Page 9 of The King’s Bodyguard (Catkin Trilogy #1)

Landis

I stared at Corrin, barely comprehending what I’d just heard.

Corrin also seemed to be processing everything in shock as well.

He ran a hand absently through his wild, wavy hair.

Far from smoothing it out, his fingers tugged several more ebony strands free from the tie which held up half of his hair.

Part of me wanted to laugh. Not only at Corrin and his characteristic brashness but also at the gentlecats who tittered and gasped at his words.

Rhenn snorted dismissively at Corrin. Corrin’s spine stiffened. His shoulders widened, and he took a step forward. Judging by the firm set to his jaw and the scowl on his face, Corrin was ready to wade into the debate… with fisticuffs.

Inwardly, I sighed. As much as I wanted to see Corrin whip some manners into Rhenn, this was not the time and place to do it.

Lord Berrymay and Lord Carl were pushing their way through the crowd with matching scowls on their faces.

Glancing at Corrin, I shot him a quick pleading look to keep silent.

Thankfully, Corrin seemed to understand me.

He eased back a little, but the tension in his posture remained.

“What is going on here?” Lord Berrymay asked.

“A tiff, my lord.” Lady Hartford gazed at Rhenn and Colm with disapproval.

She was ignoring Corrin, clearly not wishing to cede the floor to a Munni.

“I was just about to thrash Colm for his impertinence,” Rhenn was explaining in a snotty voice. “When some upstart Munni barbarian opened his mouth.”

Barbarian? I automatically began to protest, but the first word out of my mouth was overruled by Alan.

“There was some... misunderstanding,” Alan was saying with his usual awkwardness. “But all is set to rights now.”

“Hardly,” Rhenn said stiffly. “Munni should know better than to speak unbidden. He ought to be flogged. If I was the King, I would discharge the barbarian instantly.”

Everyone’s gaze then turned toward me. Already, I could hear the murmurs. A few matrons hissed at each other behind the fans, clearly enjoying the moment of truth. The males muttered and grumbled. I caught a few phrases.

“He’s just a boy-”

“-he would stand up to a Munni? Hm. We shall see.”

“-or maybe there is something there...”

“Well, you know his mother. Low breed, low tastes.”

A flush rose to my cheeks, but when I glanced over at Corrin, I could see he was literally beside himself. Rage glinted in his deep green eyes. His gloved hands had curled into fists, and his ebony tail swished from side to side. Growling a little, he stepped forward.

“There is nothing wrong with an honest question,” he said with a cold voice that lashed at Rhenn. “I admit to my impertinence. For that, I will beg pardon of His Royal Highness, but I do not answer to you. Besides, there is no honor to be found in this farcical misrepresentation of aberrancy.”

“Aberrancy?” Alan asked, raising an eyebrow. “You find our customs abhorrent?”

“It’s...” Corrin managed to rein himself in just barely, but his disdain of the entire room was plain to see.

Clearly, the revelation about the skerra potion had upset him on some level.

It was common knowledge, if little discussed that when one’s time came, when the rut came upon catkin, the skerra potion removed most effects.

Every single person in the room no doubt could recall the day that their skin became inflamed and fever burst through them.

The unrelieved ache, thanks to skerra spice, would give way to languor.

I could still recall the day I had become flushed with the first fever.

My tutor had rushed me to my room where a maid had administered the draught.

For the next day and a half, I spent most of my time sleeping.

I had only been sixteen winters old. All of my life, I had expected it to come upon me, and I would deal with it as my mother and father had. It was traditional for our kin.

Looking at Corrin, however, it was clear that he’d not been aware of our customs. The Derulan were an upright, traditional family. It was entirely possible that none of the Sunna in Velamere consorted with their Munni subjects.

Or perhaps Corrin had spent too many years in the wild and never asked?

Or had he simply assumed that Sunna and Munni experienced the same things?

Either way, Corrin seemed to think our tradition despicable.

Everyone else bridled in the face of his disgust, but I could see deep down, when he looked at me, that beneath his anger lay something I wouldn’t name here and now.

He’s sorry for us , I realized as our gazes met yet again. He wishes things were different for... me.

“-unless our good king here has some reason he would like to share with this party?” Rhenn’s voice broke into my thoughts.

“Pardon?” I asked coolly.

“You, sirrah,” Corrin snarled, “ought to be on your knees in apology to your king! For such disrespect!”

“Rhenn,” Lord Carl began to calmly order the crowd. “Stand down, boy. Marvin, tell Colm to back off. Ser Hugh, get that guard in order.”

Ser Hugh laid a hand on Corrin’s shoulder, but Corrin refused to budge. He glared at Rhenn, who suddenly took a few steps back toward his father. Rhenn glanced at me apprehensively. I glared back at him. The young gentlecat had taken liberties with his tongue.

“Apologies, Your Majesty,” Rhenn ground out, not sounding apologetic at all.

Rhenn bowed stiffly and stalked off, taking five of his friends with him. Colm also bowed to me and offered his apologies. He kept his gaze averted from Corrin’s glare. The crowd, realizing that no flogging or dismissal was about to happen any time soon, slowly disbanded.

“He really ought to be punished,” Lord Morne said.

Of course. Yes. Lord Morne was suddenly here.

I glanced over at Morne. He was hugging a large plate stacked high with meat pasties.

Dabbing at his mouth with a handkerchief daintily, the lord handed off the plate to a nearby servant.

He brushed some crumbs off his beard, which, I realized, had some stray gray hairs now threading through the brown.

My cousin ignored my hard stare and looked Corrin up and down with distaste.

When Lord Morne began to suggest that Corrin be flogged or discharged, I had to step in.

No doubt Corrin recognized that his behavior had given Lord Morne an opportunity to critique me.

Instantly, Corrin was on one knee with a ready apology.

His shoulders remained stiff, but his ears were flattened in contrition, and his tail hung low.

“I will admit to-to speaking out when I ought not to have,” Corrin finally admitted. “My anger got the best of me. For that, I am sorry. I will await any punishment you see fit to mete out, Your Majesty... and Ser Starr.”

My heart skipped a little, and I fought to keep a growing smile off my face. Instead, I nodded and caught Lord Morne’s eye. It was important for me to show that I had everything in control, even if I clearly didn’t. Ser Hugh and High Mage Alan waited patiently for my command.

It was hard to find the words as I came to grips with this new Corrin.

I didn’t know much about Corrin the stalwart guard, but that brash, outspoken, fierce friend still remained deep within.

He had stood by my side, and done his best to fulfill his duty.

He had even given me comfort. Whatever happened, I would carry our dance in my memories always.

To show ingratitude would not sit well with me.

After making everyone wait, I declared my intention to return to the palace with Corrin. Ser Hugh, Lord Elthorne, and Lord Gareth would, I pointed out, determine disciplinary action should it be required. Lord Morne, recognizing that I would not be budged, gave way.

With that, I lifted my head, stiffened my spine, gazed through Lord Morne as if he wasn’t actually there, swiveled about, and made my way toward Lady Hartford.

I didn’t look back. As commanded, Corrin followed me to where Lady Hartford stood, attended by her companion.

Bowing low, I thanked Lady Hartford for her hospitality.

I remembered to praise her apple pastries and the music arrangements. I apologized for the uproar as well.

Lady Hartford, beaming as always, told me not to worry.

According to her, such dramatics were the spice of a good ball.

Her ball would be remembered for months to come.

Even so, I noticed that her gray-eyed gaze rested more often on Corrin than on me.

Behind me, Corrin bowed as well, uttering a short apology, which was graciously accepted.

With everything more or less smoothed over, I descended to the waiting Royal carriage.

Corrin, clambering on the box, said nothing more, now the perfect picture of responsibility and respectability.

As if he hadn’t just given a pack of lords and ladies a tongue-lashing.

I grinned to myself. I am never going to forget it. He will never live it down, honestly.

I wouldn’t forget the fire in his eyes as he defended me. He had clearly been upset on my behalf. Not just the way they spoke about me. Something told me that he had been truly horrified upon learning about the skerra potion. Hopefully, he would tell me what he was thinking.

When we finally arrived at the castle, I commanded Corrin to my private office. Once there, I ordered tea. Corrin took up a spot by the fire, gazing down moodily at the cheery flames. After pouring two cups of tea, I offered one to him.

Corrin hesitated. Then, he sat gingerly down beside me on the long chestnut lounge.

Although we sat shoulder to shoulder by the fire, sipping tea, I felt as though Corrin were on the other side of the country.

His troubled green eyes gazed at the brilliant orange flames before us in a distant kind of way.

“A bronze for your thoughts.” I nudged him.

“Apologies,” he murmured. “There is much on my mind tonight.”

“I would know your thoughts,” I said. “After everything you’ve done for me, I hope I can repay you in some small way.”

“After everything I’ve done for you...?” He chuckled dryly. “That’s a funny way of saying ’cause a fuss’.”

“You weren’t intending to cause a commotion.” I gazed down at the fragile china cup in my hand. “I could tell. You weren’t angry. You were... horrified. By how they were treating me. By the potion.”

“I still am,” Corrin said. “I’m just hiding it better. As I should have done at the ball.”

He leaned forward, set his cup and saucer down with a click, and then turned a little.

I clutched onto my saucer and looked up at him, valiantly trying to keep my breathing even.

My heart was racing, and it was becoming a struggle to not stare at him—at the firm swell of his lips, at the hard set of his jawline, at the broad lines of his shoulders.

I just wanted to lean forward and rest my head right there, twine his arms about me, and close my eyes.

I sighed and set down my tea cup. The Corrin that sat before me wouldn’t do that.

“Tell me?” I asked. “I-I don’t understand, Corrin.”

Corrin looked at me like I had grown two heads.

“How can I understand when this is all I’ve ever known?” I tried to explain again.

After a moment, Corrin looked down. Hesitantly, he placed his broad palm over my hand.

Against my tan skin, his paleness stood out starkly, but the feeling of his thumb running along the inside of my palm felt warm.

It was like a spark of fire or of lightning, racing up from my hand to my spine, my belly, and lower.

“Living in the mountains, I didn’t really spend time with the Sunna. Goddess knows the Derulan family weren’t about to give us the time of day,” Corrin said slowly. “I had no idea that this was a commonly held custom among your kin.”

“The Munni don’t use a potion?” I asked curiously.

“No.”

“How do they get through it? What do they use?”

“Sex.”

His voice suddenly sounded huskier than normal.

“Sex,” I said, suddenly feeling hot all over. “You’ve-you’ve...”

Corrin nodded and slowly met my eyes.

“We allow nature to take its course. She was—“ He stopped and shook his head. “Never mind that. It was simply a moment in time. We both shared two days of pleasure together.”

“A molly.” Something inside of me cried out.

“Yes,” Corrin said. “In the end, mollies weren’t of interest to me, but... I do not regret that time for the world.”

“Oh,” Relief washed over me.

“But you, you didn’t experience that-that moment of pleasure and happiness,” Corrin said slowly. “You never had a chance. If I could, I would have...”

“You would have what?” I found myself leaning forward, clutching his hand.

Corrin’s hand rose, and he brushed back a stray golden lock that had caught on my eyelash. Something sad and wistful crossed his face before disappearing. Something he refused to name.

I wanted to know. Needed to know. As if reading my mind, Corrin leaned in.

Now we shared the same breath, our noses brushing against each other.

Suddenly feeling shy and breathless, my eyelids fluttered closed.

I wanted it so much—the touch of his lips against mine.

My first kiss. If only it could belong to Corrin.

The tension within me coiled about. All of my senses honed in on the tom before me.

His outdoorsy scent, the strength of his hand on mine, and the tantalizing brush of his nose and then forehead.

For a minute, I leaned against him. I wanted to take the first step, but I had no idea really how to start. What if I made a fool of myself?

As if sensing my hesitancy, misreading my quivering desire, Corrin drew back. My chest grew tighter as the moment passed. Corrin was so close, and yet so far away. I clung to his hand a moment longer, but when it drew away, I let it go reluctantly.

“I would have tried to make you happy. Even if it was for a short time, it would be better than nothing,” he said huskily. “Now, more than ever, I recognize the sacrifice you make for us.”

“It’s hard,” I admitted, wishing he would have leaned in and kissed me.

I didn’t quite understand what drove Corrin to this moment, but I enjoyed the way he was looking at me.

It was as though I was the only cat in the world.

I shifted closer, enjoying his faint warmth, the scent of apple that we now both shared, and the faint scent of horse and night air.

I wished he could remain at my side forever.

“But with you around, it’s easier. You will stay, won’t you, Corrin?”

“Always,” he promised.