Page 26 of The Last Thing (Baker Girls #4)

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

HALLIE

I let out a shaky breath as Wilson and I wait for the ultrasound tech to get everything set up. Right before they came to take me back, a nurse came in and said all my labs looked normal.

That’s something.

I wasn’t expecting to completely lose my shit and pour my soul out to Wilson, but… I know I’m safe with him. And even though he said some hard truths and encouraged me not to fear love, I never felt judged.

Though when he asked if I’d regret loving this baby even if we lost it, guilt almost overtook me.

Not because of Wilson or his words, but because of how selfish I was being.

How stupidly terrified I was. I’m afraid if the ultrasound shows the worst that I’ll completely break, but I also know I’ll cherish every time I held my stomach or talked to our baby or… any of it.

I don’t want to stunt my love for them out of fear.

In the chair beside me, Wilson has my hand in his, and he’s brushing his lips over it.

He’s my rock.

My safe place.

And… I’m falling in love with him. There’s no question about that.

I think some part of me has known that since the night we met. I’ve never felt a pull to someone like I do with him. And Sophia.

When we talked about coming down here for the weekend, he asked me if I was picturing us as a family, and the truth is, I have been since the very beginning. That’s what I want.

It’s time to stop pretending. To stop shutting out what we could be because I’m afraid of getting hurt.

After all these years, that won’t be easy. I’ll have to go slow. Whatever slow is when I spend every night in bed with the man whose baby I’m carrying, and whose daughter has already wormed her way into my heart.

Bit by bit they’re becoming my family, and while the side of me that screams there’s too much to lose, get out of there, is still loud and overwhelming, I’m never going to have what I want if I don’t work to silence those thoughts.

“Okay, I think we’re all set. Hallie, I’m going to hand you the wand, and you can insert it.”

I hate this part. All those damn TV shows where they squirt stuff on your belly when you’re not even through your first trimester are liars. To see the baby right now, I have to stick a wand up my lady business.

My hand shakes as I insert it.

This is it.

We’re either going to see our baby and everything will be fine, or…

I close my eyes. I don’t want to think about the or .

Wilson said his dad would’ve wanted him to have hope.

Hope .

I want to ask Wilson more about his dad. I feel bad I haven’t. Part of keeping someone’s memory alive is talking about them. It’s clear Wilson had a strong relationship with his dad. He should keep that alive.

The tech hits a few buttons, and Wilson squeezes my hand.

I turn toward him, because I don’t want to see the look on the tech’s face.

A couple more clicks, and Wilson’s eyes go wide.

I snap my eyes shut. No. I don’t want to?—

“Hallie. Look.”

I open my eyes, but don’t turn my head.

He looks at me and smiles softly.

“Trust me. Look.”

Slowly, I turn, and when I do, I’m greeted with the most beautiful sight I’ve ever beheld. Our tiny baby is there on the screen, little nubbin feet kicking. And then the tech hits another button and whooshing fills the room.

“That’s your baby’s heartbeat. One hundred fifty beats per minute, which is typical for this stage. I can’t say anything specific as that’s up to the doctor, but what we’re seeing is an overall good sign.”

“Thank you,” I murmur.

Wilson kisses my hand, then stares reverently at the screen as the tech takes a bunch of measurements.

“This is incredible,” he whispers.

I squeeze his hand, pulling his gaze back to me for a second.

“Thank you for not letting me give up.”

He smiles at me. “You’ve got too much love in your heart to ever do that.”

Everything’s okay.

As Wilson said when he came to me in the bathroom, it was nothing serious.

Just some light spotting after sex, which isn’t uncommon.

I already have my appointment with my OB next Wednesday, so they’ll do another check and make sure my labs look good, but the ER doctor seemed confident there’s no cause for concern.

I feel a little stupid for getting so upset, but I want this baby so much. The thought of losing them is horrifying. It felt a little too close to reality tonight.

Now I’m exhausted and want to crash, even though the adrenaline of it all has me so hyped I’m not sure I can.

Wilson has been quiet the entire ride back to my apartment. Old apartment. It still feels cozy, like a home away from home, but it’s not where I’m meant to be.

When I unlock the door and step inside, I let out a long breath. The door shuts behind me, then Wilson walks past me, going to the other side of the room and staring out the window.

I slip my shoes off and make my way over to him. His eyes stay locked on the little sliver of the city outside.

“Hey,” I whisper, running my hand up his arm.

Reluctantly, he turns to look at me, tears rimming his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” I grab both his hands and step in front of him, forcing his full attention on me.

“I don’t want to lose this.”

Oh God, my heart.

His voice is achingly raw.

“Sophia’s mom had a rough pregnancy, and I was always worried about what would happen to Sophia, but… maybe I was young or I didn’t care enough or I was a selfish jackass, but it never occurred to me to worry that Sophia’s mom wouldn’t be okay. With you? I was terrified tonight.”

“But you were so calm…”

He takes my face in his hands.

“On the outside. On the inside, I was barely keeping it together. Losing you or our child…”

A tear falls down his cheek, and my heart lurches.

Running my hands up his arms, I look into his eyes. “I’m okay. Our baby is okay.”

He kisses my forehead, then drops to his knees in front of me and lifts my shirt, kissing across my stomach.

“I’m so glad you’re okay, little one. Daddy loves you.”

Then his eyes lift to mine, and my heart feels the words he doesn’t say.

I curl my fingers through his hair as tears slide down my cheeks.

This is it. No more lying to myself. No more pretending. It’s time to give this a chance—a real chance. That all-consuming kind of love still terrifies me, but I know I’ll hate myself forever if I don’t give this my all.

I’ve always said yes to taking risks, as long as those risks didn’t include my heart. Well, fuck that. My heart is already on the line. Time to see what happens when I offer him a piece.

I tug on his hair, pulling him upright, then his mouth melts over mine in a warm, comforting kiss. Our first kiss that isn’t out of pent-up desire. A kiss that isn’t leading anywhere. It’s a kiss that’s about us. The us we could be. The us I want to be.

He breaks the kiss and pulls me into his arms, and I bury my face in his chest.

He strokes his fingers through my hair and I melt into him a little more.

“Can we go to bed?” I murmur. “I just want to lie in your arms.”

He hugs me tighter, kissing my head. “I’ll hold you all night.”

Wilson’s warm hand rubs over my stomach as we lie in bed.

He held me all night. We fell asleep wrapped in each other’s arms and we both slept so hard I don’t think either of us moved.

We’ve spent the last half hour lying in each other’s arms and talking. Kissing. Being a couple.

Telling my parents we were dating was never a lie. I know that’s what we’ve been doing for weeks, even if I’ve been too afraid to call it that. Last night put a lot of things into perspective.

Am I still terrified of what falling in love means? Absolutely. But I’m done trying to stop it from happening. I’ll just have to prepare myself to face the consequences one day.

“I love your little bump,” he whispers, brushing his thumb over my slightly raised belly button. “I can’t wait to watch it grow.”

“Me either.”

I brush my knuckles over his cheek, drawing his eyes to mine.

“Do you want more kids?”

He stares at me for a second. “I’m going to say this, but don’t take it the wrong way. You need to hear everything first.”

“Okay.”

“The night we met, I was thinking how Sophia has been saying she wanted a sister, and how I couldn’t even consider it.

There was too much change and too much going on to even think about the idea.

Then you told me you were pregnant, and after the initial shock wore off, all I felt was joy.

I realized it was never about not being ready for another kid, it was that I’d convinced myself I couldn’t have that.

Or wouldn’t. Now I know exactly how much I want it.

And I wouldn’t mind having more.” He slides his hand up and plays with a strand of my hair. “What about you?”

“Being a mom was always my dream. I imagined using the turkey baster method to get there and probably only having one—maybe two. But…” I clear my throat. “With the right person, I’d love to have more.”

I can see it. Us in a cute little house like the one he grew up in, Sophia and a couple more kids playing in the backyard while Wilson rubs my round stomach as we watch from the back porch.

It’s overwhelming, but there’s no denying I want it.

I’ve never been more scared to want something in my life. To dream of it and hope for it.

Hope .

After what Wilson said about his dad last night, that word keeps dancing around in my mind.

I’m scared, but I’m letting hope guide me. I’m letting my heart lead, and I’m trying to ignore the devastation that could cause.

“With the right person?” Wilson rumbles.

I sweep my hand over his cheek. “Like a super hot baby daddy named after a back porch.”

He throws his head back and laughs.

I love that laugh—the pure joy that spills out of him. That side of him is as endearing as it is fun.

“I thought we agreed you’d call me Wilson.”

“And I am. But in the back of my mind, I’ll always remember the ridiculous name you gave me the night we met. Oh, maybe we should name our baby Patio. No. Terrace.”

“Hellion…”

“I like when you get growly.”

His lips slant over mine, and my body hums with desire. Not for sex, but for him. To be close to him.

“Do you have any serious names in mind for the baby?” he asks after he breaks our kiss.

“Maybe. We’ll see when we find out what we’re having.”

“Fine. Keep your secrets.”

“I like being mysterious.”

“Mhm.” He pulls me closer. “I wish every morning could be like this.”

“Lazy and cozy?”

“With you in my arms.”

I swallow hard. “Maybe it should be like this every morning.”

His brows dart up. “Really?”

“If you’re okay with me not doing the walk of shame at five in the morning—at least, after we tell Sophia.”

“I love the sound of that.”

“Good.”

He lets out a long breath. “What do you think? Should we get up and enjoy the city?”

Slowly, I nod. “For a little while. Then I want to go home. To Sophia… to our life.”

My heart beats harder when I say the words. Maybe it’s too heavy-handed. But I want him to know I’m jumping into this.

“Our life?”

“Mhm. It’s unpredictable and a little chaotic, but I like it.”

He stares at me for a beat, then kisses my forehead. “I like it too. Every second.”

Then instead of getting up, he pulls me closer, and I nestle against him, dreaming of all the things this week might bring.