more than disbelief at our luck.

He tilts his head and studies my expression. ‘You have to enjoy it, Merri … every moment of it. This way of thinking you’ve always had, always imagining what could go wrong. Now’s the time to knock that on the head because things are finally going right for us. Things are going to be perfect.’

‘You’re right …’ My voice trails off as I glance out of the window, the last rays of sunlight disappearing behind the houses across the road.

‘It’s just a lot to take in, isn’t it? This sort of thing doesn’t happen to people like us.

Are we sure we want to move? Just think of all the logistics of moving so far away, and there’s work too. And leaving the people we know here.’

He leans back, draping a casual arm over my shoulder.

‘Think about the alternative view – no more landlord breathing down our necks. No more leaking ceilings or catching two bloody buses to work.’ He hesitates, a twinkle in his eye.

‘We could quit our jobs tomorrow, if we want to. We could live in a home most people can only dream of. Why would we give that up?’

‘Yes, but surely we wouldn’t want to do that right away?’ My eyes snap to his, my heart skipping a beat in alarm.

‘We’ll be moving to the other side of the country soon and there’s the cash prize too, don’t forget. A buffer. It will probably all happen very fast, Merri. We might as well keep it simple and start afresh now. I hate that job, you know that. And neither of us is overrun with friends here, right?’

I turn away my face, feeling his hand slip off my shoulder. I can hardly say how much I’ll miss Paige, my only friend. Dev seems to make casual friends everywhere. I don’t.

I look around. Our tiny living room suddenly feels even smaller.

Dev shifts in his seat, his voice quieter now. ‘You’ve been acting weird since the photo shoot. I can hardly believe I’m saying this, but are you seriously having second thoughts about moving into the house?’

‘No. It’s just … This whole thing feels a bit like a runaway train. A good one, I know, but we’ve not had time to reflect on our choices. To talk things through.’

His shoulders relax. ‘It’s a bit unnerving, isn’t it? Everything’s changing so fast. Listen, forget about work for now. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.’

I reach for his hand and squeeze it. ‘We have more than one option, right? We don’t have to move there immediately, and let’s not forget, we could even sell the house. What if we regret acting in haste?’

His forehead creases in confusion. ‘But this is what we’ve wanted for years: a whole new start. Not just with the amazing home we’ll get to live in, but the money . All that tax-free money.’

I sniff. ‘The money won’t last long if we’re not working. We can’t just not turn up. We’ll have to give notice.’

Dev laughs. ‘Why? What are they going to do? Fire us?’

‘Not funny. I don’t want to leave my colleagues in the lurch.’

‘It was just a joke, Merri. Look, I’m not suggesting never working again, but maybe taking some time out to think about what we’d really like to do instead of slaving away in some dead-end job.

It’s a quarter of a million quid, after all.

’ Dev frowns, confusion clouding his pleasant expression.

‘This isn’t a scam. DreamKey are a well-known company.

It’s all above board. We won the prize draw fair and square. ’

‘I know.’ I sigh, relenting a little. ‘It’s just when something this amazing happens, it always makes me wonder if it comes before a fall.

’ I shift on the couch, tucking my legs underneath me, my fingers tracing the edge of the cushion.

Dev watches me, his brows beetling. He’s trying to understand.

But how can I explain a fear that has no shape, and no words to define it?

Just shadows from the past that still cling to me, refusing to let go.

Dev places the champagne bottle on the coffee-table and leans forward. ‘What could go wrong? It’s a beautiful house. And now it’s ours. End of.’

We kiss, and Dev’s fingers trace a gentle line from my cheek to my lips.

‘This is a good thing, Merri … and we deserve it. OK?’

I nod. ‘OK.’

I know the right thing to do is to give myself permission to celebrate and enjoy our good fortune. Like Dev says, it’s true we deserve it.

And I’m not a bad person. Not any more.