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Chapter Forty-Three

THE NEXT DAY

Priest stood before Britain, towering over her. Britain's small hands fiddled with the buttons of his dress shirt as she buttoned it for him. "Relax." She smoothed her hands over his chest, ridding his black dress shirt of any signs of wrinkles.

Priest let out a deep breath. As much as he had convinced himself that he was strong enough to say his final goodbyes to Jamari, the pain was killing him slowly. He did all the preparation for this day and still couldn't fathom it. "I'm good." He nodded curtly, hoping to look as convincing as he sounded.

Britain took a step back, her feline-like eyes locked with his dark ones. "Don't tell yourself you're good if you aren't," she advised him with a warning eye, hoping that if he wasn't okay, he would come out with it and just tell her right now instead of falling weak in front of everyone.

Priest rotated himself around, facing the big mirror that took up a hefty portion of one the walls in his bedroom. He looked himself over, satisfied with his all-black attire and jewelry. Letting out a breath, he ran his hand over his attire, despite the fact that Britain had just done so. "Priest Kanaz Justice," he reminded himself in a faint voice. The reminder always seemed to give him more strength than he started with.

Britain made her way back over to him. She wrapped her arms around him, peeking her head from behind him to look at him through the mirror. "You wanna take a minute for yourself?" Britain offered. She knew how Priest could get sometimes and that being alone could help him gather himself and his emotions.

Priest looked at her through the mirror, his eyes pleading. Slowly, he nodded his head. "Just a minute," he requested with hopes she would intervene in his moment alone if he took too long. He didn't want to jump off the deep end and find himself full of anger while thinking about what he should have done for Jamari instead of what he was doing now.

Britain agreed and stepped in front of him, reaching up to cup her hands around his face. Standing a bit taller in her heels, Britain brought Priest’s head down slightly so they could meet for a kiss. Parting from the kiss, she flashed him a light smile, and he did the same to her. "I'll be back. Take it easy on yourself."

Priest nodded, watching her exit his bedroom and making sure to shut the door behind herself. Giving him the peace to be in his own thoughts, even for just a few minutes, was something he appreciated. Britain's heels clicked down the lengthy hall of the penthouse before she ended up in the front room where Jazzy, J'Ru, and Kaymen were waiting. Assuming Priest had finally made his way out, their attention casted onto Britain.

"He's alright?" Jazzy asked, concerned that her brother hadn't come out yet.

Britain nodded her head. "Yeah, he's fine. He just asked for a moment alone."

"He's just blaming himself in there," J'Ru spoke up with a shake of his head. "I tell him all the time that this ain't on him, but y'all know how Priest is."

"Shit is hard for him. He held little man in his arms while he took his last breath," Kaymen recalled Jamari’s horrific and traumatic final moments.

Britain remained quiet for most of the conversation. She was too webbed in her own thoughts of how she was going to help Priest recover after the funeral. Eventually, Priest came out of his bedroom. His head was held high, and his shoulders were pushed back. He was saving face and being the strong one like he planned to.

"Ready?" he asked everyone as he took Britain's hand in his.

Everyone wanted to ask if he was alright as they wondered whether he was strong enough to head out, but the look that filled his eyes told them not to question him. They all simply nodded their heads and followed him out. The elevator ride down to the parking garage was swift. Once they got to the bottom level, Cyro ushered Priest and Britain to one of the usual SUVs.

Kaymen got into a separate vehicle where Jadey was awaiting his quick return, while J'Ru and Jazzy got into another SUV that was chauffeured by another one of the men on Priest's security detail.

Priest gave Cyro the okay to pull off from the parking garage from the back seat, and the rest of the vehicles followed suit. "I just want to coddle and nurture you, but I know how much you would hate it," Britain told him in a light voice while curling her bottom lip.

Priest chuckled as he laced his fingers with hers. "You know me well."

"I'm gonna do it anyway," she settled as she pulled her hand from his to wrap her arms around him. She nestled his head into her bosom, earning some light laughter out of him. With his head now resting on her chest, she consoled him by running her hand over his waves.

"C'mon, Gioia," he laughed while lifting his head from her chest.

"You enjoyed that. Admit it," Britain poked at him, hoping he would cave. Priest smacked his lips while waving her off jokingly."Who are you fooling, Priest? You're the biggest baby ever." She thought it would be best if she distracted him with some lighthearted conversation before he became filled with the heaviness of saying goodbye to Jamari. Her idea seemed to be working.

Priest waved her off once more. "Get the fuck outta here," he lightheartedly negated her claims.

Britain stale faced him with her arms folded across her chest. "You really want me to embarrass you with Cyro in the car?" She reached over, pressing the button to lower the partition between them and Cyro.

Priest laughed as he swatted her hand away from the button. "My bad, Cy. Some people just don't know how to act," he jested, referring to Britain's infantile behavior. He earned a light nod from an aloof Cyro before he put the partition back up.

Priest let out a joking sigh. "You gonna do this the entire ride, aren't you?"

Britain released an obnoxious cackle. "You bet it," she confirmed. "If I don’t keep you in good spirits, who will?"

A small smile masked his lips before he brought Britain’s hand up to apply a light kiss to the back of her hand. "Thanks for looking out, Paris ," he teased her, earning a joking mean mug from Britain.

Arriving at the church where Tasha wanted the funeral to be held, Priest felt a tightness rise in his chest. Once they got out the car, Priest was pleased to see most of the community had come out to help Tasha put Jamari to rest. Right now, she needed all the support she could get. Everyone gathering in unity would have been exactly what Jamari wanted.

Hand in hand, Britain and Priest ascended the short steps of the church. People greeted Priest, Kaymen, and J'Ru with respect, giving their condolences since they knew how much they cared for young Jamari.They were seated behind Tasha and her family, which was fairly small. Tasha really didn't have much of anyone aside from her older sister, her sons, and her father.She wept silently behind her dark tinted glasses.Priest simply couldn't find it in him to pay attention. It wasn’t that the moment wasn't worthy, but he just couldn't stomach it. Tasha had asked him to say a few kind words about Jamari. She thought there was no better person to do it than the person Jamari looked up to the most.

Rising from his seat, Priest unfolded his hand from Britain's to make his way to the podium. He knew he wasn't the ideal guy to be speaking at Jamari's funeral since many would’ve said he had brought more violence into the neighborhood than he ran out, but he was going to follow through with Tasha's wishes.

With all attention casted on him, Priest cleared his throat. Every pew was filled to capacity, and everyone was waiting to hear what he had to say. Glancing to the left of him, Priest peered at Jamari at rest in his casket. It was odd seeing him so still since he was usually so animated and full of life.

"I just would like to start off by thanking each and every one of you for giving Tasha so much love and positivity during this rough time," Priest began as he glanced over at Tasha who was dabbing her face from the tears that cascaded from her eyes.

"It took a lot for me to get myself to this point of strength this morning. I gotta be honest. I thought about just not showing up, but all I could hear in the back of my head was Jamari saying, I'm holding you to it, Priest ." He chuckled lightly while gently passing his thumb over his nose to keep his emotions in check. "Those were actually the last words he said to me. Me and Jamari had this long-standing bargain that if he made good grades, I would take him anywhere he wanted in one of my rides. We've been doing this since he's been in the fourth grade. He had this crazy love for my cars, and every time he would see me pull up, his eyes would light up, and he would tell me how soon he would be rolling in a whip just as nice as mine," Priest recalled with a light smile.

"One thing I loved about little homie was that he was so optimistic and sure of himself. He had more confidence than me, and I survived it all. He was a strong kid. Kept those grades right, siblings in line, and for damn sure kept me on my toes. He was great, and I'm so blessed and thankful to have experienced life with him. His end story is tragic. I imagined giving a little impromptu speech at his graduation dinner far before speaking at his funeral, but I'm playing the cards how they were dealt. It’s painful, disturbing and heart wrenching that I gotta stand here today, but I knew he wouldn't want anyone one else telling you guys about how astonishing of a person he was." Priest smiled as he once again eyed Jamari.

"Word has gotten out to the media, and they're painting Jamari's murder out to be like every other murder that's happened within the community. That’s not flying with me at all. Jamari wasn't a potential gang member. He was the kid who made his own anime club in school no matter how bad his guys played him out for it ‘cause they thought it was lame. He was the kid who woke up two hours early so he could see Tasha off to work and make sure to get King and Jaden ready for school. He was the kid who never got angry because he knew the value of life. He was everything I wished I embodied when I was his age. He kept his innocence, despite living in a harsh reality. Jamari was so at peace with life. I talk to him every day in my prayers just to keep him updated with everything. I tell him how much I'm gonna fight for him and how I'm gonna continue with all the things he promised his mother and brothers. I'm saying all this to say, even though his physical being is no longer with us, and his life was taken away tragically, his spirit still lives on,"Priest concluded, causing a round of applause to fill the church.

"To love, to family, to loyalty, to Jamari!"