Page 12 of The Italian Reckoning (A New York Criminal Empire #3)

ROCKY

I t’s a risk. A stupid, spur of the moment, desperate risk half to distract her and stop her from talking and half to satisfy my curiosity about what she tastes like. It’s a stroke of luck that she didn’t try to arrest me the second I pulled out my gun.

But I’ve done it.

I’ve kissed her.

She stands frozen in my arms for half a second, and just when I’m considering that this might be a step too far, Sarah kisses me back. She has absolutely no idea who I am, yet she’ll stand with me in this dark parking lot with light sparks raining down from the light I shot and kiss me.

For the first time in a long time, my mind goes quiet.

There’s no noise, no rampant thoughts, no nervous energy bleeding out through the repetitive movement of my leg or my fingers tapping together.

There’s just… silence.

My pulse quickens as Sarah shifts against me, but she’s only tilting her head to better align our lips. Her soft breath rushes over my cheek as our lips part for just a second, then we’re locked back together and that deep sense of silent peace spreads down my body like a trickle of rainwater.

She’s shorter than me so it’s almost too easy to lean over her and use the kiss to force her head to tilt backward, but she doesn’t fight it.

Soft fingertips caress my jaw, then sweep around to bury in my hair.

Her other hand rests on the crock of my elbow, and as I dip her backward slightly, she steps into me by placing a leg between mine.

I tighten my arm around her waist until we’re perfectly aligned and deepen the kiss, running my tongue along the seam of her lips.

She whimpers softly, a sound barely reaching my ears through the pulse drum racing around my body.

Applying the slightest pressure, her lips part for me, and I lick slowly into the heat of her mouth.

Cupping her face, I keep my touch away from her injured ear and caress her cheek as my tongue delves deeper and deeper into her mouth.

Sarah shifts against me and her grip tightens in my hair, sending a thrill of heat lancing down my torso where it settles in my lower belly.

Fuck .

In this moment, nothing else matters.

My mind and my world are at peace with her in my arms.

I kiss her until there’s no air left in my lungs, until I have nothing left to give but a soft, gasping press of my lips and a caress of her lower back.

We break apart and she gasps, lifting a hand to her lips. Then I leave her there, standing in the parking lot, and race away with my helmet in hand before her eyes can adjust to the darkness and show her who I really am.

If she knew I was Rocky Barati, she would never touch me, never mind give a kiss like that.

Fucking hell.

By the time I pull up the driveway to home, the noise is back and worse than ever.

The strange, peaceful silence Sarah granted me with a single touch seems to have amplified the loudness of the brain noise I contend with on the daily.

I’m always alert, always running scenarios through my mind to keep my family and my people safe, calculating the next business move that my father will never let me take, evaluating our relationships with other families including those outside of the Italian circles.

And on top of that, my mind is constantly noise about the right thing to do to keep on my father’s good side and I’m already pushing that with Sarah.

Matteo’s fist collides with my jaw the second I walk into the study with more strength than a man his age should possess. It floors me completely and ironically silences the anxious rush of thoughts in my mind.

“ Ow .”

“What the fuck were you thinking?” he yells, standing over me and slamming his cane down a few inches away from my head. “One shot, Rocky. One fucking shot and our problems would be over!”

“They wouldn’t be over,” I say weakly, prodding gingerly at my teeth with the tip of my tongue while blood floods my mouth. “Killing a cop doesn’t stop our problems.”

“Killing this cop does!” He slams his cane against the floor once more. “You interrupted an assassination that I ordered. Do you have any idea how weak that makes me look? It looks like I can’t control my own men, my own fucking son .”

I learned from a young age not to get up until he stops yelling, so I lie there swallowing my own blood and staring up at him through a slight dizzy haze.

“Dad, you need to stop caring so much about what people think. If you spoke to them, if you actually put yourself out there and gave people the answers, then you wouldn’t be in this position. ”

“Don’t tell me what’s best. I know what’s fucking best. You don’t see what I see. You don’t see the sharks circling or the snakes in the grass with those fucking Irish bastards or the Ruskies.”

“They’re our friends?—”

“Competition!” He stomps his cane and turns away from me in disgust. “You grow too close to our enemies and now you save a cop? A fucking pig over my orders?”

“Sarah saved my life.” Delicately, I pick myself up from the floor. “I owe her. It’s a debt I had to repay.”

“Off my back?” He spins to face me, the cane raised. “Do you want me to look weak? Powerless? Like I’m ripe for the picking? Do you want some greedy little fucker to slash my throat in my sleep?”

“Of course not!” It’s hard not to yell back, but every time he screams in my face, my spine bunches up like a spring. “Dad, this isn’t what you think! You’re paranoid after Noah, I get that?—”

“Don’t mention that fucker to me!”

“Sorry. But closing down like this hasn’t done anything for us!

You see everyone as the enemy, you won’t even acknowledge that if you focused on our smaller families, Noah wouldn’t have happened, and now Gio is breaking and instead of us supporting him, you’re turning your back and sweeping it under the rug like it isn’t happening! ”

I could dodge his fist the second time, but experience has taught me that he only gets worse. This blow doesn’t knock me to the ground, but I do stumble back as teeth rattle around my mouth.

“You listen here, Rocky, and you listen good. You have no idea what you are talking about. You spend all your time running about, never taking on any real responsibility, and I allow it because I promised your mother that I wouldn’t be too hard on you.

But you will show me the respect I deserve and have earned, understand?

Your loyalty is to me, do you hear me? Me and this family.

Not the cops. Not the Irish. Not any other family.

Me . And the only good cop is a paid cop.

If they don’t accept it, then I want them dead!

You have wasted more than enough time on Belle. I want this over!”

“Dad.” I can’t help but press him. Perhaps it’s in my nature to push back against him, but can I really call myself a decent person if I don’t at least try?

“No! I gave you an inch because Gio is your friend, and you took a fucking mile.”

“But these friendships keep us in power. It’s what smoothed over our alliance with the Irish and what made the Russians happy to help! Don’t you see? Killing Sarah will do nothing but bring the death of a policewoman to the top of every headline in the city.”

“She dies.” Anger blazes in my father’s eyes. “You defied me by saving her and now I look incapable. I will not let that happen again, you understand me? She dies and you will give up this foolish search. In fact, I’m sending you away.”

“What?”

“I need someone to oversee some trouble at the casino and it’s the perfect way to keep you out of my path. But if you fuck up again, Rocky? I won’t be so forgiving.”